Cas could see that Iris was still reluctant to keep eating, but he was glad that she was trying. The food and water he was coaxing her to consume would do nothing but benefit her in the long run. Even if it made her stomach upset in the beginning, they had to keep trying to get her to keep it down, so she would have the energy she needed to break the fever. His own desire to get back to the capital aside, he was worried that if she didn’t start getting better, she would put herself in a dangerous position when they didn’t have access to a nearby hospital.

He nodded and lifted another forkful of food for her to eat, only to falter when he felt her hand on his arm. The gentleness of her voice and touch derailed his thoughts, and he cursed inwardly as a warm, fuzzy feeling spread through his insides against his will. It was frustrating to him how easily she was able to affect him—to make him question the logic that had given him the resolve to keep his distance from her. Silently, he meditated on the fact that they were going to have to part ways when they got to the capital, attempting to overpower emotions with reason. It was a difficult task for one who had a hard time ignoring his heart to begin with.

When she fixed her gaze on his mouth and leaned closer, he could feel his willpower fracturing. He desperately wanted to close the remaining gap between them. They were alone in the apartment with no one else around to interrupt them, and they were in no hurry to go anywhere because of her illness. It was the perfect time to give in, and for a moment, he did. Letting his hand drop back down to the plate, he set her lunch back down on the coffee table as he tentatively edged closer to her on the sofa. No words had been exchanged between them, but he knew she still wanted him too. Spurred by her reciprocation, he closed his eyes and moved in to kiss her, only to halt a hairsbreadth from her lips.

[color=#b97703][i]This is a mistake,[/i][/color] the thought practically slapped him in its prominence. At once, reality set in again, and he inhaled slowly, trying to cool down the lustful fire that burned in his core. He couldn’t kiss her. Even though he wanted to, he knew it was wrong. They had no future together, so being physical again would just make their inevitable parting more painful for both of them. He didn’t want to lead her on and give her false hope that there could be something between them when it was impossible. He’d promised Maisie that he wouldn’t do that.

Yet he couldn’t bring himself to draw back from where he hovered near her mouth.

[color=#b97703]“We shouldn’t do this,”[/color] he whispered, opening his eyes again, though he avoided her gaze. Still lingering close to her, he could feel her hot breath mingling with his, and he shivered involuntarily. The sensation made it all the more difficult for him to say the next part: [color=#b97703]“We can’t be together, Iris. I don’t want to hurt you, but I know I will if we ignore what’s coming… As soon as I step back inside the walls of the capital, we’ll never see each other again.”[/color]