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[center][img]https://vignette.wikia.nocookie.net/saintsrow/images/b/b4/Star_saints.png/revision/latest?cb=20120803021839[/img][/center]

[center][color=AC58FA][b]Level:[/b][/color] 2
[color=AC58FA][b]Day/Time:[/b][/color] Day 3 - Evening
[color=AC58FA][b]Location:[/b][/color] Forest of Skyrim to Stormcloak Fortress - Ulfric's Tent
[color=AC58FA][b]Tag:[/b][/color] [@Mattchstick][@DracoLunaris][@Zarkun][@Lugubrious]
[color=AC58FA][b]Word Count:[/b][/color] 912[/center]


Boss pointed a finger at Azura when she got mouthy. [color=AC58FA][b]“And no talking back young lady! Geez, what are you thirteen?”[/b][/color]

Her sass had only been the beginning for Robot Boy was next to turn on him over being butt-hurt about being called a robot. Boss brought his hands to his face and slid them up and back through his hair as he groaned. There was so much whining going on. He interjected when Vent had mentioned [i]megamerging[/i]:

[color=AC58FA][b]“Can you stop saying that? It sounds wrong. I don’t care what it really means. It just sounds like something from a bad porn. Just say transform.”[/b][/color]

He then frowned, his lips rolling back to reveal his teeth that were irritably grit. Throwing up his hands, Boss exploded, [color=AC58FA][b]“This isn’t a fantasy novel! What is wrong with you people? Is that really our strategy? We’re gonna compare this place to the fucking Never Ending Story? More like the Never Ending Bitchfest. Spare me. No one is going.”[/b][/color]

Boss then walked over to rest his arm on Ruben’s shoulder as he defended him. [color=AC58FA][b]“Hey, don’t attack my man, Ruben just because your Daddy never tucked you in at night!”[/b][/color]

He scowled at Vent’s back when he decided to walk away to follow Ulfric. Piper seemed to follow his lead.

[color=AC58FA][i]Thank God all the bitching is over[/i][/color], Boss thought as he dropped his arm and reassured the loyal soldier. [color=AC58FA][b]“Don’t you worry bro, I got your back. You’re a good soldier. The best there is. You tell’em!”[/b][/color]

Boss followed behind Vent and Piper for a few steps before he stopped and looked back at Ruben who seemed to be staring at him expectantly. He looked left and then right, and then back at Ruben before he waved him on. [color=AC58FA][b]“Uh…let’s go.”[/b][/color]

If Ruben decided to follow, then he would continue on quickly walking to catch up to the group and in time to overhear Captain Piper ask what was the way to the fortress. Boss raised his voice, pointing at the obvious Stormcloak fortress before them.

[color=AC58FA][b]“You mean that fortress right there?”[/b] he said sarcastically and with an amused grin. [color=AC58FA][i]These robots are dumb.[/i][/color]

[color=0072bc][b]“Stop being a dick. You’re supposed to be their leader,”[/b][/color] Kinzie spoke.

[color=AC58FA][b]“Hey, I’m like this with you guys. So what?”[/b][/color]

[color=0072bc][b]“They aren’t the Saints, Boss.”[/b][/color]

[color=AC58FA][b]“Yeah, you right. You right,”[/b][/color] he agreed. He then apologized to Piper, [color=AC58FA][b]“Sorry if I hurt your feelings…if you feel anything.”[/b][/color]

If Kinzie had been there, they would have seen her face palm. Boss only heard a loud clap on the other end.

As Ulfric explained they were going to be staying the night, Boss shot a hand up. [color=AC58FA][b]“I call top bunk!”[/b][/color] He kept his hand raised and grinned at the other heroes. He then dropped his hand and had to ask, [color=AC58FA][b]“Hey…you guys do co-ed here?”[/b][/color] He tried not to smile too perversely.

[color=0072bc][b]“I hope nobody has to sleep around you. You snore,”[/b][/color] Kinzie said.

[color=AC58FA][b]“I do not,”[/b][/color] said the Boss seemingly to no one.

He followed Ulfric into his tent and followed him around the fire pit to sit to his left. As Ulfric explained the crummy makeshift map, Boss was forcing his brain into overdrive trying to make out what the sticks meant, and the piece of charcoal that looked like it had a human face. He smirked at the thought and continued to frown hard at the Stormcloak’s creation. When Ulfric mentioned following the commander, Boss raised his hands, throwing up some gang signs before returning his hands to his lap. Ulfric then asked for their feedback.

Boss blinked, realizing that he was supposed to probably say some strategy shit. [color=AC58FA][i]Fuck, my mind’s drawin’ a blank. I don’t even understand what most of this shit is. One of those sticks looks like a burnt turd.[/i][/color] Raising a hand to his nose, Boss closed his eyes and sneezed: [color=AC58FA][b]KINZEHJHRAH![/b][/color]

[color=0072bc][b]“…You’re such an idiot,”[/b][/color] Kinzie muttered. She then sighed. [color=0072bc][b]“How many of there are you? Five? Six? Okay, so there are thirty guys working for the Frost Tusk guy and fifty for the little guy. So we may want to concentrate our fire power on either or. I recommend dividing the team into two groups. Since the princess is more of a support role, she seems the most flexible. She may be able to move between your two groups providing support. One team should take out the fifty guys and the other team should focus on Frost Tusk.”[/b][/color]

[color=AC58FA][b]“What about the wolf creature?”[/b][/color]

[color=0072bc][b]“I would avoid it for now. If it’s guarding a shrine, then it won’t leave its post. You can kill it later.”[/b][/color]

[color=AC58FA][b]“Got it,”[/b][/color] Boss clapped his hands together. [color=AC58FA][b]“Okay. Here’s the plan.”[/b][/color]

He leaned forward to rest his hands upon the soil-covered earth and pointed at the map:

[color=AC58FA][b]“All right; Spear Babe, Femme Bot, and the Power Ranger will go for the tiny bot dude with the fifty guys. Ruben and Ulfric will be with me, and we’ll take the teeth guy…uh…what about the 100 guys?”[/b][/color]

[color=0072bc][b]“Divide by 2…”[/b][/color]

[color=AC58FA][b]“…”[/b][/color]

Kinzie sighed. [color=0072bc][b]“Send fifty per group.”[/b][/color]

[color=AC58FA][b]“Fifty of Ulfric’s dudes will go with each of our groups. I think that’s more than enough firepower to rock this casbah. We’re gonna leave the wolf thing alone since it’s guarding the shrine. If it’s only guarding the shrine, then after we take out the other gods, we can join forces to kill it and get the Talos god’s blessing. Everyone agree?”[/b][/color]