[center][h1][color=yellow]~O~[/color][/h1][/center] [center][h1][color=98ff98]Illyd Dyll[/color][/h1][/center] [center][h1][color=yellow]&[/color][/h1][/center] [center][h1][color=6fb887]Tekret Et Heret[/color][/h1][/center] [hr] Squinting, Illyd Dyll continued his wobbling walk away from Cadien and the Bat-God, eyes fixated on a particular rip through reality. He couldn’t see much through it, perhaps a beach? Then all of a sudden a tall, entirely naked, man with alabaster skin and hair jumped out of the rip, angrily barking about someone ruining his rest and threatening to beat them senseless. Illyd’s eyes widened as he flinched backwards, holding up a single apple in defense of himself, [color=98ff98]“Woah! Hold on, now!”[/color] The naked man pointed at Illyd and continued his tirade, [color=6fb887]“Was it you! You... God of....”[/color] [color=6fb887]“Something?”[/color] The porcelain man paused and scratched his head, righteous fury fading as he struggled to remember the god in front of him, [color=6fb887]“Wait who are you?”[/color] [color=98ff98]“I’m Illyd Dyll,”[/color] Illyd cleared his throat clear of his initial fright. He took a moment to observe the angered man and decided on the next course of action with a polite yet small and sheepish smile, [color=98ff98]“What’s wrong?”[/color] The naked statue of a man stared at Illyd for a second, and wordlessly held out a hand in confusion before, emphatically, gesturing to the portal behind him and shouting again, [color=6fb887]“What’s wr-? That! That’s wrong! I spend two thousand years doing my damn job, not one break, not even for a single stupid minute, and then, then I take a vacation.”[/color] He paused and exhaled, before bellowing and all gesturing wildly, [color=6fb887]“And one of my idiot siblings goes and does [i]that[/i]. I. Am. On. Vacation. You don’t just kick down a man’s door without asking! It’s not right!”[/color] [color=98ff98]“I don’t know about any of that,”[/color] Illyd Dyll gave a curt nod, [color=98ff98]“But seems to me that you owe it to yourself AND your vacation that you go on and get back to it!” He nodded again, and pushed the apple forward, “How ‘bout a lil snack, a lil nibble, and you go right back to your business. Don’t ye worry about the lil hole; I’ll put up some stones.” [/color] [color=6fb887]“No,”[/color] The man huffed, [color=6fb887]“No it’s ruined. It’s ruined and someone ruined it and when I find out who oh you better believe they’ll be getting what's coming.”[/color] The god took a few deep breaths, and then kept doing that for a frankly inappropriate amount of time, long enough for Illyd Dyll to swap out his apple for his harp -- an idle pluck here and there while he waited. When the man finally seemed to have calmed down he sighed and held out a hand, [color=6fb887]“I’m Tekret Et Heret, God of Rulership, Contracts, and the livin- No not that. Just the first two. Damn, it’s been a while since I spoke to another god. Can’t believe I used to introduce myself like that. Pretentious.”[/color] Illyd plopped an apple right into the waiting palm, [color=98ff98]“Yer hungry, I can tell. I get a little whippish when my stomach rumbles, too. But as I said before: I’m Illyd Dyll, nice to meet you friend.”[/color] Tekret stared at the apple, at Illyd, and then shrugged and took a bite. After a moment savouring the fruit he noted, [color=6fb887]“That’s pretty good. Don’t think I ever ate when I was down there. Or up here. Actually I don’t think I’ve ever eaten. Huh. So, Illyd Dyll, what are you the God of?”[/color] [color=98ff98]“Now see, that’s the interesting thing,”[/color] Illyd Dyll plucked at his harp, [color=98ff98]“Ye saying yer the God of Rulerships and Contracts -- but so am I, ain’t that wild?” [/color] [color=6fb887]“Yes,”[/color] Tekret deadpanned while rolling his eyes, [color=6fb887]“Wild.”[/color] Illyd Dyll accompanied Tekret with a warm chuckle -- as if he was sharing it with the god, [color=98ff98]“I’m jus’ pullin’ yer leg. Thought a little joke might clear the mood around here.”[/color] Tekret seemed to deflate, a little, [color=6fb887]“Sorry, sorry. It’s been... A while. Actually I don’t think anyone has ever told [i]me[/i] a joke. Told myself a few, though. Can’t say they were much better than that.”[/color] The naked god glanced at the other portals and asked, [color=6fb887]“You been through any of those yet? See what the others have been up to for the last few thousand years?”[/color] [color=98ff98]“If I’m bein’ honest,”[/color] Iylld Dyll plucked at his harp in thought, [color=98ff98]“I didn’t even realize that much time had passed; it’s no short of a wonder or a credit to your intellect that you managed to count that long -- but to answer your question: I’m jus’ along for the ride, recently stepped here myself.” He got lost in a few notes before suddenly brightening, “Oh but ye know what? I did meet a great guy named Cadien, he should still be here -- even. Right over yonder.”[/color] Illyd jabbed a thumb behind himself. [color=6fb887]“You didn’t realize?”[/color] Tekret narrowed his eyes, [color=6fb887]“You don’t mean to say I was the only one actually working, for the last two millenium? Do you? That can’t be what you’re implying, Illyd. I mean look at you, god of unsolicited apples, people probably needed those. Right?”[/color] A pained expression took hold of the marbleesque god’s face, [color=6fb887]“And Cadien, God of Perfection! The Humans obviously would have needed him too, he had to have been swamped. Just swamped. Had to be.”[/color] [color=98ff98]“Now now,”[/color] Illyd Dyll slung his harp back over his shoulder and raised his palms, [color=98ff98]“I can’t rightfully speak for anyone but myself. As far as myself, though, all I remember is a pleasant plucking or two, a nibble there and a bite here -- and one fantastic nap under the sun. Ever have a pumpkin?”[/color] [color=6fb887]“A... Pumpkin?”[/color] Tekret looked positively despondent, and wistfully looked back into his portal at his beach, [color=6fb887]“No I uh, I don’t think I have.”[/color] [color=98ff98]“Oh boy, you gotta try one, you have to!”[/color] Illyd Dyll looked around [color=98ff98],”No vines here tho- oh!”[/color] As if willed -- which it was -- a massive green vine suddenly pushed out of the stone floor and curled around the two. In a span of seconds it matured, thick orange pumpkins bursting out of their buds -- full and ripe. [color=98ff98]“Well now would you look at that!”[/color] A chalk white hand reached out and, struggling to actually grasp the sizable pumpkin, just scooped a handful out of it like it was butter. Tekret took the chunk and bit into it, rind and all. After a moment of concentrated chewing he swallowed and commented uncertainly, [color=6fb887]“Maybe, uhm, stick to the apples.”[/color] [color=98ff98]“Yer eatin’ it all wrong, friend!”[/color] Illyd Dyll shook his head and snagged a pumpkin from the vine. He tossed the pumpkin in the air where it floated obediently and instructed, [color=98ff98]“Ye gotta give it a little zap-a-doo and some razzmatazz, or it’s gonna be all chunky and bitter. Do it right and ye got one of the thirty seven spices of life. Watch see.”[/color] The god stuck his tongue between his teeth in concentration and then with a quick crunch and a soft sizzle, the pumpkin squished into a warm paste. Illyd scratched his chin, and long sugary canes popped out next to the vine, shedding a white powder and bombarding the mush. Illyd Dyll snapped, [color=98ff98]“I jus’ had an idea!”[/color] Next thing the two gods knew, a flash of golden wheat was growing alongside the rest, its plentiful grains whisking around the paste until with a flash of light a wholesome pie remained. Illyd Dyll nodded twice, [color=98ff98]“Enough for sharin’ too.”[/color] Tekret’s white eyes skipped between the pie and Illyd, and he let out a half hearted chuckle, [color=6fb887]“God of Food then? Well, if you’re going to share I’ll try it. If I can’t have my vacation at least I can discover food.”[/color] [color=98ff98]“Grab a slice, friend!”[/color] Illyd Dyll smiled warmly, the pie splitting into two and floating to each. The God of Contracts grabbed his and took a bite, freezing as he did so. He savoured the taste, and then devoured the rest of the slice in short order. A small smile crept its way onto his lips and he thanked the other divine, [color=6fb887]“I can’t say you’re bad at what you do, Illyd. Thank you. I... May have needed this.”[/color] [color=98ff98]“D’aw, well think nothing of it,”[/color] Illyd’s slice was already gone, his fingers already back to work on his crooked harp, [color=98ff98]“Hey, ye see any trees around here? I gotta set up my hammock.”[/color] [color=6fb887]“Trees?”[/color] Tekret asked incredulously, as he looked around at the barren arena they stood in, [color=6fb887]“I... Haven’t seen any trees.”[/color] He bit his lip and eyed Illyd for a moment before shrugging and pointing behind him with his thumb, [color=6fb887]“There’s a few palms on my beach, though. I think I might linger here a moment, see if the others have ah, been doing something for the last while. Anything, really. But you can use my trees, if you want to.”[/color] Illyd Dyll narrowed his eyes, his smile growing cheshire, [color=98ff98]”Are ye invitin’ me over to yer place?”[/color] The arguably shorter god burst with energy and slapped his bag back over his shoulder, [color=98ff98]”You sneaky beetle, I think that’s a wonderful idea!”[/color] Tekret pursed his lips, but nodded, [color=6fb887]“Just, please, stay on the beach. I’ll be back before long.”[/color] [color=98ff98]”I’ll wait around here until you wanna come, feels weird going in alone,”[/color] Illyd Dyll dropped his bag again, [color=98ff98]”Probably just string the hammock here on... something ‘nd we’ll cross paths on yer way back in. Easy peasy.”[/color] The naked man nodded, and then glanced at the arrayed portals before adding, [color=6fb887]“Sure. Now I just need to find out who...”[/color] A small fire lit in the gods eyes as he strode off, once again muttering about his vacation. Now, though, he was also occasionally rambling to himself about pie. An improvement, on the whole. [hr] [hider=Summary] So we follow Illyd Dyll on his curious quest where he finds Tekret, God of nudity and yelling at people. Illyd calms him down and they have a rather slow and pointless chat but Illyd thought it was nice -- then Tekret invites him over ( after learning that he can bake ) but they both mutually decide to stay in Antiquity for now. That’s totally how it happened. The end. [/hider]