[b][u]Review of Garen Zi:[/u][/b]
[b]1. Grammar and Formatting.[/b]
[u]Imperial Personnel Files section:[/u] get the section contents out of the headers, remove excess line breaks.
[u]Appearance:[/u] "His hands are that of a laborer's", → His hands are like those of a laborer
‘Calloused on the knuckles’ → callused knuckles
[u]Achievements section:[/u] using The Force → using the Force
[u]Interview:[/u] smaller numbers are typically spelled out. Only when you go above 101 or so do you start using numerals.
The [i]Recording[/i] passages would probably look better as quotes than as hiders.

[b]2. Immersion violations.[/b]
Tribal tattoo, is that not Earthly in origin? How does this tie into the Followers of Palawa?


[b]3. The Force.[/b]
We’re largely avoiding the topic of Midi-chlorians in the PG, due to the fact that some people hate the idea of them. Additionally, they’re not really known to the Jedi Order yet, with them using other means for identifying Force-sensitives. We suggest simply saying his strength in the force is above average.

His innate talent can be for Breath Control, not hibernation trance, as the latter is a highly advanced form of the former.
Nice to see a sheet that hasn’t gone over-the-top on training level… however, he does seem to have a lot of innate talents. Might be wise to change a few of those to just training. Currently two-thirds of his techniques are talents.

Certain things like precognition fall in under basic training for all trained force-sensitives, even if it is just to improve reflexes. Considering his near-mastery of a form of martial arts, he would almost certainly have trained this. Anything related to acrobatics/athletics are techniques likely to fall in under his Teräs Käsi training. To maintain the balance of skills, we suggest reducing Force Throw to a more basic level. 

[b]4. Other skills.[/b]
Can he fly ships? Pilot any vehicles? Is he a good shot? Can he slice computer systems? Cook nerf steaks? Sew? etc.

[b]5. Combat experience and training.[/b]
Since the Followers of Palawa train especially to counter Jedi, we would imagine that he has at least a basic understanding of most forms, albeit most likely focused towards countering them, rather than using them himself.

As mentioned by another GM, we’d also recommend that you reduce his level of success somewhat, spice it up with a bit of failure and some stand-offs where neither side succeeded. Give him some events he had to learn from to become better. Perhaps the sources for some of his scars.

Additionally, his history of being three-times world-champion by the age of eighteen is a bit implausible… But rather than cut it down further in duration, we have an alternate suggestion: Bring in age brackets. Make him the best in his age group and perhaps have him have proved himself better than people in the bracket above too. It is not all that likely for someone of the age he was to have beaten everyone of all ages three years in a row at a martial arts. Raw talent can only compensate for so much real experience. He’ll still be pretty badass, and he’ll have more room to grow.

Why did he only reluctantly study form III?

[b]6. Politics & Associates.[/b]
What sort of person is his master in the Empire? Is it one that avoid politics too, or is it one that takes care of that stuff for his/her apprentices?

Has he met any of the other Sith? Any of the non-Sith?

[b]7. Ownerships.[/b]
Those gauntlets? Overpowered. Ridiculously so.
You can have gauntlets covered in cortosis weave, but you need express permission from GMs for pure cortosis, as that is extremely rare to see. It is not something that would be given to a mere apprentice for a minor achievement like lightsaber training. The gauntlets you described would be worth a fortune.

Replace them with just plain old cortosis weave, and it’ll be fine with the reasoning provided.

[b]8. Personality.[/b]
Mercy isn’t unheard of in the Empire. Some Sith favor it less than others, but the empire as a whole is relatively fair. Harsh at times, but still fair. Once someone has served the punishment for his or her crime, it is all water under the bridge.

He is slow to anger. Does he stay angry long? Does he forgive people easily?

[b]9. Flaws.[/b]
Any major skill ranges he’s severely lacking in training in?
If under a politically skilled master, an apprentice can actually rise fairly high without delving into it him/herself, but will always be at risk of someone outmaneuvering him/her later, or losing opportunities anyone seeking to rise above apprentice must have political influence, though. Good flaw, though.

How does he feel about imperial law and justice? Does he work with it? Around it? Does he break it? Has his behavior here reflected poorly on his master?

[b]10. Interview.[/b]
As mentioned earlier, midi-chlorian-testing isn’t common. Only the Empire runs with mandatory testing of force-sensitivity for everyone, but even they use alternate (but unspecified) means.
Also as mentioned by other GM(s), he would almost certainly have been known as a Force-sensitive, but with Bunduki being far outside both imperial and republic space, would naturally not have been picked up by either order as a child. 

They (presumably) have some sort of tradition for training their Force-sensitives, but it is probably more limited than that practiced by the Jedi or the Sith. We imagine that it would tie heavily into how to counter Jedi.

Indoctrination of Jedi hate would most likely start even earlier. Sure, young children don’t fully understand the hows and whys, but they are far more susceptible because of this. Especially considering the nature of the offense. It is not altogether unlike how young Sith are taught about the Sith Genocide.

Why did he express interest in leaving Bunduki? Was it encouraged? Discouraged?

Are the reasons behind the abandonment something you intend explore IC?

Nice to see an example of someone successfully fighting an asymmetrical battle against lightsaber while keeping it mostly balanced.

Suggestion: rather than simply have the Sith approaching at random… How about Garen verbally mistaking his opponent for a Jedi, then have the Sith offer to teach him even more about fighting Jedi? Perhaps also have some limited use of the Force pop up to really make the Sith interested?
How is his mental fortitude (resisting telepathic influence)? Would a Sith’s subtle use of such be likely to be effective?

Would he have noticed the Sith Lord?

Also, while tatooine is not near the front lines of the war (its pretty far from them) pretty much the whole known galaxy knows of the war. What are his views on it? How does he feel about the Sith as a group?

[b]11. Other.[/b]
Your failures mention a political mission to Kamino. What sort of mission would that have been? They’re even now rather isolationist and outside both imperial and republic territories.