Well I can't say they've influenced you for the better - I can see the direction that you're taking because of it, and frankly, your writing feels disconnected from the rest of the RP:

     For starters, your mechanics feel stiff and unnatural, made all the worse by Socorro needing to be given a solid emotional connection in order for the reader to care about his otherwise lackluster motives. [u]If I break the flow of the action.[/u] [u]By splitting a sentence too early instead of fleshing it out and leading into the next.[/u] [u]It hurts the reader's immersion in my story and my characters.[/u] Now obviously I'm no expert in this field, I'm practically a novice myself what with the ease with in which I lose interest in what I'm writing, the at-times strange grammatical decisions I make in trying new angles, or my simple inability to write more than a paragraph at a time before having to press the enter key and move on to the next line. Yet despite all that, I'm at least trying to make the flow of my stories feel immersive - I want you to imagine you're THERE, in the thick of it, observing craft and character alike in Real Time...and static writing doesn't give you that immersion.

     Next...your character, man; Now yes, drama comes in many forms, but I think it's fair to say that as with any craft you really ought to grow past the basics beyond a certain point - and Socorro is as basic as they come. He's a cut-and-dry stereotypical JRPG youth with a dark and/or mysterious past, a strange feeling that he doesn't fit in and/or is hated by all ([i]probably because the only emotions available to that type of character are angst, fear and apathy[/i]), and an overwhelming power that comes at the tragic price of bum-all. To top it off he's subject to the errors of Tell, Don't Show - exposition and internal monologues ram backstory into scenarios in which it has no right to be, and they take away from the other forms of development your character could be engaging in ([i]talking with other characters via natural dialogue, showing through action/inaction, describing through allusion or subtle comparison[/i]). 

     Finally, in keeping with the terms of an immersive atmosphere, your style of writing seems to push everything else BUT your character to the background - and that's especially antagonizing BECAUSE he has nothing interesting to say or feel. This is an RP, and while every character has their own role to play, the general idea is for the players to work together in order to create an interesting, collaborative story. Socorro's role here mainly seems to be exposing/progressing a bland backstory in order to...focus on him; That's it, that's his ultimate role in the story - self-inflation. Yullar isn't exactly a saving grace, but at least his self-centered, carefree, battle-loving nature (and subsequent death...[s]Spoiler[/s]) is supposed to be a symbolic and short-term bit of foreshadowing for the plot, in addition to progressing it through its first stages in the battle atop Krolm's Anvil.

As you can tell, I feel pretty damned serious about this...but with all that said and done, I'd actually like to continue to progress this setting and sharpen my skills through this RP, because I still think it can work - but I can't justify continuing it as two separate stories trying to merge into one. So the question that arises here is, "Can you change for the better on this?"