Jessica Jameson looked out onto the beach, grinning her DELINQUENT shark teeth in her COOL AS CUCUMBERS sunglasses and COMFY AS CARAMEL track suit, because she is very pale and burns quite easily. I mean, even with the full-body application of SPF 3000 lotion. It was kind of a problem, but people HAD to like the beach for a reason. She'd never been, but it SEEMED like a good place for a birthday party. If that birth was CHAOS. It was time to unleash the beast.

Jessica strolled casually up to a little girl working on a sand castle, knelt down, and appraised it.

"Wow, what a nice sand castle. That must have taken you HOURS."

The little girl nodded.

"Its beauty comes from its impermanence, much like life," the child replied, deep in thought.

"Yeah whatever but like it would be a shame if someone STOMPED ON IT," Jessica bellowed as she kicked at the sand castle, missed, kicked again, missed, and kicked a third time and managed to take the top off.

The child stared for a moment at Jessica, and then down at her sand HOUSE, and after another moment she began crying.

"GAHAHAHA," Jessica laughed her patented evil laugh, "I AM THE WORST, MOST TRAGIC THING THAT WILL HAPPEN ON OR TO THIS BEACH ALL DAY!"

If only her sister could see her now, bullying a helpless little girl on the beach and laughing about it. Perfecta would think she was SO COOL but that's too bad because Jessica didn't wanna hang out with that NERD anyways always being a genius and winning Nobel prizes like a COMPLETE TOOL. She kicked a small quantity of sand onto the little girl for good measure, and for a moment felt the accomplishment of achieving her DASTARDLY DESIGNS wash over her.

Truly this would be the best day ever, and she probably wouldn't cry herself to sleep even a little bit. And certainly wouldn't dwell on the fact that one small act of destruction from her could well have ruined a small child's best day ever.

"...Sheesh it's just a sand castle you can seriously stop crying you baby."