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The hospital room was quiet except for the beep of the heart monitor and the nervous tapping of Vashti’s foot as she sat beside Emily. The tapping slowed as Vashti began breathing in through her nose and out through her mouth, the annoying mantra of every cheap spa guru ever. Despite the cliche of the whole thing, it did have the calming effect she was looking for to give Vashti enough clarity to realize how big of an asshole she’d just made herself look. Madison had pull when it came to the Coven while Vashti had none. She didn’t regret the things that she said, but the way that she said it…[i]shit.[/i] The fact that nobody came to watch over Emily was telling enough. Vashti ran her fingers through her hair and locked them behind her head as she breathed. In, out, in, out, in. 

The door opened with a knock. Oh, great, it turned out Vashti was right and Babylon had come back to finish the job. What had been her plan, exactly? The Leviathan was tucked away wherever it went inside of her when it was scared, and even if it was around it wasn’t like Vashti could tell it to protect Emily. She held in her breath and looked up to seem Babylon striking down upon her, but was instead greeted by the sight of Herik limping toward the chair beside her. In a way that was worse than Babylon. Maybe they sent him to tell her that she was out. God, that’d be brutal. She smoothed out her hair to hide her malformed ears and rested her hands on her knees, slowly letting out the breath she had been holding. 

She stared at the foot of Emily’s bed. That was the best greeting she could give him as he began to speak about Elise. Vashti frowned. She wasn’t even sure if she had ever truly spoken to Elise. She wasn’t even sure if she knew which girl Elise was, exactly. The blonde one, right? She was about to say something when Herik reached out and grabbed her hand. It shut her right up.

“...It won't get better with this group…”

[color=darkcyan]“I’m getting that impression,”[/color] muttered Vashti as Herik continued. 

“...I know it's a lot, but I hope you stay."

Vashti sighed, looked at his hand holding hers, and turned to Herik with a sad smile. [color=darkcyan]“Thank you, but I…”[/color] Have nowhere else to go? Can’t leave, because it’d be too dangerous for her to be alone again? She continued slowly, [color=darkcyan]“I don’t know if that’s my call anymore.”[/color]

In part, she was talking about Madison and the other girls, but there was something else too. Vashti let go of his hand. 

[color=darkcyan]“I owe you an explanation.”[/color]

She had been avoiding the conversation with Herik since the other night. Even after the doctors had patched her up she had seen to it to never be caught alone with the guy. She fidgeted nervously in her chair as she tried to formulate the thought in her head. She felt nauseous and lowered her head back in the chair until she was staring up at the fluorescent lights. Why was it so difficult to say it? Vashti closed her eyes so tightly that the back of her eyelids turned into a black, starless night sky being bombarded by fireworks. 

[color=darkcyan]“Dude, sometimes I think I’m out of control. Like just now? Or when I went off on Madison in the elevator the other day? I used to just shrug shit like that off, man. But ever since getting cursed I’ve...well, I haven’t been me and I’m not talking about the transformations. Herik I know it sounds like an excuse but I—it’s just—how can I…”[/color] 

Vashti opened her eyes, her slitted pupils dancing around the room in a panicked confusion before she covered them with her hands.

[color=darkcyan]“I know it helped us against the Outsider, but that was just dumb luck. It’s pure chaos. It could do anything, go after anyone. Herik, when I turn into the Leviathan I don’t control it at all. I used to think the reverse of that was true but now...now I’m pretty sure it's always has some sway.”[/color]