[@Burning Kitty]In this universe, Jedi tend to not accept children as apprentices until they are at least eight or nine.  The fact that you can make people be able to use the Force if you give them specific injections during puberty means that they can select "good" children to be Jedi instead of having to take small children.

Other than that minor thing, the rest is fine.  I'm not too familiar with the Madolorian civil war, but I can work with what you wrote.