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well since you brought up that point I'll one last attempt to clarify why I think the idea could still be done respectfully.

It would of been a fully conscious choice, it's just that instead of her having been presenting for a while and being fully used to that before hand. the whole magical cult idea that he was getting presented with in the dream would of been the impetus that gets him over the last of his reservations, and would be ready and wanting to present after that dream and gets what is needed to present properly on the way to the tomb before setting off.

and you can't tell me a "young, beautiful angel. [who] imprints upon them a burning desire to locate her Tomb" to recover an amulet wouldn't seem like the start of a fellowship or a guild that's going to take them away from their current lives to start a new more exciting one. and since he's going to be building a new life anyways perfect time change things in this new life that would of been much more difficult to change in the old one, gender being one of those things. we could have him be dressing up and acting the part on their trip to the tomb, as I'm assuming they aren't just zombie walking all the way there, but rather it's an urge to get there that put's it's self on the top of their list. with the idea that instead of having to deal with the issue of everyone knows him from before, she can make a first impression on most of them. As lets face it aside from her friend, she hasn't met most of the others also coming for the amulet yet right?

there would be plenty of time for her to reflect and acknowledge how she feels and why she chose this. As just assumed that would likely be the first thing that gets brought up after the change, is how she's feeling about the change and that would segway in to them reflecting on her life and how things where and how she wants things to go now. and it would actually make more sense to have that reflection be "on camera" if she has just started presenting as opposed to her already in the swing of things and likely already had talked that out with her friend before the start of the rp.  Also Culture shocks don't have to be a bad thing, or something she didn't know about. As hearing, or reading about it is one thing, having it happen to you is another.

any if you still don't think I'd do that kind of character justice then that's fine, you don't have to say any more on why.  I'll just play a female from birth character. and we can move on either way.
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actually never mind that, I'm done arguing over that point. I'll just play a female from birth character. and we can move on.