Quinn's head was churning as she walked slowly—slowly—to Dahlia's room. It felt almost odd to be back in the Aerie. Haunting, almost. The cold white hallways felt like an artifact from a previous time, and it didn't feel like anything outside of medical even [i]existed[/i] yet. She would enjoy sleeping in her own bed again for sure, but everything just seemed like there was a hazy filter of unreality spread across it.

Perhaps she just didn't want to think about what she had to say.

She'd had two days in medical. Two days of stewing with her thoughts. Two days of the secret burning a hole in her stomach. She hadn't told anybody yet. Dahlia should be the first to know. She was the one that Quinn felt the worst about. Her best friend. Her dad. Her home. Quinn had torn them all from her, just by [i]being[/i] there. Her heart hurt more than any time since she'd first woken up on the Aerie all those weeks ago.

She'd thought she'd made her peace with Dahlia hating her after this. With Besca not talking to her. But the more she thought about it, the worse everything grew.

She stepped forward. Besca had never been such a force of [i]anxiety[/i] before. When she'd asked her to come to see Dahlia, her voice had shaken so much she could barely get it out. It certainly wasn't any better now.

[i]Knock, knock.[/i] "[color=ffe63d]Deelie, it's—it's me. They let me out. I'm coming in.[/color]"

She opened the door, awkward, quiet, shivering slightly despite the pleasant temperature, and sat down at the foot of Dahlia's bed. She looked at Dahlia. Looked at Besca. The pain in her eye was visible, even from a moderate distance. She opened her mouth. Closed it again.

She'd thought so much about what she could say to Dahlia. She'd spent days thinking about it. And she still didn't know.

"[color=ffe63d]I—[/color]"

Another pause.

"[color=ffe63d]...If you hate me after this I won't blame you.[/color]"

She hugged herself close. "[color=ffe63d]Before you got there, Deelie...the Modir with the sword. It—it [i]talked[/i] to me.[/color]" A shaky breath. "[color=ffe63d]It knew my [i]name[/i].[/color]" She'd said as much to Besca. She looked at her again. Back to Dahlia. Her breathing accelerated. One breath. Two. Three. Still fast and hard. Wasn't enough. Her vision began to blur around the edges. Her heart was pounding, up in her throat. Her voice sounded like it always did just before she broke into tears. But she held them back. She needed to.

"[color=ffe63d]And it told me...it said it had—[/color]"

She covered her mouth. Closed her eye so she wouldn't need to see their faces, forced the rest of it out.

"[color=ffe63d]It had found me there. And—and—[/color]" Her voice dropped to a whisper. It was all she could manage. "[color=ffe63d]And that it had found me—in Runa.[/color]"

She quaked silently. A tear started to roll down her cheek, and she hated herself for it. 

"[color=ffe63d]My fault. It was my fault my fault [i]all my fault.[/i][/color]" The hand over her mouth slid up to cover her eye and socket, revealing teeth clenched so tight she felt like they would shatter like sugar glass. "[color=ffe63d]I brought them to Hovvi. They were looking—[i]hunting me[/i]. Everyone who died there—your dad and Safie and—and EVERYONE. THOUSANDS. IT'S [i]ALL MY FAULT.[/i][/color]"

She stood up violently, revealing an eye puffy and red with held-back tears. "[color=ffe63d]I—I should go,[/color]" she stammered. "[color=ffe63d]I'm sorry. I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm so [i]so sorry.[/i][/color]"

She ran for the door.