[quote=@Spiritblitz]
<Snipped quote by souleaterfan320>

*a jagged metal hand comes out of my my back and flicks your forehead*
Not with that attitude. Don’t let your past actions get to you, make yourself better. We all do thing we dislike, you are not the only one Shinji. Its how we continue on and take a step forward that matters.
[/quote]

... It's far more complicated than you think. Its not just this event thats got me like this. Theres so much terror and death and shock that has done this damage to me. I most likely won't fully recover.