[i][b]—— Earth-F67X: North Capital City, Chinatown[/b][/i]

[i]"AAAH! How dare you collar and chain me like a dog to the scrub-n-tug!"[/i] gurgles Mateo from the spa, his voice reverberating through the skyway connecting the highrise to the warehouse. Seussian contraptions flail about on pneumatic hinges from apertures in the bathhouse wall, erupting torrents of sudsy soap froth and scourging him with [i]nzw[/i]-Martex antimicrobial microfiber tassels. Eyes stinging, he can't even decipher color or shape, just that, through his clenching eyelids, everything is shining bright red.

Something pinches his neck, inside the collar. Hot, heavy, and soaking wet, he slams his fist down on the floor.

[i]"Fesyen, I'm going to kill y-arrooooo! Arrrrf! Arrrf! A-wooooo!"[/i]

He pants, ears flicking back against his skull. Suddenly, he feels his tailbone twist back on itself, unfurling just above his asshole, and his joints reverse. 

[i]"What the—grrrr! Arrrrrroooof!"[/i]

A spray of fresh cold water slaps against his face, clearing away the soap. His tongue slaps out, licking some beads from his cold wet snout. Then, he sees his reflection. [i]Oh fuck no, that ain't me! I'm not a fucking kinker, Fesyen![/i] Staring back at him are twin chocolate eyes framed in a dense light gray-brown furry fox face, a bright red flecktarn collar around his neck with a blank name tag, and the body of a chilla.

[center][b]… Ϟ[/b][/center]
Fesyen refocuses on his second guest of—well, whatever the time be. Han, the Nazi regalia aficionado. 

[i]"Wel~l,"[/i] Fesyen contemplates, reaching both his hands out to close Han's own, hiding in her grip the Iron Cross, [i]"I'll take care of these rare and precious boots. You, meanwhile, may return when you have the bits. As for a fixer, well, I'm not tha~at well connected, bu~ut I hear if you goosestep your way down to New Venice you'll find some luck. Follow the scarlet swatches, once you get down there. When you feel you've found the kingdom of nerds, you're there. Then again, if the suffering of xenos is not to your liking, maybe you'll find something more agreeable at 4 Pennsylvania Plaza."[/i]

He turns around and scampers up to his work dais, clutching her boots. 

[i]There'll be a buyer for these if she can't get the bits, I'm sure.[/i]