[quote=@Squashedquatch] [hider=WIP] [img]https://i.pinimg.com/736x/93/82/68/938268680e96bba36644822cf51fef56.jpg[/img] [i]"Only those faster than time can escape my lightning fast shots!"[/i] Personal Information Name: Icaros Moriah Jones Epithet: Storm Surgeon Race: Skypiean Gender: Male Blood Type: X Age: 27 Height: 6'3 Weight: 170 pounds Role In Crew: Sniper Bounty: 25,000,000 Dream: To live with the least fear possible Personality: Icarus is a bit up in your face, to say the least. I mean, when you're defeated, that is. Any other time he's most likely up on the mast, taking electric potshots at his and the crew's enemies, while trying not to hit anyone else that [i]is[/i] on his side. It's no big deal if he does though, or so he thinks, being very carefree about his fighting style and always finding new ways to fight using his very unique powers. He is however, a very good talker and can usually discern the motives of those he speaks to using his acute Observation Haki. People who try to seem smart often end up making him kind of pissed off, and anyone that would come to pirates for help expecting them to just drop whatever they are doing to assist will get a piece of his mind. He has a special hate for marines, as he was born about two weeks before the time Portgaz D Ace was and got to see his mother brutally killed by a Marine overly excited to do a good job and kill any woman that had given birth to someone so near the time given as to the birth of the son of the King of Pirates. He doesn't understand the stigma pirates face, instead seeing himself, his friends, and what he does as just another activity. A way to live life that would let him have the fun he always wanted. To have a real family even if they really aren't related. His favorite activities are break-dancing, singing, and shocking other people using static generated by his power. Biography: Ok so he was born. (I would have loved to gone into deeper detail about why but it doesn't matter because that part doesn't add anything to his personality or do anything related to the story, so I'm skipping the filler) Combat Information Combat Role: Sniper Devil Fruit Name: Shock-Shock Fruit/Shokku-Shokku no mi Devil Fruit Type: Paramythia Devil Fruit Breakdown: He can summon lightning from his fingertips, and control the length as well as the height. Using more than one finger powers up the attack by how many fingers he uses. (for example, one attack that needs two fingers would have 2x the power) There is a lot he can do with this, and various hand movements are vital to the usage of them. This has a cooldown, as once he uses a finger too much, it will become blackened and unusable without medical attention. Haki Prowess: Buso: C (Can use Haki to extend the use of his fingerguns, and is also vital in the use of Coated Thunder) Ken: B COC: None Physical Capabilities: Can breakdance and flip, which leads to some of his most powerful moves. Fighting Style: Sniping Equipment: Has a couple of unactivated sonic bombs which can release an ear-piercing sound that on beings with elevated hearing can break Observation. Activated by electricity, but you are able to move them and they become unusable in water Special Techniques: Coated Thunder/Kōtingu sa reta sandā: Coats his hands in Haki and shoots through a hole he makes with his fingers (think of the O.K. symbol), coating his bolts in Haki and adding to their power and piercing. X-Wave/Kurosuu~ēb: A move in which he charges his lightning to maximum length and releases them, resulting in two sideways waves of electricity Static Boom/Seiteki būmu: A move where he charges electricity in both hands, makes a fist shape with them, and slams them together. That releases a electric wave that paralyzes anyone with a lower Haki level than him, but the recoil is so strong that it breaks at least one of his hands as of now. Turntable Shock/Tāntēburushokku: A move where Icaros does a spin while rapidly shooting, does an X-shaped handstand, then pushes himself up from it while releasing a powered up X-Wave. Radiance/Kagayaki: Charges his hands all the way up, coats them in Buso, and then jumps, only to bring down his hands upon the head of his opponent. To give you an idea of what this means, imagine he did this to an elephant. The elephant would fall over and be unable to move for a good 5-10 minutes. This is a last resort, as while it doesn't fry his hands, it makes his power unusable for a long time. Since it is a physical attack and he is not physically strong, it can be blocked by Buso Haki higher than C Tier Unseen Electricity/Mienai Denki: He unleashes a bullet with the weakest charge possible, and in doing so it becomes almost unseeable. When it hits, however, since it is weak it only causes momentary paralysis and can be completely negated by Busoshoku Haki no matter what level. Miscellaneous Information Theme Song: RUN - CG5 VA: Whoever did Paulie in the English dub of One Piece [/hider] Gonna work on this, just submitting it so It doesn't disappear! [/quote] Yeah... I get that this is a WIP, but there are [i]already[/i] glaring problems with it. ... I'll address the fact that you put Sniper in both roles first. If you want your guy to strictly be there as a sniper (which I'm guessing you do), then your crew role would be Enforcer. Just so you know, the Enforcers are the primary combatants of a crew, and they're there to engage the enemy, protect the rest of the crew etc.; in other words, they're pretty much the muscle. I won't harp too much on the fact that you also just put Sniping in the Fighting Style segment cause that [i]does[/i] scream placeholder, although I will say that if you don't expect your guy to fight all that differently from the usual sniper, you might be better off removing the field in its entirety. ... The second issue is your mention of Portgas D. Ace. I'm not sure how I feel about canon characters even being referenced in a cursory manner, and I'm certainly against the idea of them being personally interacted with. I'd suggest removing all mention of Ace just to be safe :/ ... That's all for now. If you need any help, just ask