One of the individuals at Mendax's table was a man with cheeseburgers for hands and chilidogs for feet, who had been examining his new scrumptiously delicious appendages rather than listening to poor old Mendax speak. That is, until the creepy old guy in a mask mentioned that there was "noo way back" or... something like that. Cheeseburger-hands-man simply started screaming at the top of his lungs, which were now two slices of pickle so his scream sounded less like a scream and... well... more like someone trying to gargle acid after just having inhaled some helium. As he screamed, or... gargle-squeaked I suppose, he wondered to what in the bazinga was going on here. [i]What the [s]hell[/s] bazinga is going on here?! Wait... why did I just censor [s]hell[/s] bazinga with bazinga?[/i] The chilidogfoot-man-with-cheeseburger-hands stopped his annoying screaming, and realized he shouldn't say such bad words.

"Maybe I shouldn't say such... hey, wait a second!" Said the pickle-lunged man, who's voice was too annoyingly squeaky and wet... wet [i]is[/i] a sound, right? You know what? I don't care, his voice was wet. Wait... now I'm off track, where was I? Hold on, let me reread my little fanfiction novel- I mean... let me remember now. Ah, yes! His voice was so annoyingly squeaky and wet that nobody else could understand him but me, which made him sad rather than angry, because nobody wanted to hear more screaming. 

But this man was indeed a fighter. A feisty sort, possibly due to the spicy salsa running through his veins, but he was also a thinker like the great Apollo! Or was that Apostle? Aristotle? Aeropostale? Arona? My Corona? I don't remember exactly, but what I do remember is that cheeseburger-hands-man-with-pickle-lungs-and-chilidog-feet was a thinker. Just like Hansel and Gretel when they had to get home after eating too much grilled buttered eel one night, but remembered they did not have a designated driver.

You know what? Maybe he wasn't so smart after all. Not only did he just mindlessly eat his hand while thinking about where he was, but he believed this all to be a dream. Laugh Out Loud, as the cool youths say, it's not a [i]DR[/i][u]e[/u][b]A[/b][s]M[/s]. Whoopsie tootsie, that was one doozy daffodil right there. Oh! Where [i]are[/i] my manners? I'm incredibly so- huh... I don't remember putting them on the top shelf, give me a second wood you?

 

 

 

 
 
 
 

Ah, there we are. Thanks for waiting.