[@Kuro] Alright I didn't actually plan for him to be a bad guy. I wanted to do an anti-dark magic dark magician but I really didn't want him to be too edgy like a vampire hunting vampire so I might have gone too hard into morally ambiguous comic relief to downplay how edgy it was. I personally don't see straight up bad guys doing well in any RP thread even when one follows the evil PC rule of always work with/for the party and do whatever makes them happy, at least I don't see myself being able to pull it off at all. Edited my sheet and will wait for the second review but bullet points of what I at least TRIED. INCREDIBLY minor changes [list] [*] Was drunk/dumb at the time, meant letter of introduction but that's basically the same. Changed it but I'm pretty sure it doesn't matter. [*] Changed the 'hidden tower of magic' to just 'the tower of magic'. At the time I kind of wanted something like the hidden school of magic from craft sequence/choice of deathless in name at least. In practice I wanted it to be an incredibly neutral secret society where mages can conduct research away from politics or major powers in seclusion but send in agents every now and again when things look bad. Removed it since this might have made the backstory more complicated and it added in a random hidden political power. It's just a normal college now. [*] Made Jack weak to Boba tea, Minty Tea and Lemon pastries. [*] Fixed formatting and header, I think? [*] Changed the quote to Jack Admiring wight blades [*] Changed doctor's bag to bonesaw. He just needs the bonesaw, not the doctor's bag. [/list] Actual Character Changes [list] [*] Tried to make Jack less morally apathetic, and more magically obsessed. [*] Attempted to give reason to Jack's obsession with dark magic. Partially his obsession with magic as a whole but largely in an effort to counter said dark magic in the future by studying it. The analogy I gave were doctors studying viruses and diseases. [*] Gave him a weakness of not wanting to use high leveled necromantic spells out in the field. I want to say because he's afraid how people would react and it might be basically the reason but at the same time that feels kinda edgy to me so I just focused on 'it's dangerous'. [*] Changed 'learner' to rituals expert. Skill focuses on the identification, execution and defusion of magical rituals in general. Focused on this aspect to get him into the order as a useful member. [*] Expanded on the necromancy skill, specifically wrote it with a focus on identifying and countering both high-level undead and high-level necromancy spells. Unlikely to blatantly use flashy and obviously necromantic actions [*] Barely changed the backstory, would just like to highlight that the whole reason he's on the frontline is specifically to write his thesis on anti dark magic and how to fight the dark army if he still feels like a bad guy. If he does still seem like a bad guy I really would like suggestions, if possible, on how to fix him. Maybe it's just Jack of Knives being the picture? [/list] I figured when it comes to countering dark magic the choices are Demonology, Hex Magic and Necromancy since they'd be the most common in a dark army filled with Demons, Orcs and Undead. I picked necromancy since I thought it was the coolest, I'm even more wary of demons than Undead and I feel like Hex Magic would come up least.