[hider=My Review in Blue] [color=cyan]No image reeeeee[/color] [center][b]Name:[/b] Marduk Girga [color=cyan]You wouldn't know why, but this name gives me flashbacks.[/color] [b]Age:[/b] 60 [color=cyan]oh shit an old man[/color][/center] [b]Guild Mark Location:[/b] Across his upper back [b][u]Magic Type:[/u][/b] [b]Portal Magic[/b] [indent] [color=cyan]So uh, it seems your style of the sheet is relatively incompatible with my style of reviewing, but no worries because I'll address the content of the snipped quotes as if they weren't snipped. To that end, you say distance is tied with magic spent so what kind of ballpark upper limit are we looking at for Marduk? His line-of-sight, miles, the whole country, more?[/color][/indent] [hider=Spells:] [list][*][b]Lock Out[/b] - Marduk is capable of locking out specific, non-living things from entering his portal. Ex. If a man jumps into a portal configured to lock out clothes, the man comes out the other end wearing nothing. [*][b]Shadow Portal[/b] - The portals created are invisible to the naked eye. Creating these portals require great concentration from him, which, if broken, are broken. [*][b]One for All[/b] - Creates a specialized portals a single entrance point can have multiple exit points. Choice of exit points is entirely up to him. [*][b]All for One[/b] - Creates specialized portals where multiple entrance points have a single exit point. [*][b]False Portal[/b] - A fake portal is created. It is neither an entrance nor exit point, and attempting to touch it will simply make it disappear. [color=cyan]So mundane, yet it is a relevant spell so you were right to list it. I'm conflicted on its existence not as a balancing issue, but as a metaphorical critique of my own rules.[/color] [*][b]False Portal: Trap[/b] - A fake portal that is loaded up with magic. Interacting with it causes it to explode. [color=cyan]How big go boom?[/color][/list][/hider] Magic Rank: A [i](Functionally B - in combat, he deteriorates [b]fast[/b])[/i] [color=cyan]If he's functionally B, we're calling him B[/color] [b]Equipment:[/b] [u][b]Strengths[/b][/u] [color=cyan]Nothing to really address in his strengths, though I wouldn't consider "life advice" particularly important when the rest of the cast are as cocky as they are.[/color] [b][u]Weaknesses:[/u][/b] [color=cyan]I also see no issues here. Good of him to be a volunteer for doing chores.[/color] [u][b]Personality:[/b][/u] Marduk is a patient, tolerating man, though firm and does not turn a blind eye to wrong doings. While he seems slow to act, the truth of the matter is he is merely considering other angles of approach and once he has settled on one, he decisive and final. With regards to conflict, he is not adverse to it, in fact encouraging it as a means to grow - however, [i]combat[/i] is another, and while he is not a pacifist, he will most likely try to resolve things with words [color=cyan]coward[/color], before resorting to dragging their face across the curb. Not exactly a quiet old man, Marduk is quite chatty and enjoys a good conversation, even if that conversation is quite literally over nothing. Generally friendly, there are few things that actually anger him - particular among those is the harming of children, and the deliberate, malicious manipulation of a persons' feelings, particularly between family or lovers [color=cyan]"Uh oh, drama alert!"[/color]. When faced with such things, even his anger is cold, and in acting on it he is calculative, precise and incisive. Forgiveness, therefore, rarely comes, either because the perpetrators have been punished duly, or there is no one [i]left[/i] to forgive. [b][u]History/Bio:[/u][/b] A former Wizard Saint candidate and local legend [color=cyan]oooh he a big boi[/color], Marduk was once part of the Magic Councils' personal forces, with him in particular being assigned to missions that required overwhelming force and swiftness. His record of completed missions, should said missions be classified as quests, his tally would be: [color=cyan]So I get the purpose of this comparison in concept, but 100 Year and 10 Year quests don't refer to difficulty so its a bit weird to me to see them compared to his missions like this.[/color] However, as none of these were official quests, he never received monetary compensation for them - not that he minded. For him, the objective had always been to serve the people, to the best of his ability. Marduk was not a man of extraordinary background; born to an ordinary couple, his father was a magic tool manufacturer, while his mother was a school teacher and writer, there was nothing that would indicate him as a special existence. But perhaps that was a driving force in and of itself. He was born with talent and innate magic power, yes, but also an appreciation for the 'normal' things in life - to be sad without tragedy, to be experience happiness over the littlest things, to be angry without atrocity as its cause, to love without reservation and without ulterior motives. It was growing up in this atmosphere that strengthened his resolve as he grew into his magic. Guilds were too commercialized and joining the Knights was inefficient. As an independent mage he caught the interest of the Magic Council, who inducted them into their forces, and who directed him in what he believed to be the most effective manner of saving others [color=cyan]he believed WRONG[/color]. For a time, he was content with his role - he felt as though he were doing good, and oftentimes he could visibly see the effects of his actions and feel pride in it. However, the stronger he grew the more entrenched he became in the machinations of the Magic Council, and the more entrenched he became, the more he was exposed to the uglier side of the world he worked in. From clandestine operations to wholesale slaughter and extermination, he engaged in all manner of shadiness - all, they had said, for a good cause, and yet each such mission left the taste of ash in his mouth. There was no sense of accomplishment now. Still, the Magic Council kept him on their leash with the one thing that they were aware would work against him - the truth. Yes, these operations were morally questionable, sometimes even downright vile, but the Council knew his power and hid nothing from him. Every 'why' and 'how' was explained to him, every reason and factor given to him so that he might weigh it against the happiness of others and decide on acting for the greater good. And so he continued to work in their service, perhaps taking on the most daunting and deadly tasks as a form of self-punishment, until such time that he be given reason to leave. That reason came soon enough, with the extermination of a Dark Guild. Death and killing was something he was experienced with by now, but never had he taken the life of a child. Always he acted as executioner only for those deserving, and those yearning. At that moment however, he came face to face with the fact that the men he served under had no such regard for life - and no matter how well meaning an organization, Marduk could not in good conscience work under those who had considered life so easily weighed [color=cyan]greater good don't always feel so great innit[/color]. In the assault against the Dark Guild, Marduk turned on is partners, who refused to spare the life of a single little girl. The ensuing battle injured him and left him permanently weakened, and also left the surrounding area a wasteland. [color=cyan]I have to imagine most of the collateral damage was from others, because Marduk's portals don't seem particularly destructive on their own even with some creativity thrown in.[/color] Normally such actions would earn him the ire of the Magic Council and a target on his back [color=cyan]spoiler: they still do[/color], but they relented because of his years of service, his still considerable strength, and, perhaps most importantly, should they even attempt, the secrets of the Council had revealed to him will see the light of day. [b]Extra:[/b] Likes playing board games. [color=cyan]Bonus points for using this section. I have to admit that I like the concept of a grizzled veteran that's been around and seen a few things. I'm a little bothered by his "quest count" numbers thrown into his backstory for a couple reasons, primarily because of the criticism I already provided but also because it implies that Marduk has been doing a lot of dirty jobs for the Magic Council. Not that it doesn't happen, [i]trust me it does[/i], but they have the actual Wizard Saints to do some Dark Guild squashing. Not to mention the Black Curtain guild that loves getting the money for doing just that. I would feel that Marduk would be better served by his experience with the Magic Council being mostly devoid of the "dark side" of it and his introduction to these dirty jobs and shady things be his motivation to cut ties and bail. Other than these history nitpicks he looks good, just need a little clarification on his upper limit of capability with the portals.[/color] [/hider] [@TheHangedMan]