She hated her room, it was a prison. 
She loved her room, it was safe. 
She hated the world, where everything she loved could be lost in an instant, where no matter how much she tried, she would never truly be able to make her dreams come true. 
She loved the world, where her sister once played, where her parents still sat besides the door and talked, where her smile still shone and her books showed her a path to making everyone happy. 

But even if she loved it, even if she missed it, she hated it, she was afraid of it, and truly would she be any happier under the sun than gazing longingly at those beautiful pictures, remembering those happy memories, and studying for truths she would never need to truly use.

A pair of old gloves peaked out of her bag, shiny red, a gift from her sister who saw too many programs of doctors snapping gloves onto their hands and forgot they used disposable, sterile latex. They were pretty, they were precious, they were just like her - useless, perfect for going outside and showing off but when she was trapped within this prison of her own making, what use was that? 

Eyes flickered over to the bed past the blank screen and covered windows, to the camera plastered with stickers hidden within her old school bag, an oversized furry thing she used to love. She'd hug it when going to bed, the weight of the books, of the knowledge guiding her to slumber, now it was just a way to keep precious things safe, and too full of those precious memories to cling tightly anymore. 

A flash of light out of nowhere. Were her parents coming around again? Trying to guide her to walk out of this, to push her and care for her again, to show her the kindness she failed to deliver to the person who mattered most to all of them, but no sounds came forth, no lowered voices or passionate pleas, the light didn't widen like the door being opened, it didnt rattle like something knocking on the covered window, it simply was.

It simply was her computer, the screen lit up despite her not being near it, her eyes closed for a moment, a prank? Did someone really want to punish her more? To ruin her computer after she had ruined everything else. But no, she had to try, she might not be a genius with computers like some, but surely she could do something, even if she failed when it mattered, she couldn't fail all the time, right?

It was a simple box, a simple question, and truly if this was a joke, if this was a cruel prank - what did she have to lose?

DO YOU SEEK FREEDOM? Of course, but how can you be free of yourself? 

DO YOU SEEK ESCAPE? How? How can I escape my own worthlessness? 

A finger wavered, an arm reached out, grabbing her old bag, her old dreams and hopes and memories, it had been a while, but it seemed even now she couldn't escape that old habit. A bag no longer full of books, but full of memories, she could clutch it like a teddy bear regardless, she could cling tight and dream about one day being truly free. 

Y.
E.
S.

And then the world went mad. The screen growing bigger and closer, that light at the end of the tunnel she dreamt of saving others from, was it coming for her? Perhaps it was time, perhaps with this her family could move on, they lost their children years ago, now they could bury them together. This may have been her fault, pressing that button, but maybe this was the kindest solution for everyone. 

Her eyes refused to focus, the onrushing light becoming blinding, but she refused to look away, refused to close her eyes and reject what her worthlessness had sent her sister to. "Ah, sister. I'm coming..."

The light became everything, became blinding. And everything fell away, leaving a blank room, a hollow house, and an empty family.



Her eyes focused again as she heard a voice calling out, eyelids blinking open after they had shut at a point she simply didn't recall, the comforting weight of her bag on her chest. Had she fell asleep? Had all that been just a bad dream?  But she felt the ground beneath her, it wasn't her bed, it wasn't even her floor or chair like she sometimes fell asleep in. It was the forest floor and a group of people were laying down around her. This was too elaborate for a prank, too cruel for some desperate attempt of her family. There was only one real option for what this could be, one reason she had seen that light and then found herself like this...

"Ah, is this hell? I suppose it makes sense. Maybe that was Lucifer here to take our souls for our sins..."

An arm reached down, a leg tensed beneath her, with a moment of difficulty, Melissa rose to stand, eyes open and gazing almost melancholy towards the canopy above them, bag clutched to her chest and hair hanging limply around her face. 

"If any of you need any help, if you've been hurt... I'm here to help for what it may be worth, just don't. Just don't ask me to save you, I'm no-one special, not anymore."