At the end of the day Cas was right, what happened in Bel Bicis couldn’t be changed no matter how hard they wished it to not be true. Those people had still died, the district ravaged by the bomb rendering most if not all of the town useless. Covered in dust and rubble from the buildings that were destroyed and scattered corpses and bones no doubt littering what once used to be the streets of that district. It made her feel sick thinking on it, the needless death because of the war, or more likely because she had kidnapped the Prince in the first place. Somehow that thought still weighed on the back of her mind, even though they were happily spending time with one another and progressing their budding relationship she still felt that guilt of what was the biggest mistake she had ever made in her life. 

Even as she sobbed into his chest, she could still feel why he would be upset, they had stayed in the apartment of the bodies he had seen. A snapshot of what everyday life would have been like for them as they used their home to seek shelter from the rebels. A part of her already started to scold herself because he was going through a lot as much as she was, she wanted to support him through it like he was doing with her, but even as she thought that her sobs continued as she felt his hand rub up and down her back soothingly. 

It was typical that at the moment she had caved and started to open up to him the food arrived, the knock on the door pulling her out of her sobs as she glanced up nodding to Cas knowing he had to get that. Trying to halt her tears she gripped her arm with her hand finding the pressure to help her focus, wiping the tears from her eyes she knew she had to sort herself out. There was no way she could spend the morning crying over things that were now in the past, no matter how much it hurt or upset her she couldn’t dwell on it. [color=f49ac2]“Hah… yeah...”[/color] Sighing softly in agreement trailing off as she glanced at the domes now on the coffee table, a part of her not feeling all too hungry anymore but she knew that was just due to the surge of emotions she had gone through. 

[color=f49ac2]“I’ll try to eat a little. M-Maybe it will help.”[/color] As much as she had been hungry that feeling had gone the minute, she let her emotions overcome her. Thankful she could at least start to string some sentences together and wasn’t some blubbering mess in his arms unable to cope with the events that had just gone. Not wanting to think on it further she moved from the sofa to grab her own plate of food wondering on if she would continue to talk after eating, she could still feel herself tremble slightly after releasing the tears and she knew she needed to discuss it more than she just had, but it was hard. The idea that he would see her so vulnerable, as someone who he couldn’t lean on for support was something she thought of, but most importantly the trust was something she was getting used too especially as something told her she had never really opened up like this before to anyone. Maybe she had with Maisie, but she couldn’t be sure, not with her memories still playing havoc. 

Opening up the dome she was greeted with the scent of freshly made food, it not only smelled delicious, but it looked it too. Finding herself smile slightly at the sight she looked down at the breakfast happy for a distraction, though already she felt sick at the idea of eating it which was a shame because it looked like top quality food. Placing the dome back over her food with a sigh she shook her head, [color=f49ac2]“I’m sorry Cas, I might have to wait to eat a little. I’m not… well... I’ve never really talked before.”[/color] Grimacing she placed it back on the coffee table as she began to fiddle with her fingers, clearly uncomfortable. [color=f49ac2]“It’s difficult, I still have nightmares about… well. Everything, but mainly about him. I was shown pictures of his… eh…”[/color] Shaking her head it was hard to come out with it, that she had been shown pictures of her dead father right before she was tortured with that drug.