[img]https://i.imgur.com/9JhEpPh.png[/img]

"Man, there aren't any cute girls around here at all. Or anything, really! Why did I ever think this was a good idea?"

Ivas was only talking to himself as he wandered the wastes of Rzail, but since there was literally nothing else alive in this land, he might as well voice his thoughts aloud. Journeying to distant lands for glory and booty was only a good idea if there was actually any glory or booty to be found in the distant land, and it seemed like he had picked the short straw when it came to far away lands. This place was like a desert except instead of being hot, it stank like death everywhere. Ivas wasn't sure which kind of desert was worse, given that he'd never been to the hot kind anyways. He was just about to sit down and take a rest when he spied a human figure up ahead.... small, with long hair and a bulging chest.... aha! Finally!

[img]https://rs998.pbsrc.com/albums/af107/Beta-Maxis/AnimeZombieGirl_zpsab702274.jpg?w=280&h=210&fit=crop[/img]

"Oh [i]there[/i] you are! I mean, uhh, no, I haven't been stalking you or anything, I just mean that--"

Luckily the girl was far enough away that she could not hear what Ivas had blurted out, or so it seemed given her lack of reaction. He decided to just run closer instead of potentially embarrassing himself by ranting on.

"Man, I was starting to wonder if there was anyone else here! Say, what's up with your skin? Are you.... okay? I don't wanna be rude if it's like a personal condition, but--ouch! Hey, that hurts! Let my arm go! Ahh!!"

He smacked her wrist away with Edge's pommel, so hard that her hand fell right off!

"Omigosh, I'm so sorry!! I really didn't know my own strength! Just let me--"

"Urrrgghhh...."

"--woah, I know I hit your hand off, but no biting! Keep those teeth to yourself!"

The girl's aggression, unnatural strength, and failure to produce any speech beyond growls and groans (which were much too low in pitch for her apparent gender and age) were really starting to worry Ivas at this point, but he refused to judge her too quickly. His teachers in school had told him about the evils of racism--if he assumed this girl was a monster just because she spoke another language and had a different skin color, he'd be a bad person! Maybe biting people was just how people say hello in the native culture! Still, Ivas was pretty sure that he wasn't going to get anywhere with her at this rate. He snatched up the detached hand while giving her his best puppy dog eyes as an apology, which had no effect as she lunged clumsily for his jugular vein.

The boy dodged her freakishly wide mouth, accidentally tripping her in the process and causing her to faceplant into the sand.

"Grrrr...." she moaned, her unnatural voice muffled by a mouthful of earth.

"Ack! Sorry, sorry again, I promise that was an accident. I'm gonna find a cleric or something to put this back on you. And hopefully that can translate your growly language too! I swear I'm really a nice guy once you get to know me! I always respect women!"

He took off across the dead sands, halfway panicking since he really had no idea where to go or how to find anyone that could help. So far Ivas had definitely done more harm than good in this land, maybe he should have stayed with his own people and not tried to appropriate his culture into another one.... at the very least, though, he had to fix up the green girl somehow! In the far distance, a tall, tower-like object rose up from the ground, dark and foreboding. It was the only notable terrain feature anywhere at all that Ivas could see, so he made for it, praying to the gods that it marked some kind of village that he could trade with or something.