But it wasn't and don't beat yourself up over it cause I'm pretty sure you have a ton of good memories. I can only go from experience with my dad but he hated people seeing him ill because he looked nothing like the man he was and he couldn't do a lot. So in a way, people that weren't around were better off because they didn't have the image of how sick he was.

So you have the grandma you knew in your mind and trust me she'd want that version to stick.