Even as he held her she still felt tense unable to fully relax and take her mind off of her worries, though she was trying hard to divert her mind knowing she needed too because festering on it was not healthy and she knew she could become obsessive with it. It didn’t help with the fact she often felt guilty for discussing her issues with Cas, she felt bad because he shouldn’t have to shoulder it with her when he had his own problems and no doubt stresses that he was going through as it had been traumatic for him to be captured like he had. That and her own betrayal still weighed heavily on her mind that she had even done that to him. A part of her questioning herself on how she could say she loved him when she had done such a thing to him. 

Feeling his hand run gently across her back it did feel soothing, to feel his touch as she tried to compose herself from her troubles not wanting to let it break her because she was strong and she could handle this. The fears would always be there, but then she hadn’t truly accepted what had happened from the moment they had touched back into the Capital. A part of her felt like she should have run after dragging him back, but she knew in her heart she couldn’t have left without knowing he would be okay after getting the treatment he needed. 

Even with his confirmation that she needn’t apologise she still guilty for putting it on him, wincing at the idea of being honest with her feelings it was a huge bucket of emotions that she didn’t even want to deal with let alone getting him involved. [color=f49ac2]“I know I can.”[/color] Trying to match his reassuring smile though she felt it falter briefly, but overall, he was right. They were safe right now; they could relax a little more together before they even had to think on what they would do next. Though before she could even consider what she would say next she caught the sly smile and then the suggestive whisper which gave her a slither of hope as she could easily latch onto that. Especially when it still excited her, and she melted into the deep kiss in hopes to forget about the time bomb of emotions waiting to just erupt. 

It felt so natural with him and she felt the smile brighten on her face as she caught her own breath looking over at Cas hoping that her daze would continue because the nagging feeling was still there in the back of her mind. [color=f49ac2]“I should hope not. Waking up next to you is something I never want to end.”[/color] Leaning up as she placed a kiss to his cheek before whispering in his ear cheeks heating up at the suggestive comment she was about to make. [color=f49ac2]“Neither is sleeping [i]with[/i] you.”[/color] Latching onto this subject was far easier than dealing with her emotions right now, plus she was only following his suggestion to relax a little.