[center][h1][color=plum]Laurien[/color][/h1][/center] [sub]Moments after Li’Kalla came. Weeks before she prays to Shengshi[/sub] [hr] She ran through the jungle, tears blurring her vision as she scowled. Orvus called after her, but she did not look back, she didn’t want to. She had been a fool, a lovestricken fool. To believe that Silver would somehow live on in Li’Kalla… Then to meet that… [i]Thing[/i]. She had been an idiot. A hopeless romantic. She should have known better.For Silver was truly dead and gone, and the pain of her loss had been renewed tenfold. She growled, running faster, the foliage becoming a blur. She had grown to love Silver, short as her time had been with her, and she simply couldn’t get the little redhead out of her heart. She had thought about it for so many years, and had felt so much confusion, anger, and guilt. [i]Guilt[/i]. She had promised she would return to her, and Orvus had said she would be waiting for her when she returned home. He had sounded so sure of himself, but the only thing that awaited her when she arrived, was a grave. And home became just a word. She thought she could handle it, but every little thing in that house, was a constant reminder of what was and would be no more. But perhaps what hurt most of all, was the complete and utter rejection she received from Li’Kalla. Laurien had seen the goddess waver, there was recognition there of the name Chickadee, and yet… She had been turned down. She was no stranger to rejection, yet Li’s words stung worse than any other time. It wasn’t right to be with a woman? There was no point? That was not what she had expected to hear, and it only drove her crazy. She wanted her so badly, for love, to apologize for failing her, and to be together again. But Li’Kalla was not Silver, and that message had been conveyed perfectly. She had left her mark. Then there was her [i]father[/i]. The one who had willingly been the architect of her pain. She who had willingly left to find Arya, to protect her, to bring her home, who watched her for years- what did she get in return? Nothing but broken promises and false dreams. No. That wasn’t right, was it? She had gotten to be a sister to Arya. She had a family. She had a people. Then why did she want more? Were those not good enough? Was it fair to blame Arya? She slowed down her pace. Her little- Well older sister. She loved Arya, she did, perhaps more than anyone else in the world. But she was so jealous of Arya. Her sister was loved by so many others. She was always first for everything, and on many occasion, Laurien was second best and nothing that she wanted ever seemed to matter. It always had something to do with Arya first. She who had been given Wreanon, she who Orvus cared more for- So lost in thought was she, that Laurien exploded out of the forest, almost colliding with a group of Nebulites. Quickly she shifted her momentum, and rolled to the side before crashing into them. She laid there in a daze for a moment, looking up at the canopy before a red head looked down on her. Her eyes widened and her heart skipped a beat as she looked upon the familiar figure. [color=plum]”S-Silver?”[/color] she said longingly, but she only saw what she wanted to see. Her eyes focused with a blink, and staring down at her was a Nebulite of flaming hair, and bright white eyes. She was joined by two more females, one of black hair and slim features and one of green hair that sparkled. They all looked concerned. “L-Laurien are you alright?” asked the flaming head. She opened her mouth to say no, but was betrayed by her own voice. [color=plum]”Fine dears, just got carried away running is all.”[/color] she said with a fake smile. They all smiled back unaware. [i]Good.[/i] Groggily she got up, and gazed down at them. [color=plum]”And who might you three be?”[/color] she asked them as she fixed her hair, moving it away from her eyes. The flame head spoke first, her voice oozing confidence. “You can call me Cassieopoeia.” “My name is Vera.” The black haired one said, calm and collected. “And I am Amphitrite!” the green haired one said enthusiastically. Laurien nodded to each of them, her smile, infectious. [color=plum]”It’s a pleasure my dears. So, what are you three doing out here all by yourselves?”[/color] Laurien asked, looking around. They were off the beaten path, in a small clearing. Through the trees she could see the Marble Star in the distance. “We were out exploring, is that okay? It was Cassieopoeia’s idea.” Amphitrite said, while Vera nodded. Cassieopoeia in the meantime gritted her teeth as she looked daggers into the other two. Laurien found that amusing. Then Cassieopoeia turned to look at her and said, “Yes, it was my idea, but they came along willingly. We weren’t going to go far.” Laurien took a closer look at this Flameheaded girl and found that she liked what she saw. She forced herself to giggle, and said, [color=plum]”Girls, girls. No one cares if you explore, certainly not me. But a word of advice. If you ever do get into trouble for something, don’t throw another to the wolf so easily.”[/color] she winked. Vera and Amphitrite looked at each other and then to the ground. Cassieopoeia held her head high, and that was when Laurien caressed her cheek. It was hard to tell if she blushed or not, but the slight quivering of her lips was enough for Laurien. [color=plum]”You’ll come with me, Cassie.”[/color] she stated warmly, with her best smile. Cassie blinked rapidly, and said, “And what if I don’t want to go with you?” For once, Laurien hesitated. She had been denied before, and had graciously admitted defeat. But now something told her to press her advantage. It was easy to read that Cassie knew not what she wanted, but Laurien could show her. She would not be denied, not this time. She needed a distraction and badly. She cocked her head to the side. [color=plum]”You can leave of course, but I’ll be very sad. Perhaps Vera or Amphitrite would cheer me up in your absence?”[/color] she said, looking to the two of them. There was an eagerness in their eyes, but Laurien turned back to Cassie, and she found the same eager eyes waiting. “Well, in that case, I’ll go with you.” Cassie said quickly. Laurien took her hand gently. [color=plum]”I’m glad.”[/color] she said in a sweet voice. She liked getting what she wanted and after all, she needed the distraction. [hr] Much later in the night, Laurien held Cassie a top her, stroking the girl’s thick head of hair while they laid on her bed. The girl slept with a smile on her face, but Laurien did not pay attention. Instead, she stared up at the ceiling, feeling satisfied with herself, but it was quickly dispersing. She wanted to live this way endlessly, to stave off the empty feeling. To forget in excess. A life of luxury and desire, anytime she wanted, free of worry and doubt. Love, love all the time. Her thoughts suddenly turned back to what Li’Kalla had expressed earlier in the day. That she could not love another of the same sex. She found herself disagreeing with that statement, for the proof was in front of her. There was no sense in shackling oneself to such limitations, when the world had so much more to offer. Anything could be loved. Well, perhaps not everything, but the vast majority that stood on two legs. Even gods. She had done that with Silver, merely a fragment of a god, but still held divinity. That had to count for something, right? She let out a soft sigh. She missed that little red head, more than anything. If only her father hadn’t murdered her, for apparently, no reason whatsoever. She had thought about forgiving him once, but after this, how could she? He hadn’t meant for any of it to happen, she had to tell herself, but… it still didn’t hurt any less. He should have made sure that Li'Kalla had gotten fixed properly, maybe then Silver would have endured within her. He should have done a lot of things during those years... She felt betrayed, and wronged, and so, so angry the more she thought about it. She wanted to lash out, to let loose and to cause Orvus pain, just like she had gone through. She no longer felt so ashamed about thinking such ways and it dawned upon her. The only person you could really count on in life, was yourself. If you wanted something then why not just take it? No, she couldn't think like that entirely, for actions had consequences and she was merely a mortal… Unless... The thought was dark and twisted, but it found a spot within her mind and settled right in. To get what she wanted, what she really wanted, meant she needed power. She sat up, cradling Cassie's sleeping form like a doll. The girl slept through the shift, but it wasn’t like Laurien was paying any attention to her anymore. Instead, Laurien’s eyes went wide with realization. To live deliciously, meant one had to sacrifice. To live without longing, one needed to indulge in pleasure. It was the only way to make wrongs, right. Silver would have wanted her to live on with passion. And as a wolfish grin etched itself onto her face, Laurien knew what she needed to do. [hider=summary] We find Laurien running away from her breakup with Li, having felt the pain of Silver’s loss twice now. As she runs she thinks about her life and place in the world. She eventually runs into a pack of Nebs and takes the one named Cassie with her. Later that night, Laurien thinks some more about life and realizes many things. We end on a sinister note. [/hider]