[centre][img]https://fontmeme.com/permalink/190726/acae620c1b6643671569d55ea5dcfa82.png[/img]

[color=lightpink]Kim huffed when Emi [i]finally[/i] let go. God, that may have lasted for only a couple minutes but it may as well have been an eternity. She rolled her shoulders, scooting an inch away from Emi as she launched into a conversation with AJ. Despite being disgruntled at Emi's unexpected contact moments before, her concern spiked as AJ lead her friend away. The Gearhead's presence didn't seem to be inciting anymore breakdowns, but Kim wasn't sure how long Emi's current weird emotional high would last.

She looked on as they left, then turned away, shaking her head. Emi would be fine.  

'[b]Their loss[/b],' she said to Sami, shrugging. '[b]What kind of story you got in mind?[/b]'

Most everyone seemed to be off doing their own things, she'd noticed. The air seemed lighter, the atmosphere almost passing as cheery, even, as conversation filled the space, whispers and murmurs alike. Val seemed buzzed about something, chattering excitably with Jules. At least she didn't seem pissed anymore.

Her messenger bag hadn't stopped buzzing since she'd stuffed her phone in it. The near constant vibration was rather irritating; she placed her hand on the bag, making to shift it against the log she was sitting on, away from her side. Then she paused, considering.

The buzzing [i]was[/i] constant. Someone was calling her, not sending texts one after the other. She sighed. Her fingers clenched, twisting the bag straps in their grip. The buzzing continued, disapproving.

'[b]Ah, sorry, I've gotta take this call first.[/b]' The apologetic smile was easy to slip on, her fingers relaxing as she took out her phone, careful to point the screen towards herself. '[b]I'll be right back.[/b]'

It wasn't hard to slip away from the campfire, looking to all the world as if she was taking a call from a friend. Neutrality was an expression she'd mastered, exuding false flippancy in her movements. Perhaps a little too false - her steps felt too calm, her grip on her phone too lax. None of it synced up with her rapidly beating heart and her dry mouth.

The back of the cabins was dark, dimly lit by the starscape above and light peeking through the cabin windows. Someone had left the lights on.

Kim stared down at her phone, took a breath, then accepted the call.

'[b]Hey, mum[/b],' she said.

The response was immediate. '[color=crimson][i][b]Where are you, Kimberly? Why aren't you answering my texts?[/b][/i][/color]'

'[b]Red Rock Canyon. Didn't I already text you that?[/b]'

'[color=crimson][b][i]You're still there? Please don't tell me you're staying the night.[/i][/b][/color]'

'[b]...[/b]'

'[color=crimson][i][b]Kimberly.[/b][/i][/color]' A frustrated sigh. Then, a muttered, '[color=crimson][b][i]I knew this was a bad idea.[/i][/b][/color]' Kim tensed but before she could respond, her mum continued, louder. Firmer. '[color=crimson][b][i]Look, I know I let you go on this trip, but I was expecting you to be more responsible than this.[/i][/b][/color]'

'[b]I'm not the one who crashed the RV, mum.[/b]'

'[color=crimson][b][i]That too. I've got half a mind to talk to your friend about responsible driving-[/i][/b][/color]'

'[b][i]Mum.[/i] Don't drag him into this. He drove fine, someone else crashed into us.[/b]'

'[color=crimson][b][i]Drag him into this? You did that when you brought up this trip, Kimberly. I'm glad you're safe, but of all the places you could have stayed at, you chose Red Rock Canyon? Cabins in the middle of who knows where? What were you thinking?![/i][/b][/color]'

'[i]I was thinking we'd have a normal camping detour like normal teenagers do[/i],' was what Kim wanted to say, but she held her tongue. She could point out how they were only getting anywhere because of the Gearheads in the first place, or how there really wasn't anything wrong with camping at Red Rock Canyon. She could argue that her mum was being irrational, angry for reasons that only existed in her own mind. She was safe, nothing bad had happened, and they were all fine.

She did not say any of these things.

'[color=crimson][b][i]Well?[/i][/b][/color]'

What was she thinking? She hadn't been. Not really. They were all fine. With or without her. She'd come on this trip, expecting to find something in herself that didn't exist. There was nothing deeper to be found in Kimberly Beveridge, no layers to peel back, no hidden potential to dig out. She was what she was - an average teenager with no valid interests that could possibly carry her higher in life.

There was just no changing that.

'[b]This trip really upsets you, doesn't it?[/b]' she said.

'[color=crimson][b][i]Of course it does! My only daughter travelling so far away from home. Do you know how worried I get? Not to mention you're spending time you could be using to prepare for college. You should make the most of this time to grow your skills and plan for the future![/i][/b][/color]'

Grow. What a joke.

'[b]I'll...go home, then.[/b]'

'[color=crimson][b][i]What?[/i][/b][/color]' Why did her mum sound surprised? The least she could do was act happy that her daughter was finally listening. '[color=crimson][b][i]Now? Are you sure?[/i][/b][/color]'

'[b]I'll wait till we get to Las Vegas, then I'll book a flight. I-you're right. This trip wasn't a good idea. I'll be home soon enough.[/b]' Kim spoke with a calmness she didn't feel, her heart clenching in her chest. Somewhere in there, a voice told her that this was ridiculous - she'd already come so far, why was she turning back now? Their adventure had barely begun!

'[i]And it can continue without me[/i],' her mind responded. Its tone was droll, dispassionate, and its voice was what Kim listened to. '[i]There's nothing here for me and nothing I have to give.[/i]'

It only made sense.

'[color=crimson][b][i]I'm glad you're finally listening to sense[/i][/b][/color],' sighed her mum. '[color=crimson][b][i]Call me then, okay? Let me know when you're flying off.[/i][/b][/color]'

'[b]I will[/b],' said Kim, '[b]Bye.[/b]'

She ended the call without waiting for a response.[/color]

[hr]
[color=lightpink]The rest of the evening passed with Kim on autopilot. She listened to Sami's story, engaged in the occasional conversation, and through it all, her calm, relaxed attitude itched at her like a mask that didn't fit. She never mentioned her leave; she didn't know how to. What was she supposed to say? '[i]Hey guys, I feel insecure about coming along on this trip so I'm turning a 180 and heading home[/i]'? They weren't exactly in Santa Monica any more. This wasn't something easily dismissed.

'[i]Understatement of the year. This is your last trip with them, genius.[/i]'

Now, in bed, the news still lingered behind her lips, yet to leave. She lay on her back, staring up at the ceiling in the dark. This wasn't good. She couldn't just leave out of the blue tomorrow. The others would have questions and she wouldn't be able to answer them, not without spilling everything she'd worked to keep close to her chest all these years. 

Could she sneak off? No, that wouldn't be fair to them. She huffed, turning onto her side. Someone had to know. She couldn't keep quiet about this forever, not if she was set on leaving. Her fingers brushed against hard plastic beside her pillow. She frowned, contemplating. Then she wrapped her fingers around her phone, got off the bed, and left the cabin. 

The outside was no more darker than it had been earlier but without the light of the campfire and friendly conversation, the air felt colder. Kim leaned against the wall of Sami's cabin, next to its door.

It took a good five minutes of staring at Sami's contact name on her screen before she actually made a move. Shutting her eyes, she released a harsh exhale. Then, she typed.

[quote]you awake?[/quote]
[quote]sorry to disturb. I'm outside. There's smtg I need to tell you.[/quote]
[quote]if you're sleeping, don't respond.[/quote]

Almost immediately after sending the last one, Kim resisted the urge to smack herself. '[i]Real smooth, Kim.[/i]'[/color]

It had been a long day, there had been fights, fucks and fungus (just where did those Mushrooms come from?) but Sami’s head was feeling a little clearer now than it had been all day. He had taken to a small cabin to end the night, he was lucky or unlucky enough to have a place all to himself for the evening. This worked out fine for him as it would leave him to plot and plan for their sojourn into the lions den of Las Vegas. This was going to be the make or break moment for their group, they had to win big in the city of sin or this whole thing would be for nothing. Exercising had always been a great way for Sam to get into his own head and sort through the nonsense that was his life. As the sweat poured down his semi naked self, he noted in the corner of his eye a light flashing. Pulling himself to his feet from his push up position, the Cubans wandered over to the little bed side table where he had left his phone and glanced down at a new message; it was from Kim. All of a sudden his clear mind was cloudy once more as a thousand thoughts ran through it. He quickly grabbed a small towel to wipe away the sweat and stepped out of the cabin door, into the cool desert moonlight and in front of his friend Kim.

[color=olive]”You want to leave, don’t you?”[/color]

[color=lightpink]Kim raised her eyebrows, not moving from where she leaned against the wall. Her gaze flicked down Sami's bare torso, then returned to his eyes. He looked tired, but it seemed to be more from exertion than exhaustion. In the dim light, Kim could hardly make out the bruising on his face or his expression. His tone seemed resigned.

In a moment of sudden self-consciousness, Kim was acutely aware of how she was alone with Sami. In the dark. She wished she'd thought to put on her denim jacket. With just her sleeveless wool top, she felt bare.

'[b]That obvious, huh? How'd you guess?[/b]'[/color]

[color=olive]”You’re one of my best friends, I can tell when something isn’t right. Besides, this late in the day, it doesn’t take a genius to work out either you’re after a booty call or you have a major problem”[/color] Sami leaned back against the wall next to her and sighed. [color=olive]”You know, I had this feeling, Kimmy that something just wasn’t clicking for you, pretty much ever since we left Santa Monica. I know I should’ve approached it sooner but with the accident and trying to salvage this trip that I completely neglected you and I’m sorry for that”[/color] the latin lover repented as he gazed out across the campsite. [color=olive]”I don’t need to know details of you don’t want to share them. First thing tomorrow, we’ll rent a car and I’ll take you to the airport, it’ll be quicker than driving back”[/color]

[color=lightpink]'[b]Don't be sorry[/b],' said Kim, '[b]It's not your fault.[/b]'

She nodded to his suggestion. That would be that, then. She would leave and not look back. They would part ways, unsure of what the future held for them.

The wind blew gently. The chill of the night seeped into her skin. She suppressed a shiver, crossing her arms. The heat that had chaffed uncomfortably in the daytime had no place in night's cool blanket.

Part ways, huh?

The silence stretching out between them was beginning to teeter on the edge of vague discomfort. She opened her mouth, ready to admit to everything she'd kept inside from the moment she'd gotten to know him. The way her heart fluttered when his kind eyes saw her. The quiet moments she savoured when they could just be [i]them[/i] and not think about anything else.

'[b]I'll see you tomorrow, then[/b],' she said. Then, '[b]Thanks.[/b]'[/color]

[hr]
[color=lightpink]With all her practice, she thought it'd be easy. Acting like all was right with the world while her reality was all sorts of [i]not[/i]. Easy peasy. Except this wasn't quite the same as all the other times. This was, most likely, the very last time she'd have the chance to put up this facade in front of this group of people. Her friends.

How strange that this should be her first time not wanting to pretend either.

The morning was hard. Whatever she said to Em, Val, Jules, Nate, or Umbra felt stiff and foreign leaving her mouth and any enquiries on her wellness she deflected with a dismissive shake of her head. She was acting oddly, she knew, but she couldn't bring herself to tell them all she was leaving. Telling them would mean explanations and she knew Val would drag it out of her if she wanted to. And explaining everything right before leaving? Laying herself bare, letting them see the nothing that she was and would forever be? She couldn't do that. If this was going to be her last memories of them, she wanted it to be of them happy, in their own little ways.

It didn't change the fact it still felt like she was walking on eggshells every minute.

When it was finally just her and Sami again, on the way to the airport, relief rode through her. She wasn't sure what exactly he'd told them, but she was certain he hadn't said that she was leaving. Had he? Who knew? The others sure hadn't acted differently.

'[i]That's because it wouldn't matter if you were there or not.[/i]'

The ride to the airport was quiet. Comfortably so. It was...familiar. The comfortable atmosphere quelled the unease in her middle more than the lights of Vegas ever could. But it couldn't last forever. Soon, she found herself staring at the hustle and bustle of the airport, just ahead. The taxi's engine rumbled behind where she stood. Her grip tightened on her suitcase handle.

She turned to Sami, flashing a smile that didn't reach her eyes.

'[i]I should tell him.[/i]'

She stuck her hand out. Fondness, the first genuine feeling she'd felt all morning, crawled into her chest.

'[b]Till we meet again.[/b]'[/color]

[color=olive]”Go ride those silver wings. I’ll be seeing you soon, Kimi”[/color] Little did either know, Sami would never make it back after this trip.[/centre]