1. We submit to the court's attention that Princess-Alpha Redana Claudius stepped in front of her wife when faced with a sudden attack from someone who seemed nice, if frazzled. We speculate that it is, in fact, because on the level of instinct, Redana still wants to be there for Bella, to protect her, despite all that they have been through together, despite the fact that Bella could pick up this frizzly-haired assailant and put her up on a shelf (high), despite her hope that she has reached the end of the quest.

2. We further submit that while Redana put her hand on her sword's hilt, she hesitated to draw. For a moment there, she hoped that maybe she was wrong. That she'd misunderstood something. That she'd turn around and, just like in her nightmares, the Master of Assassins would be standing there, only her head would be falling off and this swordswoman would click her sword back into her scabbard and, with eyes grown suddenly as hard as granite, say, "Tch. You're [i]welcome.[/i]"

3. We deny categorically that she has "forgotten her training" and "gotten soft," despite whispers to the contrary from Professional Associates A-H gathered in the area, who drew their weapons (five swords, a ceremonial labrys, a naginata and a weighted net) to back up their Princess-Alpha. We submit to the court that further speculation along this line of questioning would risk prejudicing the court and hampering the Princess-Alpha's divine mandate to carry the message across the universe at what is almost certainly the finish line.

3.5. If it turns out that the message was actually for someone on Tellus the entire time, we request that the court allow some time for yowling, crying, and kicking various cans and bottles into the lake. This allowance will not compromise Trip 2.0: I Don't Want To Lethe Again, Daddy, Make Us A Bridge Or Something, I'm Not Forgetting My Wife Again, Fuck.

4. We submit to the court that, as soon as the aggressor started sheathing her weapons, the Princess-Alpha relaxed and looked to Bella Hostilius Mosaic with a wry smile and a conciliatory release of Relief from her glands, before turning to address the assailant again. Please note that she did not let go of her sword's hilt, and the claim otherwise is defamatory.

5. We submit to the court that the part of Redana that had enjoyed working with the Hermetics and the ship crews as a part of a larger whole was the part that let out the shrill shriek when the [i]Plousios[/i] - which, we note, was literally her comfort starship - fell into two pieces as a direct result of what we all presume was one of the assailant's cuts.

5.5. The assailant literally apologized and admitted that she had intended for her attack to be parried.

5.55. The Princess-Alpha could not have parried that.

5.555. Bella Hostilius Mosaic could totally have parried that, but chose not to do so.

5.5555. We theorize it was because her wife was acting in the name of Ceronian chivalry, which currently requires all the advocates it can get, given the political leanings of the current Shogun.

5.55555. It is honorable that the Princess-Alpha throw herself in front of threats, especially ones which she has no hope of overcoming or ones which are looking for a potential abduction victim, and we humbly submit the Bella Heart Hellscape Nightmare (Fuck You, Aphrodite) file for consideration in the matter.

6. We submit that the Princess-Alpha allowing her hand to go slack as she stood behind her wife and peered around her at devastation which not even a thunderbolt could equal was not rank cowardice but, in fact, a prudent acknowledgement that her weapon would not, in this case, suffice to defend her crew if the blushing, stammering girl before them (that is to say, behind them, as they were turned around at the time) were to suddenly throw out another attack of the same caliber.

7. We submit to the court that Redana took several deep breaths, hands held in front of her face, and let the shiver run from the base of her bushing tail up to her triangles before she shuffled back around and, wide-eyed, informed the assailant that, "We would love tea. Bella does the best tea in the whole universe."

7.5. The Princess-Alpha is willing to swear under oath that Pretty Kitty Meowmeow Sweet Tea is, in fact, still the best drink in the entire universe, and she is aware that it is just whatever tea Bella has brewed today, and she is also aware that the last time she asked for it Bella picked her up and carried her out of the room, but that will not stop her from suggesting it under her breath anyway, as a tactical concern, as plying the assailant with the best drink in the entire universe is just common sense, and the fact that her tail was wagging shows that, in fact, she is full of love and is not a "dumbass," Mrs. Mosaic Claudius.

8. Given all of the above, we request that the court give us a nice teatime where the Princess-Alpha receives headpats, explanations for what is going on here, immediate remedy for the damage to her literal comfort starship, and kissies from her wife for being brave in the face of starship-cleaving secret blades, to the fullest extent of the law, with extreme prejudice, and furthermore that her pack be barred from initiating leadership challenges at this critical juncture, given the extraordinary circumstances and the fact that she is so fucking close.

8.5. The Princess-Alpha also requires time for the thought she just had to unfold fully, the itch in the back of her thoughts to be scratched, and the feeling she feels when she watches the wind dance over the hills covered in grass and sunlight and sheeps with lace ribbons.

8.5.5. The Princess-Alpha disavows thinking about how cute Dolce would look in a lace ribbon, despite the undeniable fact that he would look absolutely precious, legally speaking, and maybe Vasilly is thinking the same thing? Maybe? Maybe if she makes eye contact with Vasilly she'll realize it all on her own, despite the fact that she's totally not thinking about that.