Chen almost staggers backwards when Qiu breaks the embrace. She just looks at Qiu for a moment with big eyes, her lips starting to tighten. Then it bursts out of her.

"Why the fuck would I be anything [i]but[/i] miserable?!" She's shouting, and takes a deep breath. "This is impossible! It's all impossible. You're going to conquer the whole world and somehow I'm the only one that can stop you? Look at all this! But my parents and everyone in all the kingdoms expect me to be the chosen one and save them! If I go take time for myself, somebody will call me or come get me for slacking off and I'll be punished! Hell I'm already getting punished. You know I got Yue here by telling Yin to back off instead of teaming up with her because I actually [i]like[/i] Yue, and I'm going to get destroyed for it. Mommy Ysel is going to chew me out about how I don't prioritize my own kingdoms, then I'm going to end up with some kind of penance to Yin for mistreating a vassal, and [i]then[/i] I'm going to be sent right back out here until I manage to duel you for your shards. Even you want it, don't think I didn't notice that edge on the ship earlier, you wanted me to draw my sword and fight you right there and you used your shards to push for it. I still can't figure out why you aren't doing the same now!"

Chen pulls out her sword then, sliding it up fluidly from its sheathe on her thin dress (still the one that Qiu had given her save the scarf) and turning her eyes to the sparkling crystal. The lights within danced and spun madly, reflecting her own agitation. "I [i]like[/i] doing this, you know." Her voice gets quieter. "I like the teasing and the kidnapping and the, you know, the way we're all kind of friends, even the Princesses I haven't met in person yet. And I love flying and moving fast and dancing with the sword. Do you know, my parents gave me a little one, not very sharp, back when I was five, and I wouldn't let it go. I'd take it out and dance around my room at the Waterfall palace at night instead of going to bed. It had little crystal lights too. Ha, maybe it was a dagger for an older princess or something. When it was dark and I danced with it, the lights would leave faint lines like bright glowing ribbons as I twirled it around." 

There's a few tears forming in Chen's eyes, but voice grows harder and angrier as she looks back up from the sword to Qiu. "But you're just like everybody else. Once I picked this thing up, all anybody sees is a blade with an adept hand. A sword makes me so special to everyone! Oh Chen, she's our champion! Oh she can be such a good rival. Oh please, work hard every day and be our savior! Nobody cares what [i]I[/i] want because it would be such a fucking waste of my talent to do anything else!"

Chen wipes away hot tears with her silk sleeve, little dots of water darkening the fabric. She slips the sword back into its sheathe smoothly, the skill so worked into her muscle memory that even shaking with muffled sobs, the movement doesn't falter.