Crow listened intently as Penelope began to explain what had happened after Layth had left. As she mentioned the painkiller, everything began to make more sense. He vaguely remembered her telling him that it was potent and that it would make him delirious when he took it. Having experienced it now, he supposed he had drastically underestimated just how delirious would make him. It felt strange to have to be told about things he’d said and did that he had no memory of.

As Penelope told him what he’d said to Gavin and Olivia, the thief reddened in embarrassment. While it was true that he [i]did[/i] like them, his newfound thoughts and feelings towards the two knights were things he was still coming to term with, himself. He hadn’t wanted them to know that he looked at them differently now. Being guarded about in inner workings of his mind, he preferred to keep such changes of opinion private and slowly integrate alterations to his behavior that would be less likely for others to notice. That way, no attention would be drawn to the fact that he’d changed his mind about something. Was it Immature? Perhaps, but that didn’t change the fact that he didn’t feel comfortable letting anyone else into his thoughts like this.

He continued to listen in horror as Penelope went on to explain about how Olivia had decided to take advantage of his delirium by getting him to tell her his secrets. Knowing that she’d managed to get his real name out of him—something he had kept locked up so deeply—it made him deeply uncomfortable to find out that she’d tried to do such a thing. This was a different kind of vulnerability he hadn’t been expecting. It was clear that when he’d been intoxicated by the medicine, he’d had no control over what he’d said to her, so [i]everything[/i] had been on the table. He shuddered to think what else the knight could have learned about him.

So, when Penelope told him that his name was the only thing Olivia had gotten out of him, Crow relaxed a little. He was still upset to learn that he’d said his real name in front of two people he’d had no intention of ever telling it to—he guessed Gavin had probably still been present at the time too—but he supposed the knight’s little ‘game’ could have gone much worse. The two could have learned about the details of his past that he hadn’t shared with anyone besides Penelope, or they could have found out he was the bastard son of the current king. He didn’t want anyone to know either of those things, so losing the privacy of his real name had been a small price to pay to keep those deeper secrets secret.

However, it seemed there was something Penelope had been keeping from him as Olivia piped up that she’d skipped a question. The thief held his breath, worried that there really [i]had[/i] been something he’d said that’d had more consequences than his real name. He held Olivia’s gaze as the knight explained that he’d confessed his plans to marry Penelope both two years ago and after the war. While the latter wasn’t as worrying—he and Penelope had already discussed their intentions with each other—he hadn’t wanted her to know about his plan back then. It wasn’t anything personal. He just didn’t want to add to the guilt he knew she already felt for leaving him behind in the past.

Crow brought his free hand to cover his face, which, by now, was scarlet with humiliation, and groaned in a voice that was muffled by his palm, “Oh [i]gods[/i], I can’t believe I said all that.” He glanced towards Penelope with a grimace. “I know Hazel gave you more of that stuff for my pain, but next time, could you just do me a favor and hit me over the head with a mace instead? I honestly think I’d prefer it.”