[quote=@rebornfan320]
I feel no one does listen to me and is against me for not being positive or even having a different experience. I disagree with your words Ammo at least here as I feel like I need to be on the defensive and guarded or lash out because i feel like no one understands me or even gets what i feel as i feel people are trying to invalidate what I experienced and feel.
[/quote]

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Nobody, NOBODY invalidates what you feel. But we're telling you to stop using that as some kind of shield.

You are the proud owner of the single most posts in this thread (or at least a close second to Bango Bongo Banjo) and they ALL say the same thing.

No, actually, it's worse than that. When people tell you to use aesthetics, even just basic formatting touch-ups, you [url=https://www.roleplayerguild.com/posts/5199029]blow them off[/url]. When people say you need to think about your approach, you say you [url=https://www.roleplayerguild.com/posts/5199043]don't need to change at all[/url]. When you're told even staff on a different site had a problem with you, you [url=https://www.roleplayerguild.com/posts/5199138]blow them off as not understanding[/url] you... when, now, even a mod on this site felt the situation had escalated to the point they needed to give you a [url=https://www.roleplayerguild.com/posts/5199074]formal warning[/url].

But you know the post that really grinds my gears? [url=https://www.roleplayerguild.com/posts/5199079]I have Autism, guys.[/url] Yeah, guess what? You're clearly high-functioning enough to have conversations with other people. You know who else has that strain?

[u][i][b]Me.[/b][/i][/u] I have looping thought patterns and concentration problems as well as over-analyzing into the tiniest detail what people say and do.

Have you, in this entire thread, in my entire time on the forum, known me to use my different mental state to excuse my behaviour? No. Because unlike what you seem to exude, I have at least the bare minimum amount of maturity needed to see that fault is a two-way street. That for as much as I'd like to blame others, I am always, partially, to blame for everything that happens. Sometimes? Sometimes, it's even wholly to blame.

And you know what else, Reborn? Yes, you [i]feel[/i] things. I [i]feel[/i] things too. I feel anger, frustration, I want to lash out to those who have wronged me. Sometimes, I even do. It lends me some good catharsis if I'm fed up to high hell. But I am never, ever in the right for doing so. It is wrong to blame others for your shortcomings. It is wrong to superimpose what you feel onto another person.

You claim we do not understand you. This is by all measures and purposes false. We [i]understand[/i] how you feel. In lesser or greater quantities, each one of us has gone through what you've gone through. In fact, here's a quote from my own little essay on your for your viewing pleasure:

[quote=Ammokkx]
Let me tell you, I was 13 at a time. 13 year old Ammokkx was on Tumblr, hosting an RP blog. Tumblr RPs are 1x1. I had a bunch of partners and, yes, I did get ghosted. It felt like I was being ignored. I tried so desperately hard to get people's attention but it seemed like nobody wanted to RP with me. At the time, I didn't understand why.

But in retrospect, I saw that I was insufferable to those around me. I powergame'd. My OC's were mary sues. I was a huge dick to people. I'm amazed I still have friends from that era at all, but the long and short is that I was very much the cause of my own downfall... in hindsight. I didn't see it at the time, and you do not seem to see it now. I understand how you feel, Reborn. [u][i]Everyone[/i][/u] understands how you feel. Feel free to not believe us if you like. But know this; It is because we know how you feel that we are giving this advice in the hope that those feelings push you to be better than you are. Even if many have given up hope to that end.
[/quote]

This, right here, is me very blatantly telling you that I get it. That I have had the EXACT experience you describe, and yet you still dare claim I do not understand how you feel? Like i don't get "your side"?

No, Reborn. It is you who doesn't understand. I am sorry to say it, but you are downright delusional if you still refuse to recognize your own faults when so many people have pointed you to them.