(A collaboration post between [@Shyri], [@Wilted Rose], [@Mihndar], [@Pepperm1nts] and I. 

God rest your souls)

[b]Berlin, German Empire[/b]


As the sun began to lower in the sky, the Royal German Zeppelin, the Fischadler, readied to take its place. The black balloons began to fill with helium as the last of the foreign envoys boarded, leaving only Kaiser Wilhelm, who was having his ear chewed out by his foreign affairs advisor.

"Remember, these are high, if not the highest, ranking officials of potential allies. Germany could use those in the world right now, so try to be the Kaiser, not Wilhelm. We don't need another Belgium in our hands. Small country does not mean talking down to them, and-"

"Yes, yes, I understand. That was a one time occurrence. Besides, it's not my fault the Belgian had an inflated ego. Now, I really must go. It would not do for the Fischadler to take to the sky without it's host, correct?"

With a nod of understanding, the Kaiser's advisor split away from him, heading back indoors, as the Kaiser headed for the Zeppelin, trailing two guards.

Once inside, one of the guards broke off to let the captain know the Kaiser was on board, while Wilhelm made his way to the lounge where his guests were waiting, making sure he looked his best before entering.

"Good evening, ladies, gentlemen, friends, and welcome to Berlin. I hope those of you who arrived last night and earlier today enjoyed your day in the city. Now, before we begin, if you need any refreshments, simply wave down Andrea." He said, motioning to a young woman with curly blonde hair. "She will be happy to retrieve anything you require. She also speaks both German and Russian, so, for my Russian guests, you can freely make requests in your own tongue."

Taking his own seat at the head of the long table, Wilhelm put on a pair of glasses, and opened the file that had been left there for him, glancing over it.

"Now, seeing as how The Ottomans called us all together, I think it only fitting that Herr Pasha gets this meeting started."

Erdem Mehmedoglo Pasha, the Ottoman plenipotentiary, nodded, his almost comically small fez almost falling from his head. "Thank you, your Grace" he replied in heavily accented German, adjusting his fez somewhat before returning to Turkish. "The Sublime Porte's interests in European affairs have been marked with concern following events in the last few years. It seems the age of the European Empires has faltered, leaving a power vacuum that will be filled by vile and evil characters. As you have all no doubt read in my Sultans letter, the growth of ideologies such as Marxism and liberalism in Europe are extremely worrying. What we are proposing is a strong alliance of European powers, an enlarged Quadruple Alliance if you will, to combat violent revolutionary governments in Europe and return the continent to the peace we saw prior to the Great War. We are not proposing a return to the chaos of the Great War but instead a new order of states to guide the misguided of our continent"

Erdem paused as translators whispered into the ears of the other representatives before continuing.

"The first motion we would like to propose is a return to the Concert system of the last century in order to nurture the fragile peace that Europe currently lays in. All nations represented here today would be allowed to call a Concert of the recognised European powers in order to find diplomatic solutions to disputes between legitimate governments and if the situation calls for it, military intervention that also respects the sovereignty of each member nation. Each of the permanent members have veto powers and only recognised Great Powers may join this permanent council.

Secondly, we would like to propose a motion of support of the preservation of monarchies and empires of Europe and condemnation of communist, socialist and extreme nationalist movements. The Sublime Porte are concerned by the rapid growth in power of Greek and French communist governments but believes that diplomatic solutions can be achieved.  

Finally, we would like to propose the drawing up of spheres of influence in Europe, the Middle East and Africa. In order to preserve European hegemony, we believe that a return to colonialism in Africa is paramount to counter the growth of the so-called East African Confederation. In order to maintain a lasting peace in Europe, we believe the divisions of states among borders guaranteeing peace and not nationalism must, once again, become the norm. Thank you" 

"There are some immediate concerns." Aleksei Burov, the Russian envoy, began. "The proposal, as it stands, or at least as presented just now, requires that the member states of this hypothetical organization be recognized sovereign entities." He glanced toward the Ukrainian Hetman. "The proposal also speaks of the destabilization of Europe brought about by the fervent nationalism that has manifested in our nations in the past decade or more, and yet, we are sitting here today with the representative of one such nationalist front - a territory not recognized by most major European powers. This very same proposal then calls for the preservation and support of European monarchies in the face of nationalist and communist aggression. The inclusion of Ukraine and other rebelling territories of the Russian Empire in the organization proposed today are directly contrary to the aforementioned points, and I see no way for this organization to take form in a manner that is true to the founding principles presented by the Ottoman plenipotentiary if Ukraine and other rebel states are welcomed at the table as legitimate political entities."

Anastasiya Solovski, the Ukrainian monarch, was quickly asking the waitress, Andrea, for some more wine in Russian when she heard Burov begin, and her eyes snapped back towards the conversation at hand. "This matter is only truly a concern if the fading afterglow of a lost empire insists upon the control over all of the lands which it once held sway. It would be one thing if your nation actually even controlled the majority of Russia, but you're rather just some sort of Baltic state now, no?" Anastasiya took a sip from her glass and continued. "I and therefore Ukraine have come here in the spirit of peace and cooperation, as we face rather severe threats to the stability of Europe, if not the world. Our traditions and way of life are being challenged and we perhaps stand on the verge of a new dark age if we cannot find a way out. And you have evidently come here to stir up conflict over territory you can't even begin to reach? This infighting serves no purpose except that of the communists, liberals and nationalists within my fellow monarchies. Are we a national state, which has become independent from the Russian Empire of more than a half decade past? Yes. But the ideal of this conference is to preserve the status quo of European hegemony. The Russian Empire's age is past. We are here now, and we are committed to the struggle, as shown even know with our war with communists in Eastern Ukraine. It does not do for us European nations to fight each other over past claims. If we must indeed resort to that, I would point out that there was a Kievan Russia well before the Muscovy from which your empire descends ever came to exist. It is not as if I do not support Russia's right to reclaim its ancestral lands. There is a considerable proportion of Russia which still lies in the control of criminals, warlords, and other undesirable elements. These areas can and should be retaken by the "Russian Empire," and perhaps they should concentrate on them first before picking figh
ts with one of the few stable countries to emerge from the mess which they allowed to happen in the first place."

"Imperialism is a natural right of any monarchy. It is indeed the duty of a civilized European state to bring civilization to the barbarous masses of Asia and Africa, and Ukraine fully supports the Ottomans' effort to do so. But it is patently ridiculous to support conflicts between civilized, stable European states when threats loom on the horizon. We are not nationalist radicals who intend to liberate each and every one of your tiny minorities. We are a traditional monarchy just like yours of some forty million people which stands as a stable borderland against the anarchy and subversion to the east which threatens to spill over into your nations. I humbly ask that all of you consider supporting us in that effort rather than fanning the flames of what is now Russia further."

"Now then, let's not get rash and over to top." Spoke up a rather old man, clutching his cane as he stepped forward. His grizzled face covered with an eye-patch over his left eye and a comically large handlebar mustache. Count Maximillian von Mannheimer, the Federation's Chief Diplomat. Most likely one of the few people in this room to not only remember the Great War, but to have fought in it too.

"Need I remind you all that the Danubian Federation has offered official diplomatic recognition to the Ukrainian State? Indeed, Anastasiya's words do hold merit. That does not mean she had to speak the way she did, but it has been said. Our old political fueds should be put aside for the moment to focus on the rising tide of the far-left within all of Europe. While I do not condone rampant Imperialism as if it is our 'god-given right', I do condone the destruction of Communist Regimes wherever they may prop up. Be it in Europe, Africa, or Asia. On to the condition of… Nationalism, sometimes it would be better to bend then to break. The Austro-Hungarian Empire bended, and the Russian Empire broke."

A hand would move up to rest on Mannheimer's shoulder, gently moving him to bow as a woman took the spotlight from him. Archduchess Seraphina, Heiress of the Habsburg Throne bowed her head ever so slightly to the assembled room of Diplomats and Nobility. 

"It would do little good to simply mimic what von Mannheimer said, but do know that I share his sentiments. We have gathered here, all of us, on the agreement to rekindle the fire of Europe and the crush the rising tide of Communism, Syndicalism, and Socialism. Yet we have barely begun, and already squabbles break out between us. Let it be proclaimed then, that the Danubian Federation will claim the responsability of resisting the rise of Communism within the Balkan States, with or without this Congress."

Kaiser Wilhelm, who had been stroking his beard while listening up to this point, finally stood, commanding attention to him.  

“If the notion of this meeting is as Herr Pasha has said, then it can only be concluded that the Turkish state does not view the Ukrainian independent state as an 'extreme nationalist movement', seeing as Miss Solovski is sitting at this table. If that is true, then I am sure that the Turks also fully recognize the legitimacy of the Armenian people's government, and also intend to allow them to hold their independence. Unless I have misunderstood the intentions...” he said with a slightly accusatory tone. “Then I feel we can consider this matter settled, and move on to more pressing matters.

"We feel a recognition of Armenian independence would be disruptive to European trade in the Middle East, Kaiser" replied Erdem cooly. "We in the Ottoman Empire do not condone the existance of breakaway states. However, the invitation of the Hetman comes from a place of pragmatism and in no way signifies Ottoman recognition of the regime over that of the Tsar. But the Red threat is a concern to Istanbul, owing to its proximity to the Caucasus and Eastern Europe and from what we see, the Ukrainian national state has been the only nation in Europe successfully fighting communism".

"Your hypocrisy astounds me, Herr Pasha." Wilhelm replied sharply. "If all it takes for Turkey to recognize such a state is fighting a common foe, your people must truly be backed against the wall. It makes me question whether you are capable of helping anyone, or if the old man of Europe simply called us all here to help him fix his problems."

Taking a drink of water, the Kaiser took on a formal pose, arms behind his back. “We are not here to debate legitimacy. We are not here to squabble minor details. We are here to find a fix to the threat which plagues us all. The threat that lead to the strife currently besetting the mighty Russian Empire. The threat that we see taking control of various states more and more often these days. Ladies and gentlemen. We are here to find a way to destroy the communist threat. Paris. Moscow. Athens. Beijing. It spreads like wildfire across the globe, destroying all it comes in contact with. The options are fight, or fall. I don't know about you, but the German's do not intend to fall. I could care less about the Afrikan's, especially those in Ethiopia. They stood by us in the Great War, and have communists within their borders as well. They should be an ally, not an enemy.”

Sighing, Kaiser Wilhelm took a slow look around the table.  

“So far, all I have heard is personal agenda's, and all I have seen is hungry eyes looking for support. If that is what you want from this alliance, then by all means, hold a second meeting in Constan-” he heald up a hand, signaling his translator to not finish the last part. “A second meeting in Istanbul. However, if all you want from this alliance is furthering of your personal issues, and not a stop to the red menace, then you can consider Germany not interested.”

With that, Wilhelm basically fell to his seat, the wood of the chair creaking as he landed. “I am here because I want to save Europe from itself. If this conflicts with your interests, please, take a stand now. If I am in the minority, I shall take my leave to the back room. However, if I lead the majority, then we can begin talking seriously.”

Anastasiya nodded emphatically when the Kaiser had finished his speech. "It is very true that the issues of legitimacy and nationalism are far removed from what we are here to discuss, and I would have preferred to not see it brought up. Even now, Ukrainian troops are engaged in battle with communist insurgents in the east. There are other Bolshevik remnants in the rest of Russia which need to be dealt with. It is not the time to hash out these issues."

"It is the belief of the Sultan that an alliance with the Hetmanate to fight the Eastern Communists is attainable, in order to prevent the further spread of the red plague into our nations. While we respect the Tsar's claims to his rightful empire, we will ask the table to look at the situation. The Tsar has lost control of much of His empire and now controls, de facto, the immediate area of St. Petersburg and the city itself. He cannot be at the forefront of fighting our common enemies without huge support from His allies, which would be a threat to Russian sovereignty. It is desirable to all of us that a powerful Russian state be reinstated, with or without Ukraine, but at a later date," said Erdem, looking around at the table.

"If we are ready to continue on with the conference, I'd ask the table to vote on our first proposal. We can all value from co-operation and it is clear from the meeting today that many of our nations have grievances that can be discussed and sorted, diplomatically. The establishment of a European Concert can see us unite our resources, with the goal of maintaining a peaceful and free Europe while respecting the sovereignty of the Great Powers."

"Russia will not be signing an agreement to assemble or take part in a concert of nations that recognizes Ukraine and other rightful territories of the Russian Empire as independent member states." The Russian diplomat said bluntly. 

After a long, whispered conversation with his advisor and translator, Kaiser Wilhelm stood once more.

"I have already sworn German might to the Russian cause. The true Russian cause. And seeing as this meeting has devolved into a plea for a welfare payment on behalf of the Turks, I fail to see how this will truly move forward. Every proposal so far is only beneficial to Turkey. The inclusion of Ukraine is justified on a petty clause, only because it aids the Turks. I defended Miss Solovski's presence, because I had hoped this meeting would be something worthwhile. That the presence of a pretender state might be justifiable, because it was backed by a strong proposal. But I see now that this meeting is simply a plea for aid from the sick old man, that would benefit only him, and the Ukrainians by extension. Germany is fully capable of combatting the Red Threat of it's own. Clearly, I had assumed the Ottomans stronger than they truly are. I will not stand in attendence for a meeting led by the spectre of a country that no longer exists."

Without another word, Kaiser Wilhelm turned, motioning for his entourage to follow, and left the meeting room. 

The Archduchess would rise from her seat as well, Mannheimer quickly rising to follow her example. "I see this is pointless then. The German Empire only came here to project it's own influence over the decadant remains of the lost Russian Empire. That's why the Russians were invited, after all. Clearly, this entire meeting remained nothing but another powerplay between the powers here to carve out spheres on influence in the "attempt" to destroy communism. The Danubian Federation does not need this alliance, and it does not need the petty squabbles of a destroyed Empire dividing Europe's attention. We will deal with our own communist threats, and handle our own problems." She said, bowing her head slightly and motioning for Mannheimer to follow her away from the table.

Yet he stayed for a moment, and spoke up himself; "Europe has done nothing but fight and destroy itself for the past two centuries. From Napoleon, to Crimea, to the Great War. We have learned nothing from these events. The German Empire only cares about making sure it remains the sole power in Europe. The Russian "Empire" cares only that it gets the help and money it so desperatly needs so it can maintain some shred of legitimacy with an Empire they destroyed themselves. The Ottomans want help fighting enemies it itself can not fight alone. We, the Danubian Federation, have fought and bled to keep our nation and people safe. We can not in good conscious waste our resources and efforts helping you in doing nothing but assisting in your own goals. We withdraw from this meeting."

With that, Mannheimer turned on his heel and walked away with the Archduchess.

[s]Erdem jumped to his feet. "Y-yeah? K-keep walking, fuckers!" he screeched. "We don't need you fags anyway!"
/s

Wilhelm then orders his Secret Service agents to throw Erdem and Solovski off the back of the blimp. "I told you we would win this meeting." he said to Burov, smiling.

Erdem smiled as he flew through the air and tipped his fez over his fringe. "It's most unkind to be rude to a lady, m'Kaiser" he muttered, landing on his heelie skates. "I'll be back - and so will the Janissaries". With that, Erdem skated off towards Istanbul, leaving only a dust shaped cloud of a Turkish diplomat in his wake.[/s]

Erdem loudly sighed and sat back in his chair, rubbing his eyes. He glanced at his translator and at the two envoys still sat in front of him. The Hetman herself and the Russian ambassador. "You speak Ukranian?" he asked his translator quietly. The woman nodded, a polite smile plastered to her face. "Good. Tell the Hetman we will be in contact shortly. This meeting went as planned." He pulled out a cigarette and stood to his feet. While walking away, a match quivering in his fingers, he paused. "Don't tell her that last part".

The translator nodded again.

 The Turkish diplomat swung the doors out to the small balcony open and stepped out into warm, May evening, smoke streaming from his nostrils. The Sublime Porte would have be happy with this. He leaned heavily on the railing and stared at the city below him, rubbing his eyes again. 
 
 "Sick Man of Europe...fucking infidels" he growled. He spat the cigarette out into the night and it was swallowed by the darkness in seconds.