Okay, so Brendon hadn’t [i]asked[/i] Ryan or Spencer if they minded that he and Spencer carry on with the same brand without them (mostly because he knew what the answer would be anyway), and he didn’t [i]ask[/i] Ryan if he could use his lyrics, but again- he stood by the belief that these weren’t just Ryan’s lyrics, he wrote them for a band, and if suddenly he wanted to pull the ‘I wrote them’ card, he was never much part of the band in the first place; and Brendon was under the impression the band had been equally all of theirs. Now Jon and Ryan were just doing something else. Brendon was perhaps a little salty, and driven by the bitterness that kind of grew from the surprise that Ryan didn’t seem all too torn up when Brendon ended it (not that he wanted anyone to be upset, but he felt a lot more pain than Ryan appeared to, and he liked to feel appreciated. Even by a newly-ex boyfriend). Luckily for Brendon and Spencer, they’d come across a new friend- Dallon- who would take Jon’s place as bassist. They had yet to find a lead guitarist, and Brendon was kind of having his own personal difficulties with that anyway. He didn’t know if he could stand somebody else playing beside him.

Now, Dallon was just a friend, but he could tell by the look on Ryan’s face that the way he left his role a mystery, it left some open questions. He was almost prompted to raise an eyebrow- did Ryan really think he’d be acting like this if he was exclusive with someone else- but then the look passed and Brendon relaxed, smiling easily again. Even though he seemed effortlessly put together and charming, Brendon’s heart was still aching. He silently cursed at his past self for ever ruining this just because of his childish issues with commitment that he couldn’t even find a viable root from which that grew. He did think about it maybe being a product of his religious parents, and the complications that came with that, but Brendon dismissed his own thoughts, convinced he was looking way too deep.

Anyway. Brendon was fully ready to go back on everything he said those months ago, because Ryan looked [i]so damn good[/i] and he realised, kind of belatedly, but with reluctant acceptance, that he was definitely still in love. Luckily, even tipsy him was able to keep that to himself- even if it was only prolonging the inevitable confession. Brendon decided he’d [i]probably[/i] have to keep his mouth busy with something other than talking if he was to keep his own dignity. He eyed Ryan’s mouth, then tore his gaze away and flashed him another, seemingly consistent, wide smile. Watching as Ryan brought his glass up to his lips, he was kind of stuck with what to say, because there were plenty of things in his head that the remaining slivers of common sense were holding onto like a vice. But Brendon was a pretty shameless person anyway- he tended to ignore common sense.

So, when he said something he definitely didn’t mean as a joke, for a few moments he just looked at Ryan, gauging his reaction, which was a small, forced laugh. To potentially save the situation, he followed it up with a half-assed ‘kidding’. He really, really wasn’t. And luckily, or not, depending on your viewpoint, Ryan knew that. [i]Are you, though? I mean, it wouldn’t be the first time.[/i] They made eye contact briefly, and Brendon’s breath caught in his throat, kind of astounded. He took a moment to recover, laughing slightly, but one of his hands was still playing with the inside of Ryan’s suit, looking down to watch his fingers and then up again to exhale. [b]”Hopefully not the last,”[/b] Was all he said, not even smiling, just kind of intense, looking up at him through his eyelashes because he was so [i]tall.[/i] Brendon was barely keeping it together.

[i]I didn’t know you had such a thing for tall guys.[/i] [b]“Lucky you,”[/b]Brendon responded immediately, but then smiled. [b]”Are you kidding? When I first met Dallon-”[/b] He dragged his eyes away briefly to turn and point him out on the other side of the room (luckily he hadn’t noticed Brendon with his ex, yet, and come to rescue him from being an idiot)- [b]“I had the hugest crush on him, mostly because he’s, like, 6’4.”[/b] Of course, not any more. Brendon, apparently, didn’t have the capacity to like other people when he was still in love with his ex. Who’d have thought.

[i]Glad you do, because I think you’re gorgeous.[/i] Enamoured, Brendon turned, stepping a little closer and looking up again. It would be so easy- and so hard- to just lean up and kiss him, even if he was, like, an inch taller, but Brendon miraculously excersised some form of willpower and just imagined it instead. It took him a few moments to formulate a reply, which was punctuated by one of his arms folding across his chest in a effort to keep his damn hands to himself. [b]“Nothing’s changed, then,”[/b] He said speculatively- referring to mutual attraction, Brendon’s affinity for tall guys, and the fact that he was definitely still and love and that feeling refused to go away.