[right][sub]TIMESTAMP: After Crashing Tide, Part 2 (*Finale Post)
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[color=lightgray][indent][indent]Clay lay in his hospital bed, staring up at the ceiling. He never liked hospitals though he knew with his chosen career path he would probably be seeing them a lot and should likely reserve a room. Wednesday Davies had been in the room shortly before to give Clayton his full diagnosis. Most of it was just big words he didn’t understand but from what he did get, he was just pretty battered up and wouldn’t need surgery. That was a plus. He always knew Russell could throw a punch but he didn’t know he could hit like a train.

He was doing what he could to push past the thoughts of his old friends and the drama that had unfolded over the last two days but he was fighting a losing battle. Clay wanted to speak to Jamie and Russel again, he wanted to talk to David and find out everything but at this point it didn’t matter. Caitlin had spoken her truth and the world now knew. The truth was out and he had done what he had set out to do. He moved his eyes to look at the door as the handle began to jostle. A welcome reprieve from his thoughts…

[center][h3][b]~[/b][/h3][/center]

When she had reached room thirteen, on the second floor, Cat was scolding herself with how ill prepared she was. If she had stopped for a moment she could’ve made him his favorite sandwich or at least have something to offer, like flowers. All she had was herself and a heart overwhelmed, leading her out of the storm and to her peace. To the man she couldn’t stop thinking about. No man had ever made her feel the way Clay did. This was unlike any love she experienced. This was a different kind of love. The love she wanted her whole life yet never thought she’d ever have. 
 
Truth be told, Tomasso never did love her and she never loved him. Her father gave neither of them a choice. A trusted ally of the Esposito family knocked his daughter up out of wedlock? Scandalous but not a mistake he couldn’t fix. He made it clear they would suffer the consequences and learn to love one another. That love never did blossom no matter how hard she tried. He was a selfish man, her rapist and if anything, he found it as the perfect business arrangement to indirectly attach him to a powerful family. 

Gabriel was her first, young and innocent. He, along with Bobby and Lydia, were her OG friends after she moved to Eden. Then followed Jonah Steen and the rest of the Heartbreakers. They found an escape with one another, pushed their family problems aside to hold each other, love each other. Sadly that was short lived because his mother, Temperance, slut shamed her to filth and said she would never accept a harlot like her. Gabriel didn’t want to put her through that uphill battle when she had enough going on at home so he broke things off. After graduation, he left town. 

Dexter, the man she saw not too long ago this very day, was her second, exhilarating and gut-wrenching. He unleashed a whole different side in her, purely intoxicating and she was obsessed. There was great pain in their story but if it wasn’t for him, she doubted she would be as persistent in proving people wrong. She was smart. She was strong. She was beautiful. All things she tried to be everyday while keeping her whole family united and standing tall. He made her hit rock bottom but then because of her lowest point, she was given Sofia and gained purpose beyond belief. Because of her lowest point, she was saved. 

Her third? Clay. He came to her blindly and out of nowhere. No matter how many walls she tried to put up, he broke them down. All her defenses, they didn’t matter, because he wanted her for her. He saw her and only her. He undressed her body and her soul, saw beauty in her imperfections, and loved her. He loved her. All she could do was get lost in his eyes as he got lost in her’s. All she could do was be undoubtedly and devotedly his even if she still couldn’t say it outloud. Even if she couldn’t tell him how she felt. Even if she was scared. 

Why was holding her back? 

[color=9f1b3e]“Hey Casanova,”[/color] her throat was still closed up from all the crying, the great tremor having overtaken her in front of Sinclair’s. Placing her purse down on a chair, mustering whatever little strength she had to put a smile on, her makeup flaky and her eyes a little red and swollen, Cat turned and eased her way to him. [color=9f1b3e]“Looks like you had one hell of a day? Or two?” [/color]

The elation on Clay’s soul when he saw Cat walk in, was better than any adrenaline boost or morphine drip. He pushed himself up a little to greet her, wincing ever so lightly. [color=BCDD81]“Hey Kitty.”[/color] He smiled that stupid goofy smile and brushed his long shaggy hair as he looked at the love of his life. [color=BCDD81]“This is nothing. I got it worse when we played Cambridge in the fifteen state championship.”[/color] There it was. That humor. [color=BCDD81]“Now get your sexy ass over here, I may look like shit but I can still rock your world.”[/color]

Rolling her eyes at him, always one to lighten the mood, Cat buried her creeping anxiety and focused on the present. Sauntering to his bedside, she gently reprimanded, [color=9f1b3e]“You shouldn’t be moving so much.”[/color] Sitting down on the bed, she surveyed the bruises and the cuts. She worriedly scanned his face and his body. He went through so much and she wasn’t there for him. Hesitantly, she reached for his hair and brushed another strand out of his face, leaning forward but keeping her touch to a minimal. She didn’t want to hurt him. [color=9f1b3e]“Is there anything you need from me?”[/color]  

[color=BCDD81]“Well now you’re just teasing me. How am I not supposed to say something dirty?”[/color] Clay could feel the goosebumps raise all over his body upon Cat’s touch. He quickly grabbed the hand she had by his face and pulled it to his chest. He thrust himself forward and with his other hand he captured the back of his love’s head, pulling her into a deep, passionate kiss. He had been aching for days to feel those lips and taste her flavor. It was what kept him going through his fight. He had to get back to his Kitty, he had to and now he had. He was home.

Stealing her breath away, Cat’s heart beat wildly as they kissed. She could only take sips of air as he held her firmly, grasping her hair. The frigid air of the hospital swirled around her prompting her to press herself into him, into his warmth. His body heat. Her hungry mouth, eager appetite, and heavy heart melded into his. She had spent the last two days full of ups and downs. A roller coaster of emotions. It was nice to forget and just focus on him. He didn’t wince once as they kissed which helped ease her shoulders and the tip of her tongue brushed his lips and slipped into his mouth. She clung to him with longing, held onto him for her life, and desperately explored his soul through his eyes. Shuddering, noticing how overcome by desire she was getting, Cat pulled away. [color=9f1b3e]“Baby,”[/color] she gasped for air. [color=9f1b3e]“Lay down. Rest.”[/color] Flustered, she adjusted herself, crossing her legs, [color=9f1b3e]“Or at least tell me, did everything go okay? Are you okay?” [/color]

Clay leaned back, a touch out of breath from the heat of their kiss. He looked at the concerned look on his Kitty’s face and reached out to the back of her neck. [color=BCDD81]“Lie with me.”[/color] He guided her down with his hand until she was fully stretched out on the bed with him, snuggled into him. Their bodies were woven together like a tapestry. [color=BCDD81]“I’ll be ok eventually.”[/color] He wasn’t going to lie to Cat, he couldn’t and he wouldn’t. He would not let this relationship, the one that he had wanted all of his life, to be stained black with an untruth. [color=BCDD81]“It was a lot but I did it. With the help of some good people, I got it done. All I want now is you, to be with you and let the last two days rest.”[/color]

She was relieved he got what he needed done and that he acknowledged that the whole experience wasn’t something he’d get over immediately. That felt like a big step for him and she was happy he trusted her enough to admit his internal struggle. Maybe she should do the same? There was so much that happened with her that she didn’t even know where to start but just starting somewhere was a good first step. [color=9f1b3e]“I,”[/color] Cat looked up at him, cautiously thinking of the right words to say or even how to express herself in a way that showed him she cared about him, [color=9f1b3e]“saw my ex today.”[/color] 

Looking away, tracing her finger on his chest, Cat pressed on, [color=9f1b3e]“He came to my shop and by ex I mean the guy that ripped my heart up into a million pieces in highschool. He wants to have a sit and talk with me and our kids… this Sunday. Sofi kind of put me in a weird place where I felt obligated to invite him to a horsemen scrimmage. Do you want to come with me?”[/color] This was a huge step for her. Not only did she not want to hide Clay anymore but she wanted him at her side when she was facing one of the ghosts of her past. She hoped this honesty showed how much he meant to her. 

Well this was a turn up. This was Cat’s way of reaching out and trying with him. The walls were slowly coming down and it elated him. Still, Clay had to think this through. She wanted to go public and she wanted to do so in a way that certainly wasn’t subtle. In fact it was like crashing through a window with a machine gun. The fact that he wanted the kids to be present calmed Clay’s cops instincts. [color=BCDD81]“I would love to come with you but I don’t think coming is what you need.”[/color] He gently caressed her auburn locks and pressed a soft kiss to Cat’s forehead. [color=BCDD81]“This is something you need closure on. Me being there will just be a distraction and will take away from you getting what you want.”[/color]

After their argument the day before, Clay realized that he needed to fully give everything he was to Cat and give her all of his trust. [color=BCDD81]“I can be there in the background, if it’ll make you feel safer but I won’t sit on the table, I think we should make our first glamorous appearance somewhere low key. I don’t know, maybe we get someone to restart the boy toy auction and you bet a few million on my fine ass.”[/color]

Cat squinted her nose at that suggestion. [color=9f1b3e]“With how many girls you’ve been with? I think not.”[/color] Her mood was lighthearted and spirited. She felt secure with herself, like she and Clay reached a breakthrough in their relationship. [color=9f1b3e]“We’ll figure something out. Thank you for trusting me…”[/color] she had so much to say and still didn’t know if it was too much to throw on him while he  was in pain on a hospital bed. Still, it was time to follow her impulse. Turning herself so her stomach was facing the bed but still leaned up against him, she bit her bottom lip before asking, [color=9f1b3e]“I know what got you here is because of your duty to this town as a protector and all but I’ve been thinking. Do you think… I could be a good cop? I could protect too?”[/color]

Was his morphine drip too high? Did he hear that right? She wanted to be a cop? That was definitely a new lyric to their song. [color=BCDD81]“Baby, you’d be the best cop.”[/color] He responded with confidence. [color=BCDD81]“For so many reasons. One, you’d look crazy hot in the uniform. Arrest me anytime mama. Two, you’re already a protector as a Mom. You have the instinct inside you and you always have. Three, you can be downright terrifying. Instilling fear in the hearts of all without ever taking your gun out of your holster.”[/color] Clay looked down at her and smiled. [color=BCDD81]“If this is something you wanna do, Cat, I’ll do whatever I can to make it happen.”[/color]

[color=9f1b3e]“Oh good,”[/color] Cat’s first tear broke free, in the arms of her lover. Burying her head in his chest, inhaling his natural scent, the Italian woman cried into his shirt. She wasn’t uncontrollably sobbing like she had done with Eleanor. Her tears were a gentle stream, delicately soaking his shirt. Once she reached for his hand so her’s was intertwined with his, she closed her eyes and listened to his breathing, his heartbeat, and the noises of nature coming from the open window. 

Everything built up to this moment in time and Cat couldn’t hold back the crashing tide of her feelings. In love and in loneliness, from high to low tide, she was turning with the waves. They were crashing over her, fiercely and flooding throughout every fiber of her being. Finally, in her life she found the soul that paired with her. The piece that fits perfectly.  He was the reason. In one gaze, he captured her soul. It was a blessing and a curse to feel so deeply for someone but she wouldn’t trade that for the world. All her hardships, all her struggles, and all her sufferings led her here. Now she could confidently say her reality was better than her dreams. 

[color=9f1b3e]“I was afraid you would think I was, or am, in over my head.”[/color] He believed in her and her want, no, her need to succeed. He believed in her and wanted to be there with her every step of the way. [color=9f1b3e]“I want it, Clay.”[/color] She released his hand once more to wipe her face, pulling herself up so she was closer to his eyes, caressing him. [color=9f1b3e]“I want change and not because someone told me this is what needs to be done. Not because it’s what I’m supposed to do. Not because someone ripped my dreams away from me and forced my hand. I want this, for me. I want to be something more, and I won’t get that if I don’t go for it.”[/color] Subconsciously, she reverted back to a bad habit and apologized for speaking her truth, [color=9f1b3e]“I’m sorry. I know this a lot. I’ve had too much on my mind lately.” [/color]

[color=BCDD81]“Well then it’s a good thing you have me to talk to isn’t it?”[/color] Clay responded with a light kiss on Cat’s forehead. This was all news to him but that was ok, she was entitled to her secrets and her musings as long as they weren’t harmful. Wanting and needing to protect and serve was definitely not harmful nor was it hurting. He placed his hand on her warm, tear stained cheek and looked deep into his Kitty’s pretty hazel eyes. [color=BCDD81]“You’re not alone Cat, not any more.”[/color] Clayton brushed her cheek with his thumb. [color=BCDD81]“I love you and that will never change.”[/color]

Her gentle and wounded soul flowered on her cheeks, like pink perfection. He was able to say he loved her so casually and so openly. She wanted to know what he loved about her and why he chose her above all other women that ever did love him. She knew some of the reasons like her smoky voice or how she looked into his eyes. Even with her knowing he just did, she liked hearing it. She liked being reassured that his love was her’s and no one else’s. She liked hearing his voice and how much he wanted her. She liked feeling wanted and not just any kind of want. She liked how insatiably hungry he was for her company and how beautiful she was in his eyes.  

Today she felt the fear of not being able to touch him. The fear of not having a chance to hear his voice say those three words to her ever again. The fear of him dying. She didn’t realize at the time, when they were dancing at the Afterlife, in sync and the spotlight shining, how her world would never be the same. Not only did she surrender herself to the music but it was in that dance she saw the rest of her life with one man. She surrendered herself to their song.  There was no doubt she was scared to walk out of this hospital without him understanding that the feelings were mutual. There was no doubt that she struggled saying such a simple phrase because whenever she did someone would always blow out her flame. There was no doubt he made her feel unbelievably raw and surreal that she could barely keep it together when he held her and told her he would never let her go. There was no doubt she was his and perhaps, she was always his and they just needed to wait for their time.

Dancing really was emotion through bodily movement and he sent her through a journey of how he’s waited so long for her and would wait forever if she didn’t mind. If she could spend the rest of her life dancing in the kitchen with him, she’d say she finally got the one thing she desired the most and that was for someone to spend this lonely existence with that would unconditionally love her, more so than her children did. A man that wanted her but more importantly? A man that was ready for her and all the pieces that came with her. The good, the bad, the ugly. Clay wanted it all. 

Cupping his face, she smiled with her eyes, leaned forward and gave him an Eskimo kiss, brushing her nose against his. She held him close to her and fixed her gaze, locking her attention on him. Breathlessly, she whispered, [color=9f1b3e]“I love you too.”[/color]

Did she really just say what he thought she said? Did Caterina Belmonte, darling, sweetheart, love of his life finally say the words he had been desperately hoping to hear since he was twelve? Clay pulled her into his embrace and a strong passionate kiss. All the pain in his body melted away like ice, the fires of love taking over his entire being. He wanted to hear her say it again and again and he hoped that he would, for the rest of their lives together, if she’d have him for that long.

Clay didn’t want the kiss to end but he knew they’d both need air eventually, not that it mattered because he could now die quite happy in the knowledge that his Kitty felt the same for him as he did for her. Twelve years of longing, aching of a hunger for her and her love that he could not satiate had finally come to its climax. [color=BCDD81]“I love you.”[/color] He whispered into her lips. [color=BCDD81]“I hope you locked the door.”[/color]

She didn’t but he didn’t need to know that. If they got caught, that was one way for them to be found out but she felt like Mrs. Wednesday Drake-Davies could sense the hormones in the air. Cat wasn’t too worried. Women had great intuition, after all. Instead of answering him, she pressed her lips against his again but only for a lingering moment. Running her hand through his hair, she beamed brightly and repeated, this time with more vigor and not in a whisper, [color=9f1b3e]“I love you, Clayton Costigan.”[/color]  She said it again. She finally said it and she wouldn’t stop saying it. For once she was choosing something, someone for herself and no one else. She was choosing Clay. In the morning, during the day, and at night she would choose him. Time and time again. She would choose him. 

Hearing the words again was all he needed to hear for the rest of his life. Clay rolled over and shifted his weight onto her. He couldn’t stop kissing her now. He was going to kiss her until the day he died. He slipped his tongue into Cat’s mouth and reached down to unbutton those tight fitting jeans that made her ass look incredible. Every ache in his body had been transformed from one of pain to one of desire, a delirious desire for them to be together. He hurried to strip off her lower half and climbed fully atop. Clayton covered their bodies with the thin white sheet as he grabbed a handful of her silky hair. [color=BCDD81]“Cat…”[/color] He paused, staring into hazel dreamscapes and caressing her lips. [color=BCDD81]“It’s you. It’s always been you.”[/color]

His words. His eyes. His love. 

Cat wanted to savor it all. Burning for him, surrendering all of her — body, heart, and soul  — to him, she gripped his hair and held onto his neck. Pulling his bottom lip with her teeth, she smirked and whispered in return, [color=9f1b3e]“Never let me go.”[/color] 

They kissed again and she gasped into his mouth as he came closer, breaking all distance, no wall needing to be scaled. There was no end and no beginning. They were together, sinking to deep places, exploring every corner of each other’s body. Expressing all the love they shared in their hearts. Intense and wild, full of desire.  The kind of love that takes your breath away. When they kissed, it was like drinking salted water. It only made them want more.

She wanted more. 

Clay finally got everything he ever wanted. [/indent][/indent][/color]