Geralt withstood the onslaught of Lucien's words like a man staring at a firing squad. His jaw was set, teeth pressed together, free fist clench in his trouser pocket. He was resolute, but the humility he had worn so well in front of the Frenchman was completely lost. He could not longer hide the anger in his eyes. The fury at himself more than anything, for allowing himself to be caught completely unawares like this. He promised himself then and there that it would not happen again.

He opened his mouth to speak as Lucien turned away, and for once he was at a loss for words. Part of him deep down knew that the man was right. Geralt had not thought his actions through, but that only irritated him all the more. How he could be made to look like such a fool, especially in front of Lucien, it was maddening that he had done this to himself.

[i][color=crimson]Pathetic. You are nothing but a nuisance to him, just as you have always been. You are nothing, worse than the dirt beneath his shoe.[/color][/i]

That voice echoed through the chambers of his mind as he stood on the stage, book in hand, at a loss for words. It had been years, no decades, since he had felt this foolish. He would not allow it to happen again.

With a wave of his hand, the book disappeared and just as quickly as it had gone, his dashing smile returned and he dropped the power he held over his patrons. [color=crimson]"And with that, ladies and gentleman, boys and girls, I take my leave of you."[/color] With a bow, the lights flickered and he disappeared from sight. 

If he had stuck around the performance tent, he would have heard the crowd erupt into a chorus of applause as they gave a standing ovation. Men hooted and hollered, women laughed, children screamed with delight. The applause had always been his favorite part, the love that was showered on him by those beneath him...it was intoxicating. But tonight it would give him no comfort, and he hadn't earned it, anyway.

He reappeared in his trailer, his face set into a frown and his eyebrows furrowed. Immediately, he lurched toward the liquor cabinet and throw it open, bottles and glasses tinkling together loudly as he did so. He snatched out a bottle of German brandy, uncorked it, and poured himself a glass.

[i][color=crimson]Pathetic. Worthless. Disappointment. Trash.[/color][/i]

He sipped his drink as the these words repeated themselves over and over and over again in his mind. That growling voice that he could not escape reminding him of his failures, his shortcomings. It had been with him for so long that he was having trouble telling it apart from his own thoughts...How could he have made himself look so pathetic in front of Lucien? In front of [i]her[/i]?

[color=crimson][i]You were never good enough for your parents, never enough for [/i]her[i] and you never will be enough for anyone else either.[/i]

"Rrraaagh!"[/color] Before he could control himself, a scream escaped him and he threw the glass in his hand as hard as he could at the opposite wall. It shattered on impact, expensive German brandy running down the dark wood of the walls to the black carpet on the floor. 

He didn't stop here though. Rage had entered him, and as that voice cackled inside of him he knew it would not let him rest. He turned to the liquor cabinet, grabbed it by a corner and threw it to the ground. Bottles smashed together, throwing glass shards all over the floor. He then picked up a chair and swung it at the wall so hard that it exploded in a spray of wood fibers and splinters. 

This tantrum continued for several more minutes, and luckily for the Magician, there was only a single passing witness to his madness. Illyana had just finished with her line of customers and was headed from her trailer to Lucien's to report. The way they had set up this time, her path crossed by Geralt's trailer, which had been parked a little ways away from the others. 

She paused as she heard shattering glass and slowed to a stop, glancing at the lantern light that flickered in the window. She could see the figure of the Magician, locked in some sort of one-man battle with himself as he tore up the inside of his own living space. Something had certainly riled him...but she was glad he had chosen to have his outburst in private. Whatever it was, it was only loud enough that someone walking by would hear it. 

After a moment, a small smile touched the girl's lips and she continued on her way, leaving the man completely and utterly alone.