[center][img]https://i.imgur.com/DxUIER1.png[/img][/center] [color=Turquoise]"...may I help you, ma'am?"[/color] [color=Orange]"Hello, please yes, I would like to request a formal audience with your ruling May-Or."[/color] [color=Turquoise]"....uh-huh......name?"[/color] [color=Orange]"Princess Koriand'r, scion of the Royal House of Tamaran, Watcher of the Seals of Xhaal, Commander of the Grand Armada of Tamarus, and bearer of the title Starfire."[/color] [color=Turquoise]"....and your reason for wanting to see the Mayor?"[/color] [color=Orange]"I wish to begin diplomatic parlay between our worlds, and to gain valuable allies in the fight against the ass-holes."[/color] [color=Turquoise]"............"[/color] [color=Orange]"If you please?"[/color] [color=Turquoise]".......is this some kinda anime thing? Because the convention's not til this weekend."[/color] My new friend, the native witch-girl Rachel, has spent much of her mornings performing research on our assailants, the Homeland Intervention Vulrenability Explication Corporation, which goes by the abbreviation HIVE. According to her research, they are mercenary warriors, a "private security firm" that operates in many of this planet's various nation-states. From what she has been able to determine, every city in which they operate happens to also see an increase in citizens disappearing-- something Rachel believes to be no coincidence. While I do not come close to understanding the intricacies of this world's politics yet, I cannot see how such an organization is allowed to continue its practices. So I have come to enlist the aid of the local ruler, the May-Or of Jump City, in the hopes that he will rally the planet's warriors to defeat HIVE and their squads of mercenary ass-holes. Unfortunately, the May-Or's defender, the Receptionist, is proving to be most unhelpful. [color=Orange]"Forgive me,"[/color] I say, [color=Orange]"But I am unfamiliar in the ways of the Ani-May. Perhaps if I learn and study, I will be worthy of speaking to the May-Or then?"[/color] The Receptionist gives me a flat, dead-eyed look-- the type that Friend Rachel often gives me-- as if I had floobernok lizards crawling out of my g'norzz. [color=Turquoise]"This weekend,"[/color] she explains, [color=Turquoise]"over at the civic center. They rented it out for the whole weekend, specifically to do all the animes and the role-playing and the dungeons and the dragons and whatnot. You'll find a whole bunch of people like you. You know. Dorks."[/color] [color=Orange]"Ah! Splendid!"[/color] I exclaim, finally hearing some good news. [color=Orange]"Perhaps I will find allies and friends among the Dorks! Especially if they know the secrets of taming dragons! This is most excellent!"[/color] [color=Turquoise]"....uh-huh. Now is there anything else I can do for you?"[/color] [color=Orange]"Oh! Perhaps, if you know where the Dorks congregate, I could--"[/color] [color=Turquoise]"[i]NEXT![/i]"[/color] The Receptionist, guardian and attendant of the powerful May-Or, has closed off my chances of securing a formal alliance with the government of Jump City, at least for the time being. But I will not despair, for the flames of Starfire must burn ever-bright with hope. And to find aid in the battles to come, I will first find my allies among the Dorks.... [hr] [color=Goldenrod]"I don't get it."[/color] [color=Pink]"Of course you don't get it, big guy. That's why [i]I[/i] do all the getting for us."[/color] [color=Goldenrod]"Why did Doctor Jones just let the fat kid go? Does he really think he's going to find them out there?"[/color] [color=Pink]"Oh, he [i]knows[/i] the fat kid is going to find them. He can't help it."[/color] [color=Goldenrod]"But the city's huge! And that kid was dumb as a bag of rocks!"[/color] [color=Pink]"Doesn't matter. All our greasy chubby little friend needs to find them is a little luck."[/color] [color=Goldenrod]"[i]Pffffft[/i], he'd need the kind of luck that could........oh. Right. Now I get it."[/color] [color=Pink]"Again, Mammoth. That's why I do all the getting for us."[/color] [hr] [color=MediumSlateBlue]"That's twice this month, Polinsky. If you're late again, you're fired."[/color] [color=YellowGreen]"Y-y-yes sir, Mister Wolfman! I-i-it won't happen again!"[/color] Alex Polinski sputtered as he cowered behind the cash register at the Unnatural Twenty Comics and Hobby Shop. His mom had convinced the store owner to give him a part-time job since he spent so much time at the store anyway, and for a while it seemed like a dream job. But that dream was quickly becoming a nightmare. Having to punch in and out of a time-clock every shift, having to keep a 'positive attitude' when dealing with jerk-ass loser customers with their stupid questions about normie games, not being allowed to play his favorite post-industrial-thrash-core tunes over the store's sound system, having to put up with whiny kids and their lame parents on Pokémon Tournament Nights.....even getting a store discount on merchandise wasn't worth having to deal with all of this [i]work.[/i] Still, it was this or going back to Big Boy Burgers, and he wasn't sure they would take him back after they caught him sleeping in the meat cooler. Two write-ups for lateness in one month, such BS. If only he could remember what happened last night.....why he slept in so late this morning......and why every time he tried to think back about it, he suddenly wanted to scream. Alex let out a groan, his day already going badly, before clocking in for his shift. Time to head to the back room and start sorting out the new issues of-- [color=Orange]"Excuse me,"[/color] came a voice as the front door opened. [color=Orange]"Would you happen to be a Dork?"[/color] Alex Polinski dropped his bag of Funyuns, as the most beautiful girl he had ever seen walked into the shop. [color=YellowGreen]"Uhhhh, I'm a--.....I mean, hi, my name's-.....whu-....hold on...."[/color] [color=Orange]"I am looking for someone to teach me in the ways of the Ani-May....."[/color]