[sub][sub][sub]yes this is late stfu[/sub][/sub][/sub] [center][img]https://txt-dynamic.static.1001fonts.net/txt/dHRmLjcyLjAwMDAwMC5TR1Z5YjJWeklGSmxZbTl5YmcsLC4x/badaboom-bb.regular.png[/img] [b]DIRECTED BY: BLACKSTRIPE, BLAZION, AND ALFHEDIL STARRING: BLACKSTRIPE AS KAREN HERNANDEZ/LADY ARCANA AND BILLY JOHNSON/DEMON SEED BLAZION AS ZOEY KASIMIR/GRIM AND JOSHUA CHRISTOPHE/DEMON ALFHEDIL AS RAYMOND VON LUNEBURG AND VERA VALINOVA/VELOCITY CRAZYTAZER AS JUDAS AND GIRARD BABCOCK/TANK BLUETOMMY AS HARRIS HERTUG/VINE STALKER, WILHELM SILBER/IRON EAGLE, ROBERT WOJOWNIK/BANG, AND SHAMS AL'HARASA/ALIAS KORKOA AS JESSIE BEEDLE/LIGHTNING BUG, ANARKEE, KING ORIN/AQUAMAN, AND SPECIAL GUEST APPEARANCE AS SINESTRO PYROMAN AS PRESTON WESTFIELD/EMERALD KNIGHT AND PATRICIA 'PAT' PALIMO/APEX SIR LURKSALOT AS MALCOLM TALHAIARN/WATCHDOG SIMPLE UNICYCLE AS OSCAR ELLISON/THE QUESTION AND DAVID KASIMIR/BLACKSTAR AFRO SAMURAI AS MARVIN HAYES/THE TIGER AND INTRODUCING LEGION X51 AS KATARINA 'KAT' VON RYSECH/THE RED COUNTESS AND POKEMAD1 AS ARNOLD RENE/RALLY IN MEMORIAM: CETA DE CLOYES AS EZRA LO/ECHO, THOMAS TOOMBS/HEX, AND KASSANDER 'KASSAN' MARKOS/PROTEUS ASTRALGEMINI AS JACQUELINE 'JACK' BLAKE/BLACKJACK THE WHACKO AS CLAYTON TOOMBS TAYTAY AS IRA REEVES/RENEGADE AND ZALIM NAN MARKOS/BETA DRAGONOFTHEWEST AS JOHN RIZZO/SUPERMAN CU CHULAINN AS JAMES 'JIMMY' CHONG/CELERITY HAGRODEN AS SHAWN J. STUBBE HOLY SOLDIER AS ROLAND COOK/SWARM DBLADE26 AS TIMOTHY MCCLELLAN/KID ETERNITY AND BRUCE PHOENIX CLANJOS AS SHOUSEI KOUGAMI/LORD DEATH MAN PLEEK AS BANE MOONMAN AS BLACK MANTA ZERO HEX AS DESMOND DORRANCE/KING SNAKE AND DORIAN VON JELEK/THE PALE COUNT AND DESCARTES AS LEX LUTHOR WRITTEN BY: A BUNCH OF MONKEYS WITH A TYPEWRITER PRODUCED BY: HARVEY WEINSTEIN SCORE BY: LUNATICS AND MADMEN CATERING BY: WU-TANG CLAN FILMED ON LOCATION... YES, EVEN THE PARTS IN HADES COSTUMES PROVIDED BY: YOUR MOM (SHE'S A NICE PERSON, GIVE HER A CALL SOMETIME) I'M GONNA PRETEND LIKE THERE'S MORE STUFF HERE SO HOW ARE YOU? GOOD TO HEAR I'M PRETTY GOOD TOO I WASTED LIKE HALF AN HOUR WRITING ALL THIS SHIT SO YOU KNOW WHY ARE YOU HERE? SERIOUSLY THE RP'S OVER GO HOME THERE'S NO AFTER CREDITS SCENE NOT JOKING GO AWAY ... OKAY MAYBE THERE IS To Be Continued...[/b] [hider=... Don't these kinda things have post-credits scenes?]Of all the ways Malcolm had thought he was going to spend Christmas morning... this probably wasn't one of them- Seated there, in his tiny kevlar suit and flak-vest, absolutely caked in bits of steadily drying ant-person, his foster-brother to his right, the mouthguard of his helmet to his left and an infamous psychopath carving up a double-cheese pepperoni pizza with a stuffed crust to his front. ...And also some kinda shiny crystal stick leaning up against the wall in the corner. With an old, half-gutted Sony Watchman crudely bound to it with electrical tape, still playing reruns of Mr. Rogers' Neighbourhood over it's tiny black and white screen and broken speakers. Because that was a thing that happened today, he couldn't avoid remembering as his glowing eyes lingered on the crude contraption of magic and spite that may well have just saved the whole goddamn planet, that [i]actually fucking transpired.[/i] The Goddess of Misery and Discord had been unceremoniously booted into another dimension by everyone's favourite blonde, magical jailbait while flailing and shrieking incoherently about old men in cardigans. [i][b]Yes. This is a thing that actually happened.[/b][/i] For a moment, no sound escaped him as his apparently mighty wit still struggled with processing the sheer enormity of the pants-on-head insanity that was the past three hours until finally... [color=orangered]"How the [i]hell[/i] did that work?"[/color] David, who was currently more worried about making sure none of the bits of antfolk the trio were covered in got into his Coke or, God forbid, onto the pizza, shrugged at his foster-brother's question, the gesture making the paper bag over his head jostle slightly. [color=black][b]"Honestly, it's just... It's best not to question these things."[/b][/color] [color=2E2C2C]'... Pffft, he's wearing a bag over his head.'[/color] The older brother honestly felt a little bad for the staff at the Pizza Hut who, no doubt, were practically pissing in their pants behind the counter. Here they were, two vigilantes and a well-known terrorist covered in blood and pieces of monster, striding right into the store and having a quick bite to eat. It was a good thing the food got here so fast, so they could get out of the restuarant faster... Actually, he was pretty sure Anarkee was the reason it came so quickly, considering she was well known for bringing the hammer down on anyone she didn't like. Literally. [color=black][b]"... Do you think mom's gonna be pissed that we completely totalled the Grimmobile plowing it through all those ant guys?"[/b][/color] [color=9e0b0f]"Well I for one, thought that was a hell of a lot of fun!"[/color] The pale-faced terrorist said, grabbing two more slices of pizza and stacking them like bread on a sandwich. [color=9e0b0f]"Though I still say we should have gone somewhere else to eat, Ray's place has way better pizza and he doesn't try to call the police every time I walk through the door. Good guy, Ray. Seriously though, this was fun! We should kick ass together more often."[/color] At this, David quirked an eyebrow. [color=black][b]"... You [i]do[/i] remember that Ray's was absolutely destroyed when we went there, right?"[/b][/color] The teenager paused at Anarkee's desire to 'kick ass together more often'. [color=black][b]"I mean, hey, you keep this up then you might be bumped down to Public Enemy #2. At least then we wouldn't have to try and lock you up."[/b][/color] Anarkee paused at the mention of the destroyed pizzeria, frowning at the thought. [color=9e0b0f]"Oh right... Where the hell am I gonna get pizza from until he rebuilds? Damn it, I'm going to have to rely on Chinese food, aren't I? Gonna have to go halfway across town to get the good stuff, and then haul it back to my place through the streets with your mother and you guys after me the whole time, I have to eat too you know!"[/color] Anarkee said sullenly. [color=orangered]"You could maybe... try [i]cooking?[/i]"[/color] Mal offered with an almost apologetic shrug and awakward smile, not necessarily knowing [i]what[/i] to tell this woman in condolence. [color=orangered]"I mean, shit, I've lived off trash and cooked rat for most of my life, I'm sure you'll think of something."[/color] Truth be told, this was Mal's first time actually meeting a [i]real[/i] 'Supervillain' and not just some knifey goon. And here they were eating goddamn pizza after saving the world, instead of brawling it out dramatically as most logic wuld denote they should be. He was a bit outta his element. Anarkee waved a dismissive hand towards Malcom, now talking around a mouthful of pizza. [color=9e0b0f]"Tried it. Hated it. Cannibalized the stove for spare parts to build this beauty."[/color] She said, slinging a hand over the massive hammer leaning against the table. [color=9e0b0f]"If it comes down to cooking or eating trash, I'll take trash any day. Hell, sometimes you find fries or half a burger or something, and then I didn't have to cook it!"[/color] She said proudly, grinning at the two young boys. It was a very disconcerting smile. The young, former trash-diver was unmoved at this, instead cracking a wee smile of his own. [i]He happened to be an expert on this topic.[/i] [color=orangered]"Actually, what'cha [i]wanna[/i] do is raid the bins behind donut shops.[/color] The tiny mass-murdering vigilante started, just a bit [i]too[/i] enthusiastically for someone talking about dumpster diving [color=orangered]"Anything they don't sell, they just chuck at the end of the day. It's a fuckin' [i]goldmine![/i]"[/color] [color=9e0b0f]"Also grocery stores with a deli or a meat market."[/color] Anarkee said nonchallantly, picking some pepperoni off the pizza at the center of the table and adding it to her own slices. [color=9e0b0f]"Same deal, anything they've prepared but haven't sold gets chucked out."[/color] Her expression darkened for a moment as she stared at her pizza. [color=9e0b0f]"The amount of goddamn waste in this country is freaking disgusting. people who are out on the streets have to dive for it like animals when it could just get donated, but noooooo. Instead the goddamn government tells us we have to throw it all out, who cares about the poor and homeless, right? Fuckers..."[/color] For a moment after that, there was quiet, the only sound being Dave munching slowly on his pizza. [color=black][b]"... Well, uh, this got awkward real fast."[/b][/color] Anarkee perked up and grinned at the pair of young heroes. [color=9e0b0f]"Oh! Speaking of awkward![/color] She leaned forward conspiratorally and motioned for the boys to do the same. [color=9e0b0f]"If you tell your mother where I get pizza from, I will not hesitate to hunt you down and bash your head in with my hammer."[/color] The younger of the brothers just kept chewing through his slice of oily, cheesy goodness without a care in the world at that statement, almost looking somewhat [i]offended[/i] if anything at the notion of betraying and attacking the pale anarchist where she pretty much [i]lived.[/i] ...Which had nothing to do with the fact that he actually [i]did[/i] have a hell of a lot of fun today, fighting monsters alongside a lunatic with a rockethammer. Who, as it turns out, was absolutely [i]hilarious.[/i] No siree. [color=orangered]"We just might've saved the fuckin' planet today, us three."[/color] He stated, or at least [i]tried[/i] to through a mouthful of pizza and cola [color=orangered]"I'm pretty sure we owe ya the right to eat goddamn pizza in peace."[/color] The older, for his part, tried not to look too terrified at the casual threat. Then again, the bag covering his face probably helped with that. Having recovered as his brother swore the duo wouldn't betray the anarchist's trust, he nodded along. [color=black][b]"Right. I mean, it's the least we could do after you helped us out."[/b][/color] That damn smile was back on the lunatic's face now as she leaned back in her chai, tearing off a bit of pizza crust with her teeth. [color=9e0b0f]"Good! We have an accord then! You know boys, I think this is the start of a beautiful friendship! ... We should start a gang."[/color] [color=orangered]"...The hell's an 'accord'?"[/color] the smaller boy's glowing eyes blinked in confusion under his visor for a second [color=orangered]"...Is that dessert or something?"[/color] It took David a few blinks to process what Anarkee had just said. [color=black][b]"... A gang? Okay, we're friends, but we're not gonna help you start a [i]gang[/i]."[/b][/color] He then turned to his brother. [color=black][b]"It's like... An agreement, I think. But dessert sounds pretty damn good right about now."[/b][/color] [color=orangered]"Then why not just call it a fuckin' [i]agreement...[/i]"[/color] the Watchdog just started to mutter under his breath but dropped the topic quickly as- [color=9e0b0f]"Garcon!"[/color] Anarkee called out, turning towards the kitchen where the employees were cowering. [color=9e0b0f]"A batch of your finest cookie cake thingies! And Oreos, if you have them!"[/color] [/hider] [b][sup][sup]Copyright Blackstripe RPs 2017-2018[/sup][/sup][/b][/center]