[@Sync]

I think that your character will need some adjustments before he can be approved. Here are the points you'll need to address, in no specific order:

- Make the text more readable. There are quite a few grammar mistakes as well as typos, it makes your writing confusing to decipher. We don't require a high level of linguistic skills,however, more readability would be appreciated.

- There's no such thing as mana circuits (if that's what you meant by "man circuits") in this setting. Unless that's a very specific characteristic of your character's power it doesn't need to be mentioned.

- That personality section is unnecessary as well. For this RP, we'd prefer to see the characters personalities in action, rather than in their CSs. A matter of "show, don't tell". Using the Sample post to showcase your character's personality would be much more appreciated.

- We prefer if you do IC posts, as well as the Sample, in the 3rd person. 1st person posts are disorienting because of the change in perspective from a character to another as well as giving the false impression that your character was any degree of protagonist status when compared to the other PCs which is rather undesirable.

As soon as you have addressed those issues, the CS will be ready for a second round of evaluations.