[i]Easier?[/i] Well, yeah. Brendon went through about fifteen different moods a day at lightning speed- so if at one moment, like right then, the morning after sleeping with his employee, he was feeling a certain way, it was hardly likely he’d be in the same mood at his date in the evening. And that was the only reason Brendon went on dates; he always asked the questions, dodged questions that were too personal that were aimed at him, and always took them back to his apartment and never agreed to go back to theirs (he felt more comfortable on familiar ground). There was that, and keeping his parents relatively happy about his non-existent ‘love’ life. He knew his mother thought he just needed someone- more specifically, a woman- to level him out, mellow him a little. Brendon neither wanted anything serious, nor did he really want anything of that nature with a woman. Still, he was only just beginning to come to that conscious realisation, so in the meantime he took out anyone who was pretty and thought he was pretty.

[b]”Easier,”[/b] He confirmed, raising an eyebrow as if daring him to question it. Anyway, it wasn’t like that hadn’t been paired with a compliment. [i]Guess you’re right. I was here, like, twenty minutes at most, before.[/i] Brendon was amused by his admittance and didn’t even smirk. [b]”It took me less than twenty minutes to seduce you. It took five minutes or less of flirting to get you quite easily into my bed,” [/b] He argued anyway, stepping closer to the mirror after he turned away and examining the lilac shadows under his eyes. Frowning, he carded a hand through his hair and rolled his shoulders back in a shrug, straightening his spine, before turning on his heels to absently watch Ryan redress. Disappointing, he silently mused, he had plenty of time this morning. [i]Shy? I’ll remind you[/i] I [i]was the top.[/i] Instantly, that coaxed a slightly indignant laugh, and he almost stepped backwards, surprised by his brazenness. Of course, he wasn’t wrong, but would Brendon ever admit it outside the situation itself? No. [b]”Yeah, Whatever. You did [i]that[/i] time.”[/b] That sounded like a promise, but it was empty, and Ryan probably knew it. He smiled like there was some kind of in-joke.

Apparently Ryan was having a streak of boldness, as moments later the taller man had cleared the space between them and what reached out to attempt to fix the problem that was ruining Brendon’s morning. His hair, that refused to cooperate. The contact stunned him and he had to root himself in the ground to stop himself from moving smartly backwards- instead, he just remained still, and issued a half-warning, half-flirt. To his surprise, Ryan did tug firmly on a few loose strands, and Brendon had to stop himself leaning in closer. [i]Happy? I’ll do better later.[/i] He hoped that wasn’t an empty promise. [i]Besides, I fixed it. You look cute.[/i] Brendon scoffed, turning back towards the mirror and examining his hair. Huh. Not bad. Maybe he’d have to employ Ryan also as his hairstylist. Still, he didn’t appreciate the ‘cute’- so he made no response save a steely silence that hopefully spoke volumes.

Funny how, after Ryan asked about it, Brendon started talking and he acted all disinterested. Brendon saw through him and rolled his eyes, but kept talking anyway. [i]Privilege.[/i] [b]”Yes. It’s an even more exclusive list than ‘people who have seen me naked’, or ‘people who know my middle name’. Saying that, the first one is actually not that exclusive.”[/b] Offhand self-depreciation was his speciality, apparently, and he laughed, at his own expense. [b]”You’ll be on two out of three of those lists. No, I’m not telling you my middle name.”[/b] When he turned back, Ryan was still standing close, and Brendon was annoyed by the height difference between them and how he had to look up when Ryan spoke to him- but saying that, when Ryan tilted his chin up, he had to quell the urge to kiss him. Stupid and senseless, he told himself- unjustified. Don’t be an idiot, Brendon. ‘Don’t get jealous’, [i]my-[/i] What? What was Ryan saying? That he wasn’t jealous, or that he was? Brendon honestly wasn’t sure which he’d prefer.

[i]Okay, but you don’t have to keep giving yourself away.[/i] What? That was a change of tune, and Brendon didn’t like it. His eyes darkened- what gave him the right? He wanted to push him backwards, move him the hell away, but he held his ground. [b]”Give myself [i]away?[/i] I’m not a fucking nun, asshole! Nor have I ever been anybody’s fuckin’ property.”[/b] [i]It’s not safe, first of all, and you’ve clearlt deprived yourself of emotional connection...[/i] That he had heard before. [b]”Save it. Jesus, what is it with you people? Has it ever occurred to any of you that maybe I don’t want or need an ‘emotional connection’?”[/b] Well, he did, everyone did, but Brendon was stubborn to the end and to back up his argument he’d lie about whatever he pleased. [i]And, yeah, deprived yourself. If you let anyone in then you’d know that you’re- that you’re worth caring about, I guess. And not just [/i]enough to go around.

Brendon couldn’t believe what he was hearing. It had taken, what, five minutes to undermine this guy’s apparent ‘morals’, five minutes for this guy to readily sleep with him, and now he was lecturing him about the safety and morality of his personal, intimate life that had nothing to do with him? And lecturing him about his personal connections? Brendon was furious, and he stepped back, completely affronted and out for blood. [b]”Holy shit, you’re the biggest fucking hypocrite I’ve ever met,”[/b] He marvelled, looking him disdainfully up and down. [b]”It’s not [i]safe?[/i] I shouldn’t [i]give myself away?[/i] What are you, a priest? Oh, and it’s funny how you only say that [i]after[/i] you had sex with me. It’s only relevant when I don’t want you any more. You should know me well enough that-“[/b] He paused, dragging his hands down his face and turning his back on Ryan. [b]”-that I don’t- I [i]can’t[/i]- make connections that easily. I thought you understood that. I pretty much raised myself, Ryan, I think I’m fine on my own.”[/b]

[i]Shit, I’ll go. I’m sorry.[/i] That was the first good decision Ryan has made this morning. Brendon said nothing. He looked hurt, because that’s what he was, above all; he had trusted Ryan not to judge him and here he was, saying exactly what he thought. He was just like everyone else- thought Brendon was hedonistic and superficial and incapable of caring about other people. This is why he tried not to in the first place. [i]Fire me, or whatever. I just wanted to say that to you, once.[/i] Brendon shook his head, at a loss, still angry and upset and simultaneously wanting Ryan to leave him the fuck alone and wanting him to grovel at his damn feet. [b]”[i]Why?[/i]”[/b]