[color=darkgray][center][color=CA4949][h1][b]S P I D E R - M A N[/b][/h1][/color][sup][b][color=677d9b]V O I C E M A I L[/color][/b][/sup][/center]
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[indent][i][You’ve reached the message bank of: 9-1-7-0-3-1-1-2-6-5. Please leave a message after the tone.][/i]

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Hey, Gwen. 

I tried to take a break from this-- from talking to you. Leaving messages on a dead girl’s phone doesn’t exactly scream “healthy”, does it? 

… Sorry. That wasn’t… sorry. 

I’ve been feeling pretty bad, lately. You know that feeling I’d always tell you about? That dense emptiness. Hollow chest, heavy insides. I dunno what to call it. Not anxiety, that’s-- that’s not right. I dunno, I can’t really articulate it that well. Words don’t come easy for me, I don’t think.

I was doing good for a while, too. Going out for some air when I needed it. Talking to someone when I felt like calling you. But here I am. 

I don’t get it, Gwen. I have so many people who love me and support me, but I-- I’ve never felt so alone. How do you figure that? How does that work?

I miss you. Everywhere I look, I’m reminded of you. Harry reminds me of you, MJ reminds me of you, May reminds me of you-- my suit, the bridge, all of it, [i]all[/i] [i]of it[/i] makes me think about you. And I’ve gotten used to it, I think. I’ve come to terms with the fact that you’re not coming back. It doesn’t feel any better, but it doesn’t feel any worse, either. 

It’s easier to wake up these days. To get up, you know? And I think-- I don’t think I’m angry anymore. I was [i]so [/i]angry. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t… I’ll never forgive Norman. I won’t. I don’t have it in me. You were here, and then you weren’t, and… and he’s why. But I’m not angry anymore. It was too much. Being angry, [i]all [/i]the time. It wasn’t healthy. It wasn’t…

Yeah.

Oh! We were at Stan’s the other day, me and Harry, looking at comics-- y’know, trying to take each other’s minds off things, hiding in a quiet part of the city. And there’s this kid there with his mom, maybe six or seven years old, the smallest little guy you’ve ever seen -- and he walks up to the guy at the counter, and asks for the new [i]Squadron Supreme[/i]. The guy gives it to him, and his mom comes over with her wallet, but the kid says, “No, I wanna pay.” 

And he takes out loose change from his pockets, and he gives it to the man at the counter. It wasn’t enough to pay for the comic, but it was-- I dunno.

You would’ve thought it was cute.

I… I had things I wanted to talk about. That feeling in my chest, other stuff. But it doesn’t-- it doesn’t feel right. Not right now. 

I think I need to move around for a bit. It’s cold up here. The view’s nice, but it’s cold, and I just… I need to move. I might go to Central Park. It’ll only take me two minutes. 

Hey, remember our first date there? It was freezing. So cold that my hands went numb. 

That was my excuse to hold yours, at least. 

It was a good date. I loved it. 

I love you. 

I hope you’re safe, wherever you are. I hope you’re not scared anymore. I hope… I hope you’re getting these, somehow.

Bye, Gwen. Talk to you soon.
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