[center][h1]And There Was Light[/h1][/center]

[hr]

Just before the world would be bathed in light, when Teefee and Tad pulled the family sled. Toffee and her mother walked ahead, out of earshot but in silence. Toffee’s mind was a mess, her heart was heavy and she felt as if she had sullied herself. It was just an accident, right? No- It had not been an accident, no matter how much she wished it to be. She remembered so vividly the heft of the spear, the weight as she lifted it, the power behind her throw. When had she gotten so strong? On and on her thoughts raged as the battle within pushed and pulled from the deep abyss of nothingness that threatened to drag her down, to the rationalization of the killing. 

She of course had hunted animals before, She had been taught to wield a spear by her mother, they all had but only she and Tad hunted. Toffee could remember the rabbit which her spear had pierced. Right through the center of it. As blood gushed forth it kicked at the air, unable to move. A prisoner in its own dying shell. She had put it out of its misery with bashing of its head and from that day on, she vowed to make the cleanest kill possible. No more suffering. No more pain as the creature died. 

Malac had died quickly. [i]Too quickly.[/i] No, that wasn’t right. His death was painless. He probably didn’t even realize what had happened. Right? It was this part of her mind that was beginning to win. She could feel guilty all she wanted but the fact remained; he was going to do something unthinkable to Teefee and his death was warranted. Why feel remorse or melancholy about it? But then again, why did she need to feel at all? Why couldn’t she just… Teeter on the edge of that abyss and dip a toe in. It wouldn’t be that bad to slip into a melancholy.

But what about her siblings? Her mother? They needed her. Or did they? Who would want someone as broken as she? Was she broken? Or was it just more of this stupid guilt weighing her down. 

“Toffee. Stop.” Her mother’s voice made her blink in surprise. She looked to Ina, who stared at her with an expression of worry. 

“Stop what?” Toffee tried to play dumb. 

“I know what it is that you dwell upon, daughter and you must stop.” her mother said, looking ahead to the distant stars. “On and on it will go. For to take a life, is no easy thing to come to terms with. But letting it consume your every action, will only lead you to a dark place.”

Teefee scowled as a sudden wave of anger peppered her. What did her mother know? How could she be so callous? So she voiced her opinion. “You know nothing mother. I have killed a man. I have sullied myself. Instead of facing the ancestor’s judgement, we are fleeing the tribe.” She, of course, wasn't entirely truthful but her mother didn’t need to know everything. 
Ina remained quiet for a time and only once Toffee kept glancing at her and fidgeting, did her mother speak once more. “I once killed a woman.”

Toffee’s eyes went wide with shock as she looked at her mother. 

“She was from another tribe during the days of fleeing. It was a chance meeting. Everyone was sick and hungry. Those of us who were strong were sent further and further to find what we could. I guess she was in the same predicament. I had found a small pond of the clearest blue water you had ever seen. I still remember the taste. She came out of the woods and stared at me. I remember her so vividly.” Her mother paused, still looking ahead. “She demanded I leave, that it was her water. I refused and she came at me. After a short tussle next to the bank, I managed to grab hold of a rock and smashed it across her head. She went limp and that was that.”

Her mother finally looked at her and where Toffee thought she would see remorse or guilt, she only saw a fierce determination. “It broke my heart to take a life, Toffee but she would have killed me. I did what I had to do, to protect myself. And you did what you had to do to protect Teefee.”

“It’s not the same.” Toffee blurted. 

“Isn’t it?” her mother snapped back, “He harmed your sister. He harmed you. He could have put his seed inside her, Toffee. He could have killed her.” Toffee looked away, tears beginning to well, ones she tried to banish until she felt a hand on her shoulder. 

Her mother’s voice was softer now, “I told you before Toffee, I do not blame you, I do not hate you. Now you must learn to do the same. As I did. As others have done before you. For the world is a brutal place, my daughter and every day is a fight for survival. No matter what shape it takes.”

Toffee, lost for words, only nodded. But she knew it was easier said than done. 

“Would you like to know how I dealt with what I did? Outside of coming to terms with it, I mean.”

Toffee nodded again. 

“I told your father, I told my own mother while she still clung to life. I confided in them and they told me what I have told you now. It is good to talk with the ones we love, for they remind us why we do what we do.” A quick pause, “I told you this act would be one you had to live with and you will but do not let yourself believe it has sullied you in some way. Malac would not have even blinked if he had done the same. Why let it bother you so?”

She gulped and finally found her voice. “This sadness I feel threatens to drag me down but part of me has already begun to accept it. Why must the line be so thin?”

“Oh daughter,” Her mother put an arm around her, “Taking life is no easy thing and it shouldn’t be. When it becomes as easy as eating, then a part of us is lost forevermore. But to take a life in the name of life, hard as it is, is necessary. And these feelings that come with it, just mean you have not lost yourself. With the water I found, I managed to give life to those that needed it and without it, my own mother would have passed far sooner than she did. I would not have had you, if the other woman had killed me. This is life.”

There was a shared silence between the two as Toffee contemplated. It was just a part of life, wasn’t it? It shouldn’t be but it was. Mother was right. Malac would have killed them both and not have cared in the slightest. But Toffee realized that a part of her was glad she did care, that she did feel remorse. For it meant that she was far better than him. It would take time but Toffee knew this would not defeat her. She would find beauty in the world still, despite what she had done or what she would do, in the future.

“Thank you mother. I love you.” Toffee said at last, wrapping her own arm around her mother’s waist. She leaned into her and sighed.

“You are loved, never forget that my heart.” Her mother said.

And then, as if in answer to Toffee’s silent thoughts, the sun began to glow. 

[hr]

Teefee sneezed. Toffee sneezed. Tad sneezed. And they kept sneezing as the light grew brighter and brighter. Though this was happening and their eyes were watering and their heads were hurting, none of them could look away. Shadows were banished from their perception. The haze, yes the haze that had always been in the sky, was purged to reveal a deep blue that hid the stars like a blanket. All at once, it was as if they could see. As if they had been blind their entire lives- the grey netherworld burst into color unimaginable. Deep greens. Rich greens. Dry yellows. Warm reds. The earth was littered with browns and grays and rocks that glittered for the first time in their existences. 

Their mother was the first to fall to her knees as she wept unbidden. She prayed to the ancestors, she prayed to the great light in the sky, to the wind, yes the warm breeze that came and tickled them and she prayed to all the colors of the earth and she kissed the land and outstretched her arms to the heavens. 

The triplets followed her example, so profound was it to be alive in that moment, that all the pain of the day's past were banished. So consuming was this revelation of light, so invoking of what it was to be breathing in the air, blessed as they were- it felt as if they were the ones to be witnessed. So shattered was their worldview that it took a long time to even comprehend that the world had never been dull, it was just that they had been unable to see it as it should have been seen. 

They were not so alone on that perch of grass, now that they could see unhindered. The land about them was teeming with life. So too did the animals bask in the new light, so too did some hide and flee from the illumination of the sky. Others chirped and sang and called forth to begin life in this new state. Insects buzzed and took flight, while birds swooped and their plumages radiated iridescently in the sky. Of colors in colors that danced and were joyous to be at least seen and appreciated. 

Even the grasses and the shrubs seemed to rejoice, shivering with anticipation and turning to face this new source of nourishment. 

All the while Toffee was slack-jawed. Tad’s eyes were wide and his pupils dilated as he looked about. Teefee’s smile was so large despite her blurred vision, for tears were streaking down her face. Untold minutes passed as the family took it all in and then there came the greatest surprise of all. 

It was Toffee who finally looked away from the colorful word to look upon her siblings and mother. It was then she broke into a garbled cry, so heavy was her emotion. She could only point at Teefee and Tad and mother. 

“I can see you.” she said at last, as they gathered around her in concern. And it was true. Their appearances to one another had always been under the light of the stars or the red glow of a fire. Now and only now, were they able to look at the fine coloring of Toffee’s brown hair, almost hazel in the light now. Or the deep grey with lighter strands that were Tad’s and the dirty white of Teefee’s mane. For she needed a good wash. 

They looked upon their mother and they saw the same face but with now an untold warmth that only light could reveal. Her eyes seemed to dance as she too saw her children in vivid tones. They all began to cry and where their tears fell onto the earth, unbeknownst to them, the plants lapped it up and demanded more. 

So it was that the family continued on, only an hour or two having passed but bit by bit they began to notice a different change. Fields of flowers and other plants besides the familiar tallgrass were bursting through the soil. Even more color was added to this new tapestry. Pinks and whites, blues and oranges, purples and reds. Even the leaves of shrubs and other leafy plants sprouted with vivid greens tipped with a creamy color and yellows. Here and there, the leaves were glossy and dark or fuzzy and bright. 

Teefee was having the time of her life, unable to stay still for too long in one place as she danced and ooo’d and awed at every little thing that caught her interest. She giggled wildly when a caterpillar crawled up her arm and she went eerily silent when a butterfly landed upon her nose. But her smile could be seen throughout. 

That left Tad and Toffee to pull the sled and for once, they were content to do so, as they watched their sister enjoy herself. 
But it was only when a few more hours passed when Toffee began to notice that the plantlife around them was still growing.

“Are the plants… Growing?” Toffee asked Tad. 

Tad looked at her with a quizzal expression. “They’ve been growing, you dolt.”

“No I mean, I know that, it’s just, they haven’t stopped growing? The sled is getting harder to pull brother. The grass once came up to our knees, now it's almost up to our chests. Surely you’ve noticed that.” Toffee said, rolling her eyes. 

“Well, I guess now that you mention it, yeah. But that’s probably just because they are basking in the new light. I’m sure it will end.”

It did not end and when they all started sneezing again it wasn’t because of the light. The air had become thick, slowly but surely, with a myriad of pollen. Teefee came back with a runny nose and red rimmed eyes. Even their mother was looking uncomfortable. Toffee kept sniffling and sneezing and Tad kept muttering under his breath about the air quality.

It quickly became too much and to their horror, the colorful world around them began to wither and die. The blessed light had gifted too much of itself and now all would suffer the consequences. The air had grown so thick with pollen that the air was now choking and only by the quick thinking of their mother had they been able to rip off a few thin furs to cover over their faces. Only their eyes would suffer the bite and sting of the air and the blur of their eyes from all the tears that began to stain their faces. 

They needed to find shelter but in the open plains, there was little respite and it was becoming harder to see. 

A dip in between two hills proved to be their only shot at weathering out this sudden catastrophe. They huddled down, pulling their furs over them into a thick blanket and though it was hot and stifling, it provided a small amount of relief for their eyes and throats. 

It had been such a wondrous day of beginnings but now the cold knife of uncertainty had wedged itself back into their hearts. All of them fell asleep and their dreams were not kind.


[hider= Summary]
The cat family experiences the sunlight for the first time and then, of course, the aftermath.
[/hider]