[center][url=https://fontmeme.com/cursive-fonts/][img]https://fontmeme.com/permalink/181015/5ceecc7538164d6fcf8526b3db450793.png[/img][/url] [img]https://i.imgur.com/r0kQiuz.png?1[/img] [hr][@almalthia] — Professor Kaylee Everose's Office - 8:20 AM[hr][hr][/center] [hider=Part I]Aya stared at Professor Everose, confusion clear on her face, as the older woman explained the 'test'. She was supposed to... [i]what[/i]? Her eyes flicked down to the small black envelopes, roman numerals drawn on them like calligraphy. She tried to wrap her mind around exactly what was being asked of her. After requesting a bit more clarification, Aya was even more lost than she was before. She was supposed to just... sit with closed envelopes, [i]not[/i] go to the Astral Plane, and what, have visions like some sort of oracle? Aya didn't fully understand her powers yet (and didn't think she [i]wanted[/i] to) but she was fairly certain that wasn't how they worked. She only left her body to venture to other places, she didn't have visions, or... But then that man's face flashed in her mind, smiling and surrounded by smoke. She'd dreamt of him. And then the next day he'd appeared on campus, standing with Dean Ashford, his eyes glued to Uná. A chill ran up Aya's spine at the memory. She looked up to Professor Everose, still hesitant. She'd always been so kind to Aya - warm. Ever since that first day, when Aya had come stumbling into this very office, all apologies and hurried excuses, saying she wanted to withdraw from the school before even giving it a chance. Professor Everose was the reason she'd stayed. Aya didn't know if that had been a good or bad choice. Staying - [i]belonging[/i] - felt dangerous. But Aya hadn't felt like she belonged anywhere in a long time. She looked at Professor Everose's soft green eyes. She smelled the faint, sweet waft of her perfume. She thought of the small, carved butterfly on her bedside table, a gift given from Charles Xavier, to Professor Everose, and finally to her. Aya wanted to belong. She pressed her lips together and gave a small, meek nod. Aya didn't know why she was being given this test, or what the professor hoped to glean from it, but she would try. She reached forward to pick up the first envelope. It was heavier than expected - the black paper was thick, clearly of high quality. She looked at it, pinched between her fingers. With her other hand she grabbed the pen and clicked it open. Aya gave one last, uncertain look up at Professor Everose, before focusing again on the envelope. Then she waited. And waited. And waited. And waited. Aya grew more and more exasperated as the minutes ticked by. She didn't know what she was supposed to do or how she was supposed to do it, she didn't know what was being expected of her, and she didn't know if she was a massive failure yet, or if it would take another 20 minutes for that to be decided. Aya didn't know how long she'd been staring at the little envelope in her lap. The plush chair that should've been comfortable was starting to feel stiff and misshaped, and her fingers felt stiff from holding the pen. With a sigh she dropped it, and listened to the pen clatter softly against the paper of the notebook. Holding the envelope in her lap, she stared down at it. The innocuous little thing was slowly turning into a source of frustration. Aya bit her lip. Then she let out a slow, steadying breath, and closed her eyes. Memories of her childhood flowed back to her of afternoons spent with her mother, incense thick in her lungs. The strands of a tatami mat would dig into the flesh of her shins as she fought to keep her eyes closed and her back straight. Aya's mother had been insistent on meditation - the need to clear the mind and still the body. Something petty in Aya rose its head. Even if this somehow worked, she didn't want to give her mother the satisfaction. Professor Everose was still sitting across from her, as patient as ever. Aya's fingers tightened on the envelope. Then she closed her eyes, forcing her muscles to relax. She let in a slow breath, and pushed it out again through her mouth. It was shocking how easy it was to slip back into meditation, even after all these years. Aya let the sensations of the world wash over her - the soft [i]tick, tick, tick[/i] of the clock along the far wall, the smell of books and flowers and Professor Everose's perfume, the feel of the chair leather supporting her legs and back, the soft cotton of her top brushing against her skin, the weight of her hair falling against her shoulder blades, the stiff paper in her hands, with its rivets and folds. Aya let go of worrying about the time. The second hand of the clock sounded its path around the center, each beat in time with her heart. Another slow, deep breath in. Then out. The world around Aya stopped.[/hider] [hider=Part II]Her eyes shot open. Sensations snapped into focus again, sight and sound and touch all rushing back to her. Professor Everose was still sitting across from her, in full color. She was still on the Material Plane. She looked back down at the envelope again. Had... had that been it? Whatever she was supposed to do or feel or see... Excitement flowed through her, that [i]maybe[/i] she was onto something. Eager to complete whatever task Professor Everose had set before her, Aya breathed in again and closed her eyes. This time when she found that vast [i]nothingness[/i] she stayed with it. It was like all of reality had been sucked out of the room with a vacuum. She could still feel and hear the world around her, she realized. But as Aya sat with the nothingness, it was like being met with a void - like suddenly being without a sensation that she didn't know she had. The longer Aya sat with it, the more the nothingness felt [i]solid[/i]. Like if she were to push against it, it would push back at her. Aya tilted her head in thought. The seconds ticked by into minutes. She's not sure when it appeared, but then within the vast nothing, there was [i]something[/i]. It was a tiny pinprick, like a black star in a white midnight sky, or the sound of a TV turned to the lowest possible volume. Aya focused on it. She pulled it closer (or moved herself towards it, she wasn't sure) and felt a building sense of triumph as it grew. Eyes still closed, Aya reached forward to blindly grab the pen, placing the point against the notebook. [indent][i][color=aquamarine]Vast, solid whiteness, like thick mist.[/color][/i][/indent] The something grew more and more distinct. It was [i]familiar[/i], she realized. It was the feeling of walking into someone's bedroom, and realizing that you can recognize their smell. But Aya couldn't place where she knew this from. Her eyebrows pulled together as she concentrated more. A figure was taking shape in the mist. It was still hazy, the edges indistinct, but it was a person. That much at least Aya could tell. Her mind reached for it, trying to will it into clarity. Then the figure seemed to shift in size and shape, growing slightly smaller. The smell of cigarettes mixed with vanilla and mint came to her, filling her with warmth - [i]love[/i]. But in the same breath, sadness bloomed in her chest like a flower. Soft hands with long, delicate fingers, brushed against Aya's cheek, and suddenly she wanted to cry. [i][color=aquamarine]I miss you.[/color][/i] The thought wasn't hers. She wrote again in the notebook below her previous words. [indent][i][color=aquamarine]A woman. Love. Loss.[/color][/i][/indent] Children's laughter chimed like a bell, distant through the haze. That feeling of love increased. There was joy. [i]Pride[/i]. But there was that same sense of loss, too. It intensified, mixing with shame, sharp as a knife. She'd [i]left[/i] them. [indent][i][color=aquamarine]A family. Young children left behind.[/color][/i][/indent] Why had she left? Her eyebrows pulled together as Aya tried to wade through the mist. Her family grew further and further away. Another sound started echoing through her mind: the low, quick thrum of a motorcycle. It sped at her, the engine rising in pitch, and Aya felt her adrenaline spike. Dread filled her in anticipation. The inevitable crash seemed to rock Aya’s entire being, and all she knew was the screech of metal against asphalt. Pain exploded in Aya’s body – she gasped, her eyes snapping open. She couldn’t breathe. She felt raw flesh down her arm and the side of her body, nerves blistering in the open air. She heard the snap of bones as pain shot through her fingers, arm, torso, leg. Her vision spotted white as tears sprang to her eyes. [indent][i][color=aquamarine]A motorcycle crash.[/color][/i][/indent] The letters were shaky, the pen tip digging too deep on the paper. The pain dulled, suddenly. Everything seemed far away again… misty. And then… [indent][i][color=aquamarine]Fire.[/color][/i][/indent] Suddenly she wasn’t in Professor Everose’s office anymore – she was in the Astral Plane, held aloft by one arm, the Sluagh’s claw plunging deep into her soul. It was like fire -- like [i]poison[/i] consuming her from the inside out, ripping her apart, and stitching her together. She couldn't see. She couldn't think. Her very marrow was magma, splintering her bones apart and flash boiling her blood. It all came from the monster's claws in her body, the [i]intrusion[/i] – the monster suddenly shifted, reforming itself. It burned like fire spread through her in her body – [i]she[/i] was fire, she was burning, she was rage, she was vengeful hate – The pen dropped from Aya’s hand. Her whole body was shaking, lips parted, voice caught in her throat. Tears sprang to her eyes as emotions overwhelmed her. Pain and fear and an overwhelming, inhuman anger filled her to the brim. It was too much. She couldn't tell which emotions were hers, but she couldn't handle them. She needed to escape, to get [i]away[/i] from the Sluagh and the fire. Aya latched onto the first thought that came to her - the family. She retreated to the woman and children, their love like a soothing balm. But it was different. Something had changed. Aya was a young woman, planning a funeral. It had been just last year - the minutia of sending out invitations and choosing a casket and picking flowers overwhelmed her. [i][color=aquamarine]Papa loved red ginger,[/color][/i] she thought to herself. [i][color=aquamarine]No casket. He wanted to be cremated.[/color][/i] But there wasn't even a body after the accident - there'd be no casket, no cremation, just an engraved headstone over an empty plot. How was she supposed to [i]do[/i] this, keep her head above water, raise three children without him, [i]be[/i] without him - [i][color=aquamarine]Papa is gone he's gone he's gone he's gone -[/color][/i] Aya was a child again and her mama was walking out the door, and she was so [i]angry[/i]. What kind of parent left their family behind? [i]How could she?[/i] How could her daddy just leave like that? Her brothers wouldn't stop crying, and Mommy had an empty, sad look in her eyes that never went away, and [i]she[/i] had to be the man of the house because Daddy [i]died[/i] and she hated him for it, she [i]hated[/i] her, Mama left and Papa died, and Aya was [i]alone[/i] - The funeral was small. She looked up at the adults she'd never met before wearing black suits and uniforms. At the front of the chapel was a table with Daddy's picture, surrounded by bouquets of white roses. Aya was made to stand beside it, carrying her baby brother as Mommy stood beside her and thanked strangers for taking the time to come. Aya looked over shoulder to look at the photo: a young man in uniform, with blond hair and a dour expression. Familiar, mismatched eyes stared back at her. Aya's hands clapped tight over her mouth as she held back a cry. Her eyes squeezed shut, tears trailing down her face. Sorrow was a violent thing that wracked her body. Aya shook her head as if she could deny it entry. It was too much grief for a single body, too many memories, and losses, and deaths, and Aya couldn’t tell which were hers anymore as they faded into each other. [color=aquamarine]"I can't, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I can't, I'm sorry -"[/color] The words repeated over and over again as Aya fought to control her weeping.[/hider]