Congratulations to my Six Selected Sickos. 
I hope we all have a beautifully ash-choked time together out in the strangling vines and ravenous apes. 

Before we begin, I need to introduce you all to certain things you can always do in your posts to trigger specific responses from me, the GM. 

[h3][b]OPEN YOUR BRAIN[/b][/h3]
You may always open your brain to the psychic maelstrom to receive hidden knowledge and secrets. Think of it as a sort of "acquire random meta-information" card. Obviously, don't do it every damn post, because the more you do it, the less specific and the more random-as-fuck the information becomes, until it's so esoteric as to be useless. for Weird characters, you may occasionally do this for no reason, because I said you did. 
Congrats.

[h3][b]READ A SITUATION/PERSON[/b][/h3]
You can always read a situation or a person to pick up on details I may have failed to mention. When you do, just ask the question your character wants answered in BOLD. If it's too specific, I can't guarantee you'll get much info. Broader questions that can be answered vaguely will get you better answers, ironically. 

[h3][b]LOVE LETTERS[/b][/h3]
Sometimes, I will PM you a Love Letter. It will usually contain a shitty set of choices. You're welcome. Tell me what you want most and it will happen. You may never get one. You may get one regularly. Depends where you are, what you're doing, when you're going to arrive, why you care, who you're fucking, and how you taste. You know, the good shit. 

[h3][b]IN CASE OF MURDER, BREAK GLASS[/b][/h3]
I expect us all to play nicely... kinda. For the most part, conflict can be figured out via a general agreement to not be shitty about it. If you feel that an element of randomization is needed, I will roll dice about it. 2d6, with a +2 for anyone who seems to have an advantage in the situation. (So like if Pepsi decides to beat the shit out of Milk, he's gonna get the +2 because he's real good at killing. But he might not get that against Alcohol. Meanwhile, if Milk has seduced Pepsi and is about to stab him at the height of their passion, then she gets the advantage. Get it? Good.)
on a 10+, things will go well for you.
on a 7-9 things will go pretty good, but it will cost you.
on a 6 and under, shit will go wrong. 

Those apply before comparing generalized victory. It is possible to do a better job of kicking ass than the other person, while also having some really fucking awful shit go down. 

BUT! We may never use this. It's just, ya know, available as a quick-and-dirty conflict resolving tool. 
No crying if it doesn't work out for you. You know what you signed up for. 

[h3][b]THE END[/b][/h3]
The RP ends when we're pretty sure the storyline has reached a natural conclusion. 
No, seriously, that's it. When we all feel like yeah, we've gotten there, that's when we call it. We'll do some epilogues and whatnot and that will be that. I'm in this to see what happens. I have no plot ready, just bad shit going down EVERYWHERE. 

So... good luck, chucklefucks!