[center][h1][color=sienna]Jaxon Nowak[/color]
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Jaxon wondered if he looked directly at Summer for too long if he would go blind. There was something brilliant about her eyes, so full of emotions and life. And there was something even more dazzling about her smile. The real one. Not the forced one that she was giving him right now as she brought up Austin’s funeral. 

Jax had always been really good at picking up the little things. The forced eye strain and the slight twitches of the corner of the lip when someone was pretending to smile and holding it for too long. But he was never good at figuring out what those things meant. He had always assumed that it was because he was making the other person uncomfortable, rather than some other underlying factors. 

Yet this felt different. Despite how busy it was today in the shop, for a moment it felt like they were in their own little bubble. Watching her play with her hair nervously, made him feel like maybe she was in the same boat as him. They were just two people connected by the loss of someone that was probably more important to them than any outsider would be able to understand. It made him want to open up to her, to let her know that she wasn’t alone.

[color=sienna] “I… didn’t know Austin really well,”[/color] he found himself admitting and finally looking at Summer directly in the eyes. He held his gaze, even though he could feel his social anxiety rising as he felt her eyes focused back on him. He felt like she could see right through him, into his soul- something he never wanted anyone to see. [color=sienna] “Even so, he still made an impact on me. He was just that type of person, you know? I mean, of course you know. You probably know better than I do because…”[/color]

He paused his rambling to let out a rare chuckle- or rather it slipped out. He didn’t even remember when was the last time he laughed out loud. It wasn’t that he said anything particularly funny, but he was suddenly amused by how awkward he was. For a brief second, it felt like a weight had been lifted from his heart. [color=sienna]”Sorry, I guess I didn’t even answer your question. Yeah, I’ll be there. Your car was my last job for the day and then I’m going to go back home to make myself somewhat presentable.”[/color]

There was a pause as he settled back down to his usual self. The heaviness from his insecurities and self doubt returned, and he was now embarrassed by his words and actions. He gave her a final nod before slipping away from the conversation. [color=sienna]”See you later, Summer,’[/color] he said so softly that he wasn’t even sure if he said it aloud. 

[hr]
After clocking out, he drove back to his childhood home. It was a humble, little house with only two bedrooms, but that was plenty for their small family. When he got in through the garage, his grandpa was watching television while his grandma was folding some laundry. Jaxon mumbled some sort of greeting as he sped past them to go upstairs. 

He tried to find the most suitable black outfit for the occasion and had to settle with a grey shirt, black jacket and his darkest pair of jeans. As he took a shower, he could not help but replay the conversation he had with Summer earlier. Why did she have to come into the shop and why today of all day? He scrubbed hard to get the dirt and grime from work off his body, as if it would also help wash away the embarrassment he felt from their interaction. Part of him wanted to believe that he was fine and that he didn't do or say anything particularly weird but his insecurities continued to nag at him. [i]"Why do you even bother?"[/i] they scowled. [i]"Why are you even going to the funeral anyway? It's not like anyone would care if you were there. It's not like [i][b]he[/b][/i] would care if you were there.[/i]" 

He turned off the water and felt his body shiver from coming into contact with the cold air. He took a deep breath to steel his nerves. [color=sienna][i]"I'm going because I want to go. For myself. Not anyone else,"[/i][/color] he thought, fighting back the negative thoughts as he dried himself off with a towel. Then he got dressed and headed out, making his way toward the funeral before he could change his mind again.