[h2]Feedback Saturday![/h2]

[hider - Ercanoriel]

[@fetzen]

Ercanoriel is a very unique character in the way that I like my unique characters - just a bit... odd.

A really nicely written appearance section Fetzen! 

The personality section took me a little to get to grips with, the concept of the three layers becomes a bit muddled. Maybe thats the point. My brain is also, admittedly, frazzled right now. Otherwise, I like the look of him. Very good traits, but some flaws too - his pride for instance.

In the history section, I'm reading that the parents split amicably - yet his regret is to do with his father, who really doesn't seem to play a large part in his life. I'm not sure if that is the point of it, it's a melancholic regret - a yearning for a father figure, but the regret should be based on something the character has actually done. It almost alludes to them having fought at some point but that's not in the sheet. 

I'd like some detailing on how he learned to use a two-handed axe, maybe why he gravitated to that weapon. I think weapons speak a lot about characters and I'd like to know a bit more about that especially as that is listed as his expert skill over magic, which does get a mention in the history. Why did he favour restoration over say destruction or alteration too, for example. 

A great sheet, and great concept. This was initially drawn from feedback I gave you based on an initial idea - so it's really great that you listened to it, and I hope this is a character you're excited about, with that in mind. 

Just with a few tweaks to those points I've brought up, Ercanoriel will be ready.



[/hider]

[hider - Sigri]

[@Tabris]

A lovely description, I especially liked the line "relics from the wilderness". Quite a short appearance section - a lot of my feedback to others has been to add in mannerisms, and descriptions that just add a touch beyond the physical nature of the character. The bits that add flavour. 

I like that she's a bright and enthusiastic character, having Sigri in the group gives us more to play with in terms of optimism within the group, and there's definitely a line now between the gruffest to the most optimistic, nobody really crosses over and that's going to be fun to play with. I like the note about her getting along with loud commoners haha. Perhaps the section about the heat can go in the appearance section. (Paragraph 4) - the parts about her lacking refine could also be expanded on in the appearance section, as a suggestion. 

With Sigri, we have another character in the group whose history has been woven through with the Civil War, and I love that a few of our characters have really been touched by it, actually. Her story is very sweet, but I have a few questions. Did Sigri cause his death by burning the home down? Or did he die naturally and she let their home burn? Did anyone ever suspect her of murder? It's quite a big moment in her story but it's not very touched upon - although I understand you've been busy. Was her husband abusive? Even if she didn't love him did she at least like him? Were they happy without requited love, perhaps she found more love for him in her son? 

Skills and Spells are fine, as is the regret - just waiting on that goal :) Otherwise, a good job on this sheet! I think it can be polished and some clarifications given, but I understand you've been very busy and for being on a road trip this sheet is stellar! 



[/hider]



Thank you everyone for the patience in the reviews. 

As we begin introducing our characters - this round is quite pivotal in establishing the RP, so avoid double posting until a post from everyone has been made. That said, first posts should be made soonish, and just communicate with what is going on - if you're busy, stuck, need inspiration etc. 

To anyone just dropping in and lurking this thread, we are now closed for further applications at this point. If you are interested in the roleplay, there will be openings for more players and characters as we enter new episodes. Inevitably, current players may drop out etc so just keep checking or let me know you're interested and I can reach out to you if we have an opening.