In contrast, Brendon definitely knew that this was reality and not some wistful dream- he’d dreamt so many times, daydreamed even, about such a situation, that he recognised the feeling and the warmth and the ache in his heart was definitely happening during a waking moment. In his subconscious, everythiNG was vague and dreamlike and Brendon could only imagine concepts and not touch, or true sensation. This was engaging all of his senses- his sight, as he drank in both the sunset painting the skies and Ryan’s offensively beautiful eyes; his hearing, as he detected both slight breaths and the steady fall of rain; his tactile senses, as he met him constantly in kisses and rested hands at Ryan’s waist, hip, jaw, neck, hair; and obviously his sense of taste- his bandmate’s lips, he noticed distantly, were somewhat sweet; or he had just eaten too much candy and now all he could actually taste were the remnants of sugar. It was overwhelming, in a way, but also comforting. It was all overshadowed by a euphoric sensation that could only be described as [i]finally.[/i]

Because he was so distracted by the present, taking everything he could moment by moment, Brendon gave little thought about the long run. He tended to live in the moment, and at that moment, all he could think about was that he could get used to this. And he had plenty of time to. Ryan was talking, though, and managed to be patient enough not to immediately complain that he had gone moments without kissing him. Something about- dates? Brendon supposed they had been rather unconventional in their approach to the situation, and he kind of clicked his tongue absently, wondering what Ryan was getting at. Honestly, he just kind of said whatever his bandmate wanted to hear- he didn’t have the attention span for such a long discussion, and he would much prefer to go back to how they were a few moments ago. [i]Kissing.[/i] Though he was frustrated, somewhat, he did figure that if he took the delayed gratification route (as in, standing up and moving over into the cabin), it would be worth the wait for closeness again. So he brought them both up to stand. 

[i]That’s-[/i] Brendon raised his eyebrows expectantly, but not really. He knew he was being cringeworthy, but he was allowed to be; he’d just confessed his love, for God’s sake. [i]You’re sweet.[/i] Better. [b]”I know.”[/b] Brendon looked very pleased with himself, grinning almost crookedly. He watched as Ryan turned and leaned to pick up the journal, which Brendon honestly would’ve forgotten otherwise; though it wasn’t like he needed it- now the lyrics he had written were entangled with this memory, he’d never forget them anyway. [i]And I was thinking the same thing.  Why do you think I come out here so often?[/i] [b]“Because it’s kind of cramped and humid even when it’s freezing outside?”[/b] [i]Just more excuses to see you.[/i] Aw. Brendon felt himself melt a little, following his bandmate as he backed up towards the cabin door, out of the rain, and took the journal from his hands when it was offered to him. 

[i]So you wouldn’t mind- I mean.[/i] Brendon almost frowned, because he’d been moments away from kissing him again, and silently asked Ryan whether he was always this bad at taking hints. Either way, he semi-patiently heard him out. [i]We could call eachother boyfriends, right? Imagine that.[/i] Immediately upon the mention of the word ‘boyfriend’, Brendon was entertaining the concept. His boyfriend, Ryan. He played with the label in his head, and decided he was... [i]more[/i] than happy to use it. His easy smile kind of betrayed that before he even answered. [i]This is Spencer, this is Jon, and my boyfriend, Brendon...[/i] [b]”You’re so awkward. I love you. And, yes, you can call me your boyfriend. Fuckin’ obviously.” [/b]Smiling faintly , he closed his eyes when Ryan leaned in to press a kiss against the corner of his mouth, basking in the attention.

Then, upon the realisation that their time outside watching the dwindling sunset was over, he mourned it briefly, knowing that the evening would be one he could recall for the rest of his life, and frustrated he couldn’t experience it again. He’d give anything to rewind to beginning and experience the cocktail of emotions and sweet kisses again, but instead he had to stand by the front door, wondering what the hell they’d say to Spencer and Jon. [i]So you were saying something about dates in our rooms, and i’d really appreciate  around seventeen blankets right now. Shall we?[/i] Laughing softly, he rested his forehead against Ryan’s shoulder, savouring the contact and their possible last moments alone until they were receiving suspicious looks from the rest of the band. [b]”That’s not what I meant,”[/b] He pointed out, vaguely amused, but nodded enthusiastically all the same. [b]”Lead the way.”[/b]