[center][img]https://i.imgur.com/ytkEruw.png?1[/img][/center]
[h3][center][color=816dad]Flying Saucer, Blue Fields Park[/color][/center][/h3]
[hr]

[center][b][color=816dad]"Jeez louise, it's chilly!"[/color][/b][/center]

Andrei stepped off the ramp that rose from the ground below and into the UFO interior. Behind him, the ramp folded up to become part of the floor, sealing the cabin with a [i]hiss.[/i] [color=816dad]"The boundary field's up, but I'm not going out there again without a sweater!"[/color] As he spoke, he walked, and he reacclimatized to the heated indoor air of the ship. His words were undercut by the occasional [i]beep[/i] from the control panel and the constant [i]hummmm[/i] of the saucer's core.

[color=fff7c6]"I could go get you one, but the townspeople would probably beat me to death before I made it to the store."[/color] The metal chair at the other end of the cabin spun around, revealing a human skeleton.

...No, that wasn't right. The eye sockets that should have been holes into an empty skull were instead indentations about half an inch deep, painted black. The joints of its limbs were very obviously artificial, and from the left side, the screws that held it together could all be seen.

Moreover, a price tag hung from its ribcage.

[color=fff7c6]"Mind you, they could only kill me because I don't have a-"[/color]

[color=816dad]"If I get you a gun, you're not gonna be using it to attack random townspeople"[/color] Andrei could see the sentient halloween decoration's trigger finger twitching restlessly. What kind of wraith had he stuck inside those plastic bones?

[color=fff7c6]"Right. Yes, sir. As long as we're hiding here, I'm sure I won't be in a shootout anyway."[/color]

They were parked on a small island at the center of a duck pond that was bereft of ducks. It had a pair of benches, a small plaque built into the ground explaining how a tree had been planted in someone's memory, and a white bridge that led to the bulk of the park. Thanks to Andrei's efforts from a moment ago, civilians would not notice the large metal disc dominating the island, and any who tried to go there would suddenly decide to enjoy a lovely day somewhere else.

[color=816dad]"Still, just because it's a good hiding place doesn't mean it's not pretty lame."[/color] Andrei threw himself down onto a couch. The entire surrounding area seemed to hold traces of ancient and advanced technology, but had been largely converted into a modern-day living space. [color=816dad]"But I'm stuck indoors because of this icy Montana weather!"[/color]

[color=fff7c6]"I think it's normal for this area and time of year."[/color] With Morgan sitting in a chair next to the couch while Andrei lay down, the situation looked like some kind of joke about a psychiatrist.

[color=816dad]"Good point, Boney Bob!"[/color]

[color=fff7c6]"It's Agent Morgan."[/color]

[color=816dad]"That's a stupid name."[/color]

[color=fff7c6]"You came up with it [i]literally[/i] six days ago!"[/color]

[color=816dad]"...Whatever. If everyone around here was expecting it to be this cold, maybe we could fly around until we see some people with coats on, then with the tractor beam..."[/color]

[color=fff7c6]"Why don't you just summon your Servant and have them get you a sweater?"[/color]

A look of supreme realization appeared on Andrei's face. [color=816dad]"Oh, yeah. Good point."[/color]

[hr]
He was a quick worker once he got started, so in fifteen minutes, the complex circle for the summoning ritual had been drawn in bright red paint on the UFO floor.

[color=fff7c6]"You think the air recycler is gonna filter out those fumes?[/color] Agent Morgan commented idly from his position splayed out on the pile of furniture that had been moved to make space for the ritual.

[color=816dad]"I mean it's super high tech, so probably, right?"[/color] Andrei sniffed the air, which seemed, if anything, less paint-scented than when he had first opened the can. Probably a good sign. [color=816dad]"Okay! Boney- um, Agent Morgan! Please step outside!"[/color]

[color=fff7c6]"Can I ask why, first?"[/color]

[color=816dad]"Servants are heroes, after all!"[/color] Andrei started speaking as though he would have said the same thing even if the skeleton had made to walk silently outside. [color=816dad]"And any self-respecting hero would attack a low-level monster like a skeleton on sight! With that in mind, I'll explain your situation to them, and then you can come in!"[/color]

[color=fff7c6]"I'll ignore that you just called the way you very intentionally made me 'my situation', but is that really true about heroes?"[/color] He was lowering the ramp to head outside either way. It wasn't like he could disobey the captain's orders, after all.

[color=816dad]"I dunno. It made sense in my head."[/color]

The skeleton was already outside.

As the ramp raised itself back into the floor, the three landing legs of the UFO also folded in. There was a slight [i]thump[/i] as the full weight of the saucer landed on the well-kept park grass, connecting to the land.

With the [i]hiss[/i] of the cabin being sealed, Andrei turned to the circle. Now that he had caught a whiff of outside air, the paint fume smell was a lot more noticeable, but he was still pretty sure it was getting filtered out.

He took a deep breath, and began the incantation-

[center][h2][color=816dad]"Abracadabra!"[/color][/h2][/center]

Nothing happened.

The magical energy did not react, and command seals were nowhere to be found.

Andrei sighed.

[color=816dad]"Grail. Have you every heard of the Rule of Threes?"[/color]

A slight reaction. The circle began to glow.

[color=816dad]"It means that if I have to say something three times, I'll be very disappointed!"[/color]

With a slight burning sensation, some sort of bruise began to appear on his hand.

[color=816dad]"I know you've got your magic words you like to hear when people summon Servants, but it's important to try new things! Understand?!"[/color]

Light began to pour forth from the circle.

[center][b][color=816dad]"With that in mind-"[/color][/b][/center]

[center]The light became blinding.[/center]

[center][h1][color=816dad][u][b]"ABRA-KA-FUCKING-DABRA!"[/b][/u][/color][/h1][/center]

[center]The cabin was completely filled with a wave of steam. Always a sign of good things.[/center]

[center]Hopefully the air recycler would filter it out.[/center]

[center][@floodtalon][/center]