[@Raddum]Are you sure? I just did some comments for your character. But it's your choice. These things tend to thin out after a while, so you are welcome back at that time, if you so wish. I'll include my comments for your character, anyway.

[hr]
A note on the ‘Command’ virtue for everyone. Decide if your character already has a following or not. If they do, you can mention who these people are, briefly, in the profile section of the character sheet. Or, alternatively, your character can recruit followers in the story. This is something that you as the player do yourself whenever there is an opportunity for it. Think of them as your own non-player characters.

[@Torack]
I have some questions about the disadvantages and advantages that might help you to expand on them a little bit. 

What happens in his nightmares? How does the persecution express itself? What is the depression like on a ‘bad’ day? Is the ‘bad reputation’ connected to his sins or something else? What kind of slimy things is he afraid of—some examples? How skilled is he with sword and shield—how did he learn? Which languages can he speak, and how well? What kind of wealth does he possess?

You technically get 26 points due to the +1 in violence for having a male character. You can remove the rules for distributing points. I’ve also fixed the links for the headers in the character sheet. Please revisit it and remove the punctuation from [img.]

You put 6 points into Command. Does Hondem already have followers or will he recruit them in the story?

Lastly, would you like an edited version of your character picture? It will be the same style as other pictures in the OOC.

[@MegaOscarPwn]
Could you add a little to how Fernando’s pride and lust expressed themselves? Concrete examples, besides what you wrote for the profile.

Has he ever killed someone through dueling? A detail that could be added to that part of the advantages list. Does Fernando have followers due to the 4 points in Command, or will he recruit them in the story?

You can remove the rules for distributing points. I’ve also fixed the links for the headers in the character sheet. Please revisit it and remove the punctuation from [img.]

Lastly, would you like an edited version of your character picture? It will be the same style as other pictures in the OOC.







[@Raddum]
I’ve fixed the links for the headers in the character sheet. Please revisit it and remove the punctuation from [img.]

Kretch certainly has a lot to atone for. 

Can you include examples of what triggers his wrath?
You mention that his mind is ‘easily attacked’—attacked by what? Insults? Occult influence?
About not handling people well—is it that he is awkward with conversation?

You can remove the rules for distributing points.

Lastly, would you like an edited version of your character picture? It will be the same style as other pictures in the OOC.

[@TsarDev]
You can remove the disadvantage/advantage parentheses. Also, revisit the character sheet template. I’ve fixed the links for the headers. Just remove the punctuation from the [img.] tag.

What kind of scarred appearance is it? How do people react to it?
What happened to the injured knee? What kind of limitations does it impose?
What are the waking nightmares like? What happens in them?
Which kinds of weapons are included in his knowledge of ranged and small melee?
Is it just animal tracking? Can he track humans? Can he track beasts of the purgatory?

Would you like an edited version of your character picture? It will be the same style as other pictures in the OOC.

[@Ashen One]
Great picture. I have that one saved myself.

Could one say that the murder was based on wrath? Or some other sin? Many things lead to murder.

What does his brother say in his mind? Does he mock? Incite guilt?
What triggers his rage?
Nyctophobia in a world where day only lasts a few hours? Better bring torches and lanterns! What happens to him in the dark, exactly?

Add another point in violence, as it’s a male character. Does Galeren have all of his followers at the beginning or will they be recruited in the story?

Would you like an edited version of your character picture? It will be the same style as other pictures in the OOC.

[@Dusty]
Very poetic. Does Corbric already have a following or will he recruit them in the story? Perhaps some old members of the Papal Guard are still with him? Other than that, I have no other comment. Although, I’ve fixed the links for the headers in the character sheet. You can revisit it, if you want and just remove the punctuation from the [img.] tag.