It wasn't a total [i]shock,[/i] or anything, because Ryan had at least a cent of faith in their relationship, to say the least, but the fact that Brendon's reaction was a stunning, showstopping, shy smile and not a complete 180 in mood almost decimated Ryan. It was a fucking [i]relief,[/i] but at the same time, exactly what he'd expected in the back of his mind. Expected or not, Ryan was the luckiest motherfucker alive. [i]You just officially made that the best sex I’ve ever had.[/i] Ryan laughed, cutting himself off only to kiss Brendon as deeply as he could in the briefest of moments, wishing he wasn't so rushed on trying to get words out so he could draw that time out. [i]Hey, it worked for me.[/i] Ryan smiled weakly, because, sure, he thought that [i]now,[/i] but he was getting another proposal whether he liked it or not and it would be goddamn perfect. Not this mess, for sure. They touched all the time, attached at the hip, and yet the dance of Brendon's fingertips over his skin was electrifying. [i]And at least it wasn’t cliché, right?[/i] Ryan sighed at himself, his ridiculousness, and bumped his head back against the headboard in defeat. [b]"I [i]suppose,[/i]"[/b] he said dramatically, before raising his head again and smiling at Brendon. 

Ryan followed Brendon's grip to his hand, realizing only then that all of his fingers still adorned a stupid amount of rings. He rolled his eyes, already guessing the answer he was going to get. [i]You’ve got enough, I think.[/i] He smirked, ignored [i]that,[/i] continued on his own train of thought as if there'd been no teasing to think of. [b]"Engraved. They'll match."[/b] His smile was small, private, watching Brendon's face and then the kiss he planted on the back of his hand. Again. So fucking lucky. Hand free, he switched it around, took Brendon's in his own and replaced a ring from his to place on Brendon's delicately. [b]"Here's a placeholder, for now."[/b] He turned his hand over once, and though it wasn't much, just a plain band, he liked the idea already. Brendon in a ring he'd given to him. Asked in public, answering 'I'm engaged,' so on. Fuck, when Ryan got one, he'd abandon all the others; he was ready to ramble about Brendon more than he already did. And he'd get invitations to do so. Even better.

He was stuck in his thoughts when Brendon ground down against him, and he dropped his hand with surprising speed, pursing his lips to suppress any real reaction. He cleared his throat as Brendon spoke, unsettled. [i]So, I’ll think about it.[/i] Jerk. Ryan lost his breath when Brendon caught his lip between his teeth, tilted his head obediently with the guidance from his hand. 'kay, maybe he was a little versatile. [i]If you propose to me again, in a different position.[/i] Ryan nodded his head to the side, practically dizzy, until he could kiss him proper, nose brushing his cheek. [b]"Hm, maybe later,"[/b] he teased back, barely a centimeter from his lips. [b]"I've got a headache."[/b] The furthest thing from true, because Ryan felt pretty much weightless (despite the weight of Brendon, all over him, comfortable), but he thought he was funny sometimes. Enamoured, he rested both hands behind Brendon's ears, cradling his head and tilting back just to study him for a moment. This was it. This was the man he was going to marry. His wonderful weirdo. He exhaled on a smile, wishing he could communicate through just a look exactly how sickeningly in love with him he was, because he certainly couldn't do it with words - and that was his craft, his gift. 

Ryan lowered his hands, let them settle around Brendon again, just holding him secure. Honestly, he felt like fucking thanking him, like he was some lost soul that'd been saved. Maybe that was a little true, even. He didn't want to wait to propose again, didn't want to wait to get married, he wanted to do it here and [i]now,[/i] but the last time he'd jumped the gun like that - maybe twenty, thirty minutes ago, give or take - he'd sorta messed up the moment he dreamed of almost nightly. So he ignored the impulse to elope. [b]"I'm gonna do it again, you know. Second take. You won't have a [i]clue[/i]. Totally gonna blow this proposal out of the water so you don't get to tell anyone about it."[/b] He regarded Brendon very seriously. Hard to do, given the circumstances. [b]"Which you're not allowed to do, by the way. This is seriously not the grand gesture I had in mind. I'm gonna blow your [i]mind,[/i] baby."[/b] Maybe he was hyping this up a little too much. Maybe not - he'd go to the ends of the Earth for this idiot.

About telling anyone. Ryan was sort of worried about that. Spencer had taken something of a liking to him, because with time, he realized Brendon was actually in this for real, not just a sideshow - but that didn't mean they were best friends. Six months wasn't enough for Ryan's life to not be in danger if Spencer learned he'd proposed on the spot. His management, they'd be pissed about his image changing, not that he was much of a 'player' but he looked at least unattainable, in a way, and marriage made him definitey unattainable in a practical sense but it wasn't sellable. Plus that whole 'unprofessional' part, but Ryan had kind of worked them off of that edge over time. And the [i]fans...[/i] he saw the critical response enough, the whole articles about Brendon, nitpicking and wondering if he was in it for the money, for the fifteen minutes (six months, come on) of fame, for anything but actual love and dedication. Brendon rarely said a single thing about it, but Ryan was sure if he was in his position he'd be bothered by the treatment, by the public eye that he didn't sign up for. Sure, there was a sliver of positivity, like when his work was recognized or he got caught in an interview beside Ryan at awards shows and it captured his personality or people just thought he was as gorgeous as Ryan did. Whatever the case, it was a delicate balance between obscene, unfounded amounts of disapproval and celebrity-level adoration and acceptance. 

It wasn't all that fair. Five minutes in to confirming their engagement, Ryan wanted to announce it to the world, and he was worried about the impact it'd have on his fiancé.