[b][CENTER]FOUR YEARS AGO[/CENTER][/B]

[i]Rob’s stood a hair’s breadth from the floor-to-ceiling windows that lined all three sides of the rented penthouse suite. 

Looking down at the Las Vegas skyline, he could make out little more than bleary lights, glares, and the tiny movement of cars below. 

“You’ll get arrested for that, you know?” 

The voice came from behind him. He turned to see Adrianna on the bed--her back on the headboard of the bed, glaring at him from behind a crossed foot. 

“For looking at Vegas?”

“For looking at Vegas [u]naked[/u], Rob.” 

Rob looked down at himself. He had completely forgotten that in fact, both of them were naked. 

How long had it been since they had f–

“Come over, idiot.”

Adrianna snapped him out of it. In between anything-but-sober sex, she had a strange mean streak–as if she was imitating playful snark but forgot the playful part of it. 

Still, obliging, Rob returned to her in the bed and lay with his head on her belly. She cradled it, and the two continued: 

“Always lost in that big, dumb head of yours, huh?” 

It was a funny enough statement from her, because at the present moment, there was essentially nothing in Rob’s head. Just a cloudy mix of vague memories and pleasure. 

“What?” he replied, “Like you never think?” 

“What’s there to think about?” came a short reply. “None of this is rocket science, and frankly, it’s a bit of a turn-off. You’re probably thinking about her again, aren’t you?”

“Oh, really?” Rob shot back. He wasn’t interested in taking that one lying down. He moved up from her belly and slipped himself underneath a leg. “You think I’m thinking about Jane, huh?” 

“Oh, we can say her name, now?” Adrianna tried to counter, but her shaky breath gave her away. She knew what game Rob was starting. “I thought it was off-limits.” 

“I haven’t thought about her in years,” Rob replied. He placed one hand on either of her knees and positioned himself between them. “It’s Mae I’m thinking of when we fuck.”

“Oh, silly me,” Adrianna replied. Rob could feel every muscle tense up beneath his fingers. “I should’ve known that’s all this was.” 

Rob lowered his head towards her as he spoke–never breaking eye contact as his hands slid upward. “How about I think about who I want, and you think about who you want, yeah?”

“Please, shut the fuck up,” Adrianna finally broke. Rob felt a hand grasp the back of his head and push down, hard. [/i]

[CENTER][B]PRESENT DAY[/B][/CENTER]

The world rushed back to Rob as he broke the surface tension and gasped for air. 

His head spun on a swivel, scouring every inch of the rental’s backyard.

No one was out here. Not yet. 

[i]Why was he thinking about [u]that?[/u][/i] 

He pushed himself from the pool and snagged his flask by his shirt and phone. He took several long swigs as he plopped down on the pool chair and opened his phone. 

One missed call, and one message. Both from Mae. 

[u]Just calling to say hi. We won’t be able to make the Elle FaceTime appointment tomorrow. Mastering a few tracks. Does the day after work?[/u]

Rob rolled his eyes, and tapped out a fast response. [u]It works. Happy to hear you’re mastering tracks. Let’s not miss this next call.[/u]

It was the second time she had delayed a FaceTime call with Elle. 

Within seconds, a response: [u]You can always come home, you know.[/u]

At that, he tossed the phone aside. He wasn’t going to play semantics with an ex-wife who was doing the same thing he was doing. She knew this was happening, and she knew it was happening first. 

He tried his best to put it aside, finished his flask, and went back into the pool. 

[i]Why was he thinking about Adrianna? About Mae?[/i]

Those thoughts kept intruding on him as he waited for Jane and the others to come out. He swam laps to try to distract himself, but it didn’t seem to be working.

[i]What was it about now? About when he decided he was finally done trying to feign friendship when he knew he felt more strongly about J?[/i] 

He came up from the water again to see her, coming out from inside, setting her crutches down. 

Maybe it was because he had a kid now. An ex-wife. [i]Baggage.[/i]

As the Mars Volta song came on, he turned his attention to the song and the words. Better that than what he had in mind.

[i]”I thought you were going out with Adrianna tonight.”[/i]

Without thinking, Rob laughed at the suggestion, before stopping himself.

“I’m sorry,” he started, “I think she’d like that, but no.” His eyes turned again to the crutches. “Swimming should help get weight off that foot, yeah?” 

He moved to almost cradle her in the water before stopping himself. Muscle memory kicking in from all those years ago. He tried his best to play it off as repositioning in the water, but he doubted it worked very well. 

On the other end of the house, he heard a car drive off. “I take it Austin didn’t want to go swimming?” 

With J now here, in front of him–her dark eyebrows floating above those unmistakable eyes–the intrusive thoughts seemed to fade away.

This was home, in its own way. This was comfortable. 

Rob moved to the edge of the pool and snagged his pack, quickly lighting up a cigarette. He offered her one before leaning back.

He panged slightly with anxiety–he wanted to bring up this morning–but when he looked up to her, he calmed down just a bit.

This was Jane. He [i]knew[/i] her. What was there to be scared of?

[i]Rejection.[/i]

The word rang in his head, briefly, before fading out.

“Oh,” he started, “I wanted to say I’m sorry it’s been weird, too. But today was real fuckin’ productive. I uh... I slept well last night. Real well. I hope you did too.” He didn’t even try to hide his subtext. 

Sure, he could have been blunter. But he at least wanted to offer J an out if she wanted to avoid it.