The color rises in Han’s cheeks. And along with it, the fires of righteous indignation.

“Screw that! I don’t gotta pick either of those!”

And if she had access to both her arms, she’d be crossing them [i]so seriously[/i] right now.

“So what if girls’re pretty? Nothing wrong with liking pretty girls! That don’t mean I go around stealing them, huh? What, you think I see a river that looks neat, I set up shop there? Tell everybody it’s mine now? Charge admission?!”

“Oh, n-no, no, of course not.” Lotus’ soothing, innocent voice flows like a neat river, like her soft hand stroking hers. “But, what if that river was the most pretty you’d ever seen? Who could blame you for losing your senses? It happens all the time-”

“I said I’m not picking either and that’s [i]final.[/i]” Han huffs. “Nobody back home was pretty enough to make me go N’yari on them. I mean,” and the fires rise a touch higher. “Sure, they weren’t [i]not[/i] pretty, I still had eyes y’know. But come on, you think there’s gonna be somebody in some nowhere Highland town who can compete with a demigod?! Give me a break.”

And that ought to clear everything up perfectly. Nice try, life, but you’re gonna have to do better than that to get one over Han of the Highlands.

[The wise and articulate Han of the Highlands enjoys a free XP]