It's not like Ryan anticipated a truly in-depth discussion on their relationship, but with the amount of reassurance he needed, it must've seemed that way. He didn't want to hear reasons for the split or anything, and he didn't really want to talk about his own feelings on the matter beyond 'I missed you.' Rather, Ryan was trying to lock in the premise of them meeting again - and soon. Being surface-level honest, making certain they were on the same page, made it seem more definite, in his mind. But he knew to quickly condense his thoughts into the basics, even moreso when his impatience with himself levelled with Brendon's. Ryan's half-assed effort to ignore Brendon deliberately urging him on, pressing his hips closer, was failing him; his expression changed quickly, simultaneously caught off-guard and determined all the same. 

The tactic apparently worked, though, because it was moments later that he really got to the point, and Brendon's response was probably going to play in his head on loop for-fucking-ever. He was dragged back in to virtually the same feelings he had when he first saw Brendon, or when they were at the cabin, and all he could do was reminisce on the scenario. For the former he mostly was just obsessed with the image of Brendon singing his lyrics perfectly, or the sight of him by the tour bus, flushed from the energy expenditure but beautiful in the calm of evening around them. In the latter: seeing Brendon from afar, consumed by writing, so peaceful in his surreal surroundings before he realised Ryan had come outside; or, more obviously, how he sounded when he said '[i]I think I'm in love with you,[/i]' vaguely anxious like there was even a slight possibility Ryan might not reciprocate. And now, as if taking a mental snapshot, he committed to memory how everything seemed to just slow down at the simple words '[i]I've never been so sure of something in my life,[/i]' how it felt to breathe again.

He had a brief internal struggle, knowing he wanted to be close to Brendon again and cover as much area as he could but unsure where to [i]start,[/i] and his hands quickly seemed to decide for him. He held onto Brendon's with one of them for a few fulfilling moments until Brendon's hands were occupied at his hips, and, okay, yeah, that was a better idea. There was enough of a wait between his switch from Brendon's lips to his neck, apparently, for Brendon to be on the verge of complaint, but luckily Ryan was no longer on a time-wasting vendetta. In fact, he was so nice that he didn't even laugh all smugly when Brendon was immediately responsive, his breathing hitched for a split second. [i]You’re fucking- evil.[/i] Ryan smoothed a hand flat over the small of Brendon's back, almost protectively keeping him close, and hoped that maybe time would be cool and just stop for a while.

[b]"Am I,"[/b] he asked flatly although he'd definitely meant it to be a question, mostly filling the time while he pulled away to examine his work. Maybe he shouldn't embarrass Brendon [i]too[/i] much - one would probably do. The hand cradling Brendon's head shifted low enough for him to run his thumb over the red-purple skin, and it was sorta funny juxtaposed with his bowtie, full tux getup. Except for the fact that when he looked at Brendon in general it suddenly really wasn't funny at all. He tried not to look too enamoured when Brendon's hands slipped over his waist, then ended up securing around him against the counter, because the intimacy - especially after a near-completely empty period - was so welcomed. And Ryan was maybe a little overly romantic about it all once his 'evil' practices were ignored; he kept opting for whatever position was closest to an embrace when he could, drew comforting circles with his thumb wherever his hands landed.

[i]I missed [/i]this, [i]too.[/i] Oh, an understatement. Ryan's immediate response was to briskly nod, sounding breathless even when only a short amount of time had passed. Helpless to what was now just a reflex to him, Ryan gave in to the urge to kiss him again, more chaste. [b]"You're always better at it,"[/b] he reflected, and then grinned. [b]"I tend to talk too much."[/b] What was an admission to him knowing full well that he'd made them wait unnecessarily long also served to toy with Brendon, just throwing more pauses in. Because he didn't have an unlimited supply of self-control, though, Ryan placed a trail of kisses along his cheekbone, up to his temple, slowing down as the feeling that they needed to rush through it dissipated. Still - maybe it'd be more appropriate to hurry given the circumstances, but Ryan had successfully shut off his brain for once.