If your going to demand people approach RPs a certain way then you are absolutely going to foreclose options. 

As for not socializing, go write a novel if you are so allergic to personal interaction.

Group RPs are much more unreliable than 1x1s but even there you need to buy into other peoples visions or incorporate those visions into your own, that is the nature of collaboration. Even so about 70 percent of my RPs die in the planning stage because it becomes obvious that we are interested in different things.

Don't be too prescriptive in you interest checks. Its a turn off to feel like your partner already has everything nailed down and you are just along for the ride.

Finally with regards to RPs dying due to half hearted posting, active communication can help but some days or weeks people arent feeling it and its work just to get a reply of any kind up. That has to be accepted if you want to write with people long term.

I don't use the discord and I still have 3 or 4 rps which have been satisfying over the long term and my interests are fairly niche. Kiss the frogs.