... Okay, update ... the murder turtle DID just ... eat Kevin, who was interviewing to be our part time cook ... but I mean bears murder people all the time and we don't call them murder bears! He's just a turtle with a startling capacity for murder, it doesn't DEFINE him!

BREAKING EDIT: We've just discovered that Kevin, in hopes of landing the job, was wearing [i]Mes Erables[/i] from Dior's 'Wild Breakfast' line of men's colognes. At this point, can you even blame the murder turtle ...

As just a kind of side note, I only recently realized that I edited out all the parts about the cafe/inn being placed onto the back of a Gargantuan Snapping Tortoise which Madeline had misidentified as a Murder Turtle, which is the size of a normal turtle but much more nefarious in nature, and is completely different from a tortoise.